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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Gina Ford and waking a sleeping baby

21 replies

SleepySheep · 21/12/2009 11:26

I've just read some of the threads regarding this woman, so please don't hate me, I really need some advice!

My son is now 5 weeks old and to begin with we tried the GF routine mainly because we were so scared of doing something wrong we found the routine reassuring. He happily fed every three hours.

But just recently, he wants to feed evey two hours during the day and pretty much sleep inbetween. We're scared that so many books state that a baby of this age should only sleep about 4 hours a day! So how do you and should you wake a sleeping baby? Will this effect his nighttime sleeping if I just leave him? At the moment at night he goes evey 3-4 hours.

Please help!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TheArmadillo · 21/12/2009 11:29

Sounds like he's doing fine.

Don't wake a sleeping baby - you will come to regret it.

Probably hitting a growth spurt. If you're breastfeeding then every 2 hours is normal.

Ds was the same at this age.

Ignore the books - the baby hasn't read them and doesn't know what he's supposed to be doing . I think most babies sleep most of the time still at this age.

You're doing fine

coldtits · 21/12/2009 11:29

Leave him alone. He's 5 weeks old and too young for a woman who has never met him and has no children of her own to be deciding when he may and may not sleep.

thisparachuteisaknapsack · 21/12/2009 11:35

I did Gina with mine but they all slept much more than 4 hours during the day and were always a couple of weeks behind on the routines. I would wake him to feed him if he was going too long between feeds (more than 3.5-4 hrs) but I wouldn't wake him in the hope that it will make him sleep longer at night.

He may be going through a growth spurt which will mean more frequent feeds around the clock for a few days before he settles down again. He will need more sleep at this time too due to the energy he is using to grow and feed.

He is probably both feeding more frequently and waking more at night because of a growth spurt rather than waking at night because he is sleeping more during the day.

tethersjinglebellend · 21/12/2009 11:35

IME, babies sleep when they need to- he is only 5 weeks; he is just following his own routine

My DD was a big sleeper, she slept loads in the day, still does (she's 12 months now) and slept through the night at 10 weeks.

Some people advise that if a baby has regular naps, they are more 'relaxed' and sleep well at night; to be honest, I think each baby is different, and you should follow their lead- especially at 5 weeks. If he is sleeping 3-4 hours at night, that's pretty good. Personally, I wouldn't wake him.

Please don't worry- if it makes you feel any better, Gina Ford doesn't have any children

Find your own way, and do what feels right for you and your DS.

Original poster

SleepySheep · 21/12/2009 11:36

Thats what I think, but OH has such a stressful job he gets concerned if DS sleeps too much in the day he'll keep us awake all night

OP posts:

Original poster

SleepySheep · 21/12/2009 11:37

Ohhh just found christmas smileys

OP posts:

dizietsma · 21/12/2009 11:38

What coldtits said.

It would be delightful if babies did routines, but they simply are not capable at 5 weeks old of understanding the daily routines of a family. One of my problems with books like those by she-who-cannot-be-named is they give new mothers totally unrealistic expectations of life with a newborn, leading to feelings of failure and panic as the LO predictably fails to do what is expected. You are not doing anything wrong, and neither is your baby OP.

There's nothing wrong with trying to create some routines for your baby, but be realistic. At 5 weeks I think simply emphasizing night as quiet sleepy time and day as busy active time is more than enough. Work on more complex schedules when the baby has had time to acclimatise to being out of the womb!

tethersjinglebellend · 21/12/2009 11:39

He's 5 weeks old, he will definitely keep you awake at night I think it's a little unrealistic to expect a 5 week old to acknowledge that daddy has to get up in the morning!

Perhaps OH could sleep in another room on work nights?

Original poster

SleepySheep · 21/12/2009 11:45

At the moment he does really well at night. Goes down after a feed at 7pm, then wakes around 10pm, 2am, 4-5ish and 7ish which is great. I feel I'm just about getting enough sleep to stay sane. He went through a phase early on where he would wake between 2-4am and this nearly killed me. So we really don't want that to happen again

OP posts:

thedogsgottago · 21/12/2009 11:51

I dont know who Gina Ford is Im afraid, but I think feeding on demand is best, not suprising he wants feeding every 2 hours and sleeps, he's only 5 weeks thats all they do pretty much! Over the next couple of months or so you'll probably notice him staying awake more in the day, but dont worry to much about sleep paterns this young, my 2 1/2 YO still has a 2-3 hour nap in the day and sleeps about 10 hours at night, which is pretty much the same as my 6 month old! Babies are all different just go with what he wants, you'll find it alot less stressful than trying to live by some book or another.

thedogsgottago · 21/12/2009 12:02

just read about your OH needing sleep, perhaps sleep in the spare room if hes got a busy day next day, my partner did that i didnt resent it and i actually found it better as when the baby woke for a feed i didnt need to tiptoe about and could relax knowing i wasnt disturbing him...plus love having bed to myself to sleep spreadeagled!

Allets · 21/12/2009 12:37

Make the most of it while your DS is still a sleepy newborn. IME there is no way a five week old can reliably adhere to any routine, I believe it is just coincidence at this age.

From about 12-14 weeks, it's good to start a night-time routine, so that established events become familiar. With my babies this roughly coincided with sleeping longer at night and for shorter periods in the day.

Goes back to the best bit of advice I ever had, which is "sleep breeds sleep". This was always true for my 3, the better they slept in the day, the better the nights were.

Obviously as they get older (12-18months), then day time sleep does factor into what happens at night.

Good luck and congratulations on your new baby boy!

flowerybeanbag · 21/12/2009 12:48

DS2 is 6 weeks. At 5 weeks he was every 2 hours on the clock, 3 hours at night. This week it's calmed down a bit, went 6 hours last night, but has been 2 hourly again today.

Too young to reliably follow a routine anyway at this stage, I'm going with what he wants at the moment.

With DS1 we started writing down everything he did at about this point, and found after a week or so that actually he was more or less following GF by himself. So we started using it at about 8 weeks.

I will do the same with DS2 - start writing his feeding/sleeping down - and if a pattern is emerging we'll take it from there. But there isn't really at the moment, which is fine.

flowerybeanbag · 21/12/2009 12:56

Thinking about it I think the reason we were keen to establish a routine with DS1 was because we were new parents, finding it all overwhelming and a routine means there is someone essentially telling you what to do, so you feel less as though you are feeling your way in the dark.

With DS2 I'm comfortable I know what I'm doing so it concerns me less that he's all over the place at the moment.

As I said, as it happens DS1 fitted himself into the GF nicely without any problem, but if DS2 doesn't, I won't worry about it.

Dorchies · 21/12/2009 13:12

We did a routine - but it was only really the night time I was strict with as that was when I really wanted him to sleep. I roughly followed it in the day but I would probably let him sleep - he's still very little. My sister once told me "the more they sleep, the more they sleep" and I think I agree. My ds is now 7 months and he sleeps much better at night if he's slept lots in the day. I would say that at 5 weeks he should be sleeping much more than 4 hours. Every baby is different but i'd let him sleep as much as possible.

By the way, ds was sleeping through (7-7) the night at 11 weeks with just a dream feed at 11pm, so I do believe the routines do work (DD was 12 weeks when she managed it).

Original poster

SleepySheep · 21/12/2009 13:30

Thank you so much for all your messages. Does make me feel so much better that hopefully this won't be a problem. He's been awake this morning from 7-9 but has pretty much been asleep since. So hopefully we'll still have a good night!

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FanjolinaJolie · 28/12/2009 18:29

You are doing fine!!!

I followed GF with both of DD's and they were always 'behind' in the books by a few weeks and had more sleep than they were 'meant to'. Didn't make any difference at all in the end and it's v true 'more sleep makes more sleep'. I did pretty much stick to the feed times, though.

However if they woke and demanded a feed early I gave it as they were obviously hungry.

pigletmania · 28/12/2009 18:50

No leave him alone he is a newborn, feed him when he wants and leave him sleep. I kind of tried the controlled crying when dd was 1 and in her own room. No just take cues from your baby.

Baileysismyfriend · 28/12/2009 18:55

I had to wake a sleeping baby and he is unscathed from it!

My DS is five months old and for the first few weeks he was very very sleepy and as he had low blood sugar when in hospital we had to wake him in the night at 3am for a feed - had to set our alarm for it which sounds odd but he was sooooo sleepy that I had to make sure I woke him up rather than wait for him.

The only part of GF we followed is the waking at 7am, worked very well even if we had to wake him up and he is a very content baby.

I have never bothered with a daytime sleep routine though he sleeps when he likes but I always fed three hours at first - now its four hours.

Ohforfoxsake · 28/12/2009 19:04

At 5 weeks you should still be in bed, doing your baby's thing.

He'll have a growth spurt (which he is probably doing at the moment with all that eating and sleeping) and the routine will go out of the window. Or catch a cold, or something...

Those books aren't talking about your baby, its just the authors theory.

I'm a big fan of GF - she helped me when DS1 was tiny and I was going out of my mind.But by the time DC4 came along, I wasn't using her methods.

As with all this theory, find what works for you but be flexible. Get through this growth spurt, and review, get through the next thing, and review. Your baby's lead should be the first thing you follow, coupled with your instincts, and them some help from a stranger who hasn't actually had her own child but has some useful advice to give.

Good luck!

LoveBeingAMummyKissingSanta · 30/12/2009 08:30

I did a simlar thing to flowery, I wrote down whenever dd slept/fed/howlong which side etc. You will start to see a pattern.

I understand what you mean about your DH. Mine drives stuff around in a lorry that if he had a crash would leave a whole in the ground so he has to have sleep or it could kill him or others. I have found ways to get DD back to sleep if she wakes in the night, that if he didn't do that job I wouldn't, but still means she sleeps though most of the time.

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