toddler really playing up since baby arrived...driving me mad!

[biggernow]

hello
my dd was born 3 weeks ago and my 27 month old ds has been very mixed in his reaction. Of course I was expecting some kind of reaction- he's a toddler, he is used to exclusive attention etc etc and I have read all the standard advice on dealing with introductions/feeding baby etc.

but I am so sleep deprived from newborns antics, I am really upset by his behaviour. We have good moments when things are fine, and he is very gentle towards dd and i think things will be ok- then we have horrendous times- he had already had 4 mega tantrums over very silly things this morning and his previously calm bedtimes have turned into screamathons. I am finding it so distressing, love him so dearly but he is driving me round the bend.

Any tips advice or words of comfort very welcome....haven't had enough sleep to see wood for trees......

Thanks

my son was three when i had twins and i found that asking him to help me made him feel wanted useful and industrious. i am a firm believer that boys like being industrious.

thngs like " please can you pass me the nappies, what would i do without you whilst daddy is at work....can you please get me the wipes, you are such a good boy, such a big help."

etc
etc

i also went out of my way to make him feel special and not feel jealous, i didn't preen all over the babies and when they cried i would dramatically say things like " oh arn't they noisy babies, you were such a good baby" ...you get the picture.

also i let him stay up late one night a week and we would watch crap telly and eat shit food.

let him get even more involved...sit him at the back of your settee and put babay on his knee...allow him to feed baby...with either expressed milk or water/formula. Just drop silly things in the conversations when babies are crying,like'oooh arent they a nuisance'. Try not to fuss them in front of him until alll the tantrums stop. DS will probably feel very insecure with all the fuss over the twins...did anyone give him a present just for him,when the babies were born.

I always give a present to the first born when there is a new arrival..because they see so many gifts for the new baby. Did you get him a present to give to the babies to help him share.

sorry OP got the 2 posts mixed up,just realised you didnt have twins...sorry...but i would still apply the same things. Best of luck.

I agree with custardo wholeheartedly. it worked for me too