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Behaviour/development

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On discovering your child's personality through their speech and language

2 replies

Juillet · 18/11/2009 21:38

It occurred to me today that I have been waiting for ds2 to talk, in order better to understand what makes him tick. I've been looking forward to discovering what he is like - because even though he communicates in various ways, he is still esssentially an unknown quantity without the ability to express his thoughts. Feelings is easy - cry, smile, laugh - but thoughts is another issue.

Today he spoke clearly for almost the first time, in a proper sentence and with a proper premise, ie he was playing a little game and told me repeatedly as he skipped along, 'I'm a monster! I'm a monster!'

The weirdest thing (apart from hearing him say 'I'm' about himself instead of his name!) was that it felt foreign to me - it was as though this child was suddenly almost a stranger to me. He is 2 and a half and has been slow at developing speech, but until now I assumed he would think a certain way, and speak in a certain way, and he doesn't - and now I'm worried in case I don't like him after all that!

I've had no problem bonding and feeling utter incomparable love for him up to now, but was that all based on my own construct rather than the boy himself?

Help.

OP posts:
cory · 18/11/2009 21:49

The boy himself will change and develop many times before he is grown up- offering you new opportunities to fall in love again. It feels a bit strange but there is nothing to say you won't come to love this new boy as much as the non-speaking one you had. I have come to love my teenager , though she is quite different from the little girl I had.

Juillet · 18/11/2009 21:51

Thankyou

I ahdn't realised before I had kids that you don't just love and like them all the time. I spent years not really getting on with ds1 until recently when he hit the crucial age of 6 and I found myself able to relate to him suddenly...maybe they will take turns being easy to understand! Paradoxically though as it's the understanding of ds2 which has caused me to question who he is and what he's doing where my familiar baby used to be!!

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