Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

Original poster

Constant refrain of 'I'm too tired'. Is there something wrong with her or is she just being annoying??

14 replies

Aranea · 06/12/2009 17:30

Dd is almost 5. I'm currently furious with her because we went out for a Christmassy afternoon - Santa's grotto, listening to carols - and she came over all floppy, said she was too tired and wanted to go home. She just flopped in dh's arms and wouldn't even play with her friend who we bumped into. When we got home she said she hadn't been too tired at all, just bored and not enjoying the carols which had gone on too long.

This isn't unusual for her. She will say she is 'too tired' to put her socks on or whatever, moves very slowly, goes all floppy and whingey. It drives me crazy. I don't know how to get her to put more positive energy into life. I am giving her a vitamin supplement with iron, as I wondered if she could be anaemic, but it doesn't seem to have made any difference.

I veer wildly between finding it infuriating and then feeling guilty for being sharp with her about it.

Yesterday she was playing happily with dh in the living room, dancing around the room, and then I came in and asked how she was. At that point she collapsed in a chair making little whiny noises and refused to speak. Then she said she was tired.

Any ideas? It honestly makes me want to shake her. It is just so energy sapping and prevents anyone else from having a good time. I know I must sound really horrible but it is the honest truth of how I'm feeling at the moment and I don't know what to do about that, or what to do about her. Helpppppp....

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

RealityIsHungover · 06/12/2009 17:40

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn

CarGirl · 06/12/2009 17:47

As it seems to be mainly for your benefit perhaps she gets lots of attention (if tho often negative) for that type of behaviour.

Perhaps try ignoring the drama and breezily carry on.

Put shoes on with no socks etc "that's a shame your feet will be cold with no socks on" type of thing.

Original poster

Aranea · 06/12/2009 18:03

I agree that it sounds as though she is doing it for attention, but I generally do just ignore or walk away as I find it so irritating that I can't engage with it!

I think she might be dyspraxic, and the OT tells me she has low muscle tone, which I suppose might partly account for it (I think it might account for her finding it hard to put on socks etc) but I don't think that's the whole story. It feels more like a negative state of mind, and that's what's really sapping and infuriating.

OP posts:

Original poster

Aranea · 06/12/2009 18:04

I think maybe I will take her to the GP. At least then I'll be able to absolve myself of some of the guilt...

OP posts:

CarGirl · 06/12/2009 18:18

I take it she's started reception? They do get very tired by the end of each term.....

Can you dangle a carrot and build up her confidence with what she can do?

Absolving guilt a good tactic!

Original poster

Aranea · 06/12/2009 18:26

Yes, she's in reception. And actually she's just got over a very lingering cold & temperature, so maybe she is feeling a bit low. It's just that the general tone is not out of character for her iyswim.

What's a bit unappealing is the way she will perk up if offered a pressie or a biscuit or something.

I am horrible.

OP posts:

MollieO · 06/12/2009 18:28

Sounds like end of term tiredness to me. Ds (5) is the same at the moment and he usually has boundless energy. Last night he was in bed asleep by 6.15pm and didn't wake up until 8am. He usually is in bed and asleep by 8pm weekdays (a bit earlier at the weekends) and awake by 6.30am.

alexw · 06/12/2009 18:48

Aranea this sounds exactly like my dd who will be 5 on 28th. I think mine has got into a habit of saying this when she really means she's bored or would rather be doing something else. However, lately she has also been alternating 'I'm tired' with 'I'm hungry' even when she's just said she can't finish her dinner as she's full... Grr I am trying to put it down to end of term general knackeredness and a growth spurt along with being 5. You are not alone. Now, repeat the mantra 'it's just a phase' ... and breathe.

CarGirl · 06/12/2009 18:53

My youngest was 4 in August, be thankful yours moans about being tired. The more tired dd4 gets the naughtier she becomes, she's drawn on the dining chairs(!), hid her packed lunc so she could get a free school lunch, pilfers loads from the classroom.

I'm constantly having to be one step ahead of her

Original poster

Aranea · 06/12/2009 19:33

I don't know about end of term tiredness. I hope you're right, but it seems to be more of a constant theme than that.

alexw - now that does sound like the same sort of thing. I was thinking about it, and she has also got into the habit of saying, 'I don't like it' about food, when actually she has always been a really good eater and will eat pretty much anything. I think what she actually means is that she isn't feeling like eating. It is good to know that I'm not alone. Still hard to believe it's a phase rather than a character defect!

Have you found any way of dealing with it that works?

CarGirl, I'm not sure I would find that worse actually - it sounds very trying but I think I deal with proper bad behaviour better than whingey lacklustreness (don't think that's a word, but you know what I mean).

The floppity negativity just pushes some button in me and sends my blood pressure sky-high.

OP posts:

alexw · 06/12/2009 19:50

As hard as it is I always try to remind myself she is not doing it to wind me up (despite the fact that it drives me to drink crazy. I think it is something easy to say which gets a reaction albeit negative. The bouncing straight back if chocolate or something similar is in the vicinity is also very frustrating but reassures me it's just something she's got into the habit of saying. Basically I think my dd is being lazy with her communication.Try to stay positive and know you're not alone.

CarGirl · 06/12/2009 20:01

dd4 just pushes our buttons by not do anything we ask, she thinks it is all very funny! Oh and she doesn't think doing what she wants is naughty .

I think she was sent to rid me of all broodiness despite the fact she is completely adorable!

alexw · 08/12/2009 13:21

Aranea how's it going? Have banned tv here for this week - it seems to have made an improvement in terms of the 'I'm tired' whinge. Maybe the box was sapping her energy (not that she watched that much).

Original poster

Aranea · 08/12/2009 20:13

Well, I'm tentatively feeling positive (and a bit guilty actually) - I think part of it might have been post-viral fatigue, as she has just been ill and off school for a week. After a couple of days back at school she seems a bit bouncier. Also I have been trying to give her lots of cuddles when she's cheerful in the hope that she won't think she needs to act pathetic in order to get a cuddle.

She hardly watches any TV usually, but has been watching quite bit while she's been at home ill, so maybe that was making a difference too. Interesting.

OP posts:

Flip