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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

DD 8.7 puberty or just weigh gain?

20 replies

lexcat · 19/12/2009 11:33

I noticed she seem to have slightly swollen boobs a few week ago. Then yesterday she was running round without her t-shirt and one nipple appeared to be swollen. Was it just me and she was just cold or could it be the on set of puberty.

If it is the onset of puberty what next?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

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Mausilein · 19/12/2009 12:53

My DD is the same - same age as yours, same physical changes. The next thing ought to be pubic hair (under the arms first) and smelling sweaty! Periods are about 18 months away. I took my DD to the docs and was told that 8 is not considered to be too young (no matter how I might feel about it!)

cornysxmasmuffmusic · 19/12/2009 12:55

I think my ds is approaching puberty. (8-nearly 9)He gets spots on his nose ( which I scrub with my eve lom cleanser) and the other day he sat on my knee and had a distinct whiff of B.O. Poor lad. His older brother is the other end of the puberty spectrum I think!

Original poster

lexcat · 19/12/2009 13:02

She knows some things about puberty but haven't done the sex ed yet. When do you start that. Or do I just keep things very simple for now.

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cornysxmasmuffmusic · 19/12/2009 13:10

I haven't told my ds much. If his body starts to change earlier than secondary school I will seek advice from school nurse I think.

Mausilein · 19/12/2009 13:11

I'd keep things simple for now - mine understands that her body is changing. She has had underarm hair for more than a year and we've had a conversation about the changes that are happening that will eventually turn her into a woman. She has noticed her boobs for herself and is hoping that hers will be bigger than mine! We did have a brief conversation about periods because she raided the bathroom cupboard one day and found my tampons. I said that a woman's body prepares itself for getting pregnant each month and if it didn't get pregnant then you bleed for a few days but it's nothing to be scared about, it's just a bit messy. I'm not sure how much of the periods bit she understood. Fortunately she didn't ask how a pregnancy would come about (though am braced for that one)!

Original poster

lexcat · 19/12/2009 20:51

Are their any good books on the subject of puberty for parents.

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bigdonna · 20/12/2009 22:00

hi lexcat my dd was about 8 when her boobs started growing,she is now 10 has pubic hair,sweaty armpits but no hair under them,she is still like a bean pole though so still lots more changes to come!!!

Original poster

lexcat · 03/01/2010 16:57

DD got all in a panic because her nipples became tender for a few days then she had a tenderness and itchiness across the chest suggested putting some cream and tried explaining she was probably just starting to develop.

She broke down in tears she felt she to young and she stand out from her peer group leading to been bullied.

She hasn't got breast buds yet just a bit of general poddgy round the chest area and protruding nipples. I had to buy her a crop top just to put her mind at rest for the days she has PE.

Have I jumped the gun or is the the right thing to do and if it is puberty how long till others might notice she is developing.

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Jamieandhismagictorch · 03/01/2010 18:54

interesting to read this.

It makes me feel kind of sad. It's so young. I remember when my breast buds started (last year of Primary). I had a lump and it was very painful behind one nipple. I went to my mum and told her I thought I had cancer . Did not start periods until just over 14 though.

My DS1 is 9 and puberty is YEARS away. There's such a yawning gap between (many) girls and (many) boys.

Original poster

lexcat · 03/01/2010 20:31

Just about how I feel she's far too young. If she is hitting puberty now she could be 10 and starting periods which is so young. I was 13 myself.

By the time secondary school starts she already going to be a young woman.

It worries me as well as my dd, which is why I started this thresd in hope for some feedback and support. Plus maybe some mums who have been their with their dd have some words of wisdom.

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Jamieandhismagictorch · 04/01/2010 09:24

Yes, sorry I can't help

I'm looking forward to the challenges of teenage boys ....

moonowl · 31/01/2010 02:12

I'm very worried as my daughter has just got little lumps under her nipples and she's only nine. This is a few months after I had to deal with my son (13)'s worries over nipple development (apparently fairly normal in boys, and they went away). She is so petite though, and could pass for 7 or so, it just seems wrong! She's just a baby and is understandably freaked out! She knows about the birds and the bees, thats never been an issue, but she and I are worried as she doesn't want to grow up so fast! I'm going to take her to the gp, as I did with my son, for reassurance, but it's not something I thought I'd have to deal with for a few years yet!

nooka · 31/01/2010 02:29

My dd is nine, but wearing size 12 clothes, so I've been checking for signs of development. No breast buds yet, but she has started to get very fine, very blond hair on her legs and also in her pubic area. We've had lots of conversations over the years about growing up, sex, where babies come from etc etc. I think a little at a time, whenever asked (and my children are highly inquisitive!) is the best approach. Waiting for change and then doing "the talk" type approach I think is asking quite a lot of your child - it's a lot to take in. Better to start things off gently well before it matters I think. Weight gain will start breast development early. The only one of dd's friends who has any development going on is the one who is sadly really overweight. There is normally a big gap between the first signs of breast development and the start of periods though, so you have a good couple of years yet.

DawnAS · 01/02/2010 12:15

My DD is only 7 months so I'm not quite at this stage yet , but on the subject of what books to buy, I did a search on Amazon a while ago when my niece started asking me how my DD got into my tummy.

Found a great book by Miriam Stoppard about "Questions Children Ask", it's great and really easy to decide what to say as the answers are split into relevant ages.

There is another one aswell (can't remember the author) for the more scientific questions called "Why is Snot Green?" (nice title hey?).

HTH

frumpygrumpy · 01/02/2010 12:21

Just adding my voice to the I-have-a-young-DD-who-is-changing-much-too-early list. Me too. Sad. And we have to try to be positive for them! My DD1 has only just turned 9, has had nose spots for the last half year at least, body shape changing etc. I hope periods and boobs hold off as long as possible.......but I feel its going to be soon.

Original poster

lexcat · 01/02/2010 15:04

Having worried she's gone flat chested again, but "the colour area round the nipple is darker and larger" (dd wording there).She's growing again, nearly an inch since Christmas and she's getting a lovely shape with a waist she's never had before.

Is it possible to get hormone surges before starting puberty which may explain some of the signs of puberty. Or was it just a case of a bit of Christmas excess. She's suddenly becoming very grown-up not so much physically but as a person. I'm losing my little baby.

Found a really great book which came recommended by other mumsneters The Care & Keeping of You: The Body Book for Girls

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BigTillyMint · 01/02/2010 15:11

DD started with breast buds when she turned 9. They were painful and she looks so young for her age.... we were worried so there followed a few appointments to the doctor and hospital but it was all normal development.

She is now 10 1/2 and has got tiny boobies, but refused to wear even a crop top as she is in denial about growing up! The teenage tantrums are becoming more frequent though

Nothing else is happening, so don't worry too much - it mught be ages till yours start puberty properly.

bibbitybobbityhat · 01/02/2010 15:18

My dd (who was 9 last month) now wears deodorant every day. I have bought her one of the aluminium free ones. I feel wistful about it too!

At the moment she still shares a room and has baths with her 6 year old brother. I know it won't be for much longer .

Cabatach · 04/02/2010 22:10

My dd was eight and a half when her first pubic hair appeared. I felt distraught but managed to hide it. I spoke to my doctor as at that age there were no signs of development in me at all and my periods started at 13. Doctor said when puberty started did not depend on when it happened to the mother. However she is tall for her age and was told this is a factor.

She is now 10yrs 3months - has more pubic hair, no underarm hair, darker hair on her legs, breast buds etc. Thankfully her periods haven't started but feel it is only a matter of time. Also she has always been highly strung but even more so now, so no doubt there are hormones running riot!

My younger dd is nearly seven and is very tall for her age (wears 9/10 clothes). No signs of development but have been warned it could happen earlier with her. Even as a baby her chest was not completely flat (unlike her sister) and I try not to worry that she has breast buds! One of my friends has twin girls and she said that one is completely flat and has been since birth, while the other is not.

moonowl · 04/02/2010 23:09

Mine seems a bit more ok about it now, realises that it's not going to happen overnight and is a slow process. She has several slightly older friends, one of whom got her period at 11 but still acts very much like a little girl, and likes all the same hobbies my girl likes - craft, cute animals etc. so she has a good role model to look to. My 13 yr old son rightly said - you don't have to grow up if you don't want to - you can still like all the same stuff you like when you're a kid! I guess we'll just take it as it comes - as long as they can both feel like they are their own person, thats the main thing!

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