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Upset 7 yr old dd - any advice?

5 replies

k2805 · 16/11/2009 20:57

Hello

I am new here and probably sound like a babbling idiot but here we go...

My 7 yr old dd developed a kind of tic a few weeks ago - lots of blinking, swallowing, making sounds with her mouth and repeating the last sounds of the word she has just said. She has no front teeth at the mo and we put it mainly down to that feeling a bit strange, and we have been ignoring it in the hope that it will go away by itself.

But tonight, before bed, she just got really upset saying that people often don't want to play the same game at school as her, or they change the game without telling her, or they say she can't run fast enough to play with them, or that the game is only for so many people etc.. she even said that as she was trying to explain a game to others they just walked away before she was finished. She has also just told me that a while ago she had noone to play with and spent the playtime crying, so the teacher asked another girl to make it her "duty" to play with her when she was alone; it now turns out that my dd has to do exactly what this other kid says, or she won't play.

Now I am wondering if this is perhaps the cause of said tic! It was very severe when she was telling me. She had a few problems settling into school at the beginning and at one time was thought to have adhd. However, she has grown out of that and is doing really well during lesson time at school. She can be a bit eccentric she loves to read, and watch documentaries so can sometimes be a bit of a know it all, but she is very sweet and kind and would never been mean to anyone. Do you think she is a pushover and that's why this is happening? Am I overreacting and its just kids?

I told her I would speak to her teacher to just keep an eye on things at playtime, and then after a bit of thought went back and told her she was the best kid ever and not to let anyone be mean to her, to stand up for herself and give as good as she gets. But what should I be telling her?

Sorry for the ramble, but if anyone has advice, please let me know.

OP posts:
CheeryCherry · 16/11/2009 21:06

Poor little girl. Have no decent advice but would arrange for a chat with her teacher - without DD - and ask if anything has been noticed at school. Make sure they keep a close eye out, they can easily bring up the topic of friendship/caring/kindness in class.
Think you are doing the right thing, keep reassuring her, its good to be different, remind her of all her best qualities, say over and over again how much she is loved. Its so hard when they go through an unconfident phase.
Can you invite a friend or two over, or take her and a pal to the cinema/park, somewhere where she can relax a bit? Sorry if I am rambling too, good luck with it all.

verytellytubby · 16/11/2009 21:28

Feel for her (and you). Make an appointment with her teacher. Invite a few girls back for a playdate.

I'm finding girls horrible in year 3. My DD (7) is having a bit of tough time with a clique of girls in her class. She's a really shy, gentle little girl.

k2805 · 16/11/2009 21:30

Thankyou cheerycherry. We do have kids over for tea and she seems to get on fine then. Will def speak to her teacher tomorrow and see what she says, and whether she has noticed the tic aswell. Breaks my heart to see her upset, but I also know that some of her games can be a bit strange and a bit boring for other kids, while others are brilliant. Just trying to work out what advice to give her to help her deal with it in the moment. But thanks, nice to know there are people out there!

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BikiniBottom · 16/11/2009 21:31

Year 3 is renowned for being difficult for girls. I think you should def arrange a meeting with her teacher, they should be able to help and should be used to this as well.

k2805 · 16/11/2009 22:01

Thank you all. Didn't realise that about Yr 3 but it makes sense. Will def speak to teacher tomorrow. Hopefully, am just being crazy overprotective mum and its something everyone goes through. Can't bear to see her so upset though.

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