Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Advice on 2.4yo not eating dinner. WWYD?

41 replies

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 17:37

Ds1 is 2.4 years old. He has been in the dinner refusnik phase for quite a while now. He will eat dinner if it's fish fingers and potato waffles, but won't show interest in much else.
If he doesn't even attempt to eat anything or even try it, should I leave it and tell him there will be nothing until the next meal time or give him his fruit as normal?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Missus84 · 01/01/2010 17:39

Does he eat well the rest of the time?

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 17:43

Not really.
He will push his dinner plate off the table unless its fish fingers or nuggets.
He does like pasta but eating depends on his mood.
He loves fruit and yoghurts so has those after breakfast and when he's eaten a meal, but lately hes been doing the same with lunch.
For lunch he normally has crackers and things because he doesn't like/won't eat bread.
I gave in with dinner and just gave him fishfingers etc as I know he'd eat it, but now am trying to alternate things. A proper meal and thefollowing day just freezer stuff.

OP posts:

pinchmeimustbedreaming · 01/01/2010 17:45

you say ds1 so i presue you have another? what are his eating habbits like?

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 17:46

Yes, ds2 is 10 months and is fine. He's been BLW and eats anything I put infront of him. Tonight we had pork chops topped with apple sauce and melted cheese with a roasted potato and veg salad. Ds2 ate it all.

OP posts:

pinchmeimustbedreaming · 01/01/2010 17:52

i have a friend who only has 1 ds and he is the same age, he does a simular thing.i'm absolutely certain he has a bit of a power struggle with her. is it possible your ds is doing the same? maybe he sees how you praise ds2 and wants some attention for himself so is playing up? sorry i cant actually talk from direct experience as my ds 2.7 eats like a horse, i feel for you though it must be terribly worrying

Missus84 · 01/01/2010 17:53

I'd maybe try keeping fruit and yoghurt to breakfast (and maybe snacks) so there isn't the expectation of something sweet at every meal. Offer healthy meals, and if he's hungry he'll eat, but don't make a big deal out of it if he doesn't want anything. Missing one meal won't do him any harm, and if he's hungry he'll eat the next meal/snack.

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 17:55

pinch Thanks. I've only started praising ds2 since ds1 has been doing this.......but possibly about control. I suppose it's one of the few things he can do isn't it?
Missus84 Yes, I agree, but it's not just 1 meal, it could be every dinner for over 2 weeks!

OP posts:

coldtits · 01/01/2010 17:56

With normal toddlers, the only way to cure this is to never serve the favoured items again.

With ds2 it was noodles. He would scream if he saw the saucepan and it didn't have noodles in it. I tried alternating - that made it worse. I had to ditch them and let him get properly hungry. We didn't have noodles for 2 months - and guess what? When we finally did (you''ve already guessed, haven't you?) he wouldn't eat them!

needtomoveon · 01/01/2010 17:56

Agree with the power struggle/attention thing maybe because little bro is stealing quite a bit of attention over Christmas. 10 mos old is a cute age and rellies do tend to fuss little cuties without thinking about how older kids feel. AT his age he is really thinking about how he is independent of you and will try to exercise that quite a bit.

Also, my kids are eating little at the moment and the older one is usually fine. I blame all the Christmas hype, being stuck indoors and missing normal routines and friends. As long as you keep offering small amounts of reasonably healthy stuff then he will eat (and fish fingers and waffles count as that). You could try and get him involved - maybe get a pizza base and let him "help" do the toppings

Missus84 · 01/01/2010 17:58

Realistically though, he won't starve himself for two weeks. Don't you think he would go to bed hungry a couple of times and then realise it's a bit rubbish, and not really worth it if refusing dinner gets no reaction?

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 17:58

Lol coldtits
So you're saying don't ever give him fishfingers? I'm alternating because my parents told me I shouldn't leave him too long only offering food he probably won't eat......(but then I was an awful eater as a child too, so don't know why I'm listening to them

OP posts:

MegBusset · 01/01/2010 17:59

DS1 is just the same. I have never made him go hungry but just give a boring snack (toast or fruit) after tea if he doesn't eat. I do stick mainly to what he likes -- he's another fish finger fan. At one point they were the only cooked food he would eat.

I am finding it easier to get him to try new things these days -- he is 2.10 and the increased communication helps. He will now eat fish cakes, chicken dippers, spag in tomato sauce and cous cous! But he is just not foodie generally.

DS2 (8mo) otoh is a dustbin and will eat anything! So i'm convinced fussy eaters are born not made.

cece · 01/01/2010 17:59

My eldest is like this. TBH I only cook one meal and she has to find something in it to eat otherwise she will be hungry! So far she has got to the age of 8 barely eating her evening meal most days! On occasions she would eat the plate though. She is average height and weight so guess she is doing OK with this system.

TBH I try to include one thing I know she will eat in each meal and then I just make sure everyone else is happy! No comment is made if she doesn't eat everything. But something is said if she eats nothing and then she is made to eat at least a few mouthfuls!

pinchmeimustbedreaming · 01/01/2010 18:00

also is it an option to go back to basics. for instance if he likes mash start adding some swede or carrot.

if it is a control thing then you need to get to the bottom of why and it wont matter what you put n front of him x

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 18:01

Missus84 Hew has gone 2 weeks without dinner before before I gave in and did fishfingers. Tbh, I think he goes to bed most of the time hungry. For example for lunch today, he had 1 square of cheese, so I didn't give him anything until dinner and he didn't touch dinner. Same yesterday and day before.
ntmo Ds1 gets alot more attention atm, because he is being very clingy and whingy, so don't think it's that, but yeah I agree about the power and control. I'll have to just ignore it won't I?

OP posts:

Missus84 · 01/01/2010 18:05

That's quite extreme! For three days he's only eaten a piece of cheese? Is he a healthy weight? Is there definitely no medical reason he could be refusing to eat?

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 18:06

Ok. Thanks everyone.
He doesn't like mash, or pizza.
I did a roast dinner the other day, knew he wouldn't eat it so I did him a potato waffle instead of roast potatoes. He ate that, so maybe that's the key. Let him see something he likes so at least he sits at the table, so I could give fishfingers but serve interesting potatoes and veg

OP posts:

MegBusset · 01/01/2010 18:07

Also, does he have any veg that he likes? DS1 loves peas and sweetcorn (thank god) so whenever I try something new I stick one or the other alongside it so if nothing else he'll have a bit of veg.

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 18:08

Missus He eats breakfast. He has a bowl of cereal, then a yoghurt and maybe a banana.
He is on the 91st centile so weight is not an issue.
I have spoken to my health visitor and she said not to worry, just ride it out

OP posts:

coldtits · 01/01/2010 18:08

Fussy toddlers will fixate on two or three food items. They will be food they are familiar ith. Best that this isn't junk, really.

I got caught out with ds1, demadning chips and sausage every day. I had to bin it. I don't mind if their fixation is cheese, or chicken, or pasta, or broccoli, or baby oranges, or carrots (and my kids both went through days of only wanting cheesy pasta with broccoli) - all are healthy enough to be eaten every day but waffles and fish fingers, IMHO, are not good enough. You need to 'switch' him.

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 18:09

Meg yeah, I do that too with peas and sweetcorn, but mostly that's not enough to keep his plate on the tablem iyswim. I think it depends on mood and tiredness also

OP posts:

coldtits · 01/01/2010 18:09

And fishfingere, potaotes and veg is perfectly fine meal IMO

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 18:11

coldtits That's what I think. IMO, there's nothing wrong with fish fingers and waffles, but not everyday. I'd be fine with it twice a week if he was eating other stuff.
It's my fault really for not making more of an effort before. I gave in too quick and left him eating nuggets etc because at the time I thought that was better than nothing

OP posts:

coldtits · 01/01/2010 18:18

If it was only twice a week it would be fine, but because of the nature of toddlers, to choose 2 or 3 things they will eat and nowt else, you'll have to be sly in what you let them have.

Ideally, you want at one of those things to be a fruit or a veg, one to be a healthy carb, and one to be a healthy protein.

Try him with a chicken drumstick - the novelty of eating a bone might win out. Plus raw carrot sticks/slices of apple go down well.

Original poster

littleboyblue · 01/01/2010 18:22

I'll try chicken drumsticks. Not done that before for him.
I try to give raw carrot at lunch.
Lunch is normally Crackers with somesort of spread, cubes of cheese, half a carrot, some cucumber, and then some raisens or grapes etc

OP posts:

Flip

1 2