1 year old does not understand me

[firsttimer08]

We have only just started recognising that my 1 year old boy is not babbling much. He says 'dada' or 'tata' occasionally but mostly screams to communicate. He also does not understand us, if I ask him "bring your bottle" or "where is the duck", he just simply ignores us and gets on with his playing. He will only respond to his name or for that matter anything, if we are very loud. He does occasionally point to things, like the other day at the tube station he was pointing at the train. He is very loving, blows kisses, likes to hug us etc. His motor skills are fine and he has been walking for few weeks now.

I am not sure if there is anything wrong with his hearing because he can always very clearly hear the door bell or when the door shuts. He always rushes to see who it is. He does not however immitate any sounds we make.

Is it hearing loss/speech delay or do any of these signs seem similar to autism? I would be grateful if you could share your experiences with me.

Hi, firsttimer08, my DS3 is 19 months and has only shown signs of comprehension in the last month or 2, so do not think your LO sounds unusual in that respect. They do seem to live in their own little universe for a good while.
It is important that he hears door bells etc, also that he shows social behaviour like blowing kisses.
DS3 did/does babble quite a bit though, but has no real comprehensible words. If you have concerns I would certainly discuss them with your HV or GP. Did your DS have newborn hearing screening done?

Also bear in mind that all children are different: my DS1 was v quick with all his milestones, had definete "words" at 14-15 months, DS2 was much much more laid back in everything but is absolutely fine (he is now 5).

Autism as far as I know cannot be diagnosed at such a young age and I do not think that what you are describing sounds much like something that would make me suspect ASD (I am no specialist, humble GP only).

HTH a bit but like I said seek further help if you continue to be worried.

Thank you ! Its great getting a GP's opinion and it makes me feel a little less worried. DS did have the hearing screening, which turned out fine. I will probably arrange to see my HV, but as you said they will probably say that it is too early to be worried. I just don't want to delay things too much, because it seems the earlier any problems are spotted, the less difficult it will be to rectify/overcome them.

Pointing is usually a sign that there is no ASD present. And FWIW, my ds1 was a very early talker and he has had more problems in school than any of my others who were much later.

my dt's are 20 months and it is only in the past week that my ds has started to babble and listen and respond when I ask him to do things. He can only say a couple of words (ta, dada, mama, wasat - whats that) whereas my dd has always been fairly vocal in terms of babbling and has understood me for quite a while. I have a HV coming to see me soon who specialises in speech development.

If I were you I really wouldnt worry just yet, your DS is still very young but if you are concerned too much contact your HV x

The trouble is that when you have a 1 year old they can be 12 months and just walking or 23 months and following simple instruction and more toddler than baby.

He is 12.5 months so just walking and borderline baby rather than borderline toddler. As you say all babies are different, but it is good to know that he is not unsual in that he does not understand /respond.

We just visited the GP this morning and she has referred us for a hearing test just to satisfy our concerns. However, she said it is rather unusual for a baby to have passed the hearing test at birth, to develop hearing loss later on. Since the test will take a few months to take place, once we have cleared that side, we may consider going for speech and language therapy. My baby's nursery may be able to arrange some help from the local learning trust once he is over 18 months. In the meantime I guess we can just wait and see what happens.

A few month ago, I remember he was babbling a lot and making all sorts of sounds. It is only recently, I feel that he has cut down in some ways. I wonder if that is because he is focusing on his motor skills and walking around a lot more. I notice he babbles a lot to himself at night time or when its quiet. Is that normal?

Is it normal for babies to scream? When he gets excited, he uses screaming to communicate.

I am just worried about autism, as I have read that sometimes babies can be perfectly normal up to 1 year or age, but then regress after that.

My dd was a great babbler up to about 12 months, and then she just stopped. She would say 'this' and point if she wanted something, but very little else. I was worried as her 2 brothers were very verbal at that age. Eventually we took her for speech therapy, the therapist wasn't that concerned, told me to sing nursery rhymes with her (which she loved), ask her lots of questions and give her plenty of time to answer.

By 2 she was back on track, and now at 5 she is such a chatterbox, very articulate, and still loves singing.

Try not to worry

BTW the screaming is perfectly normal, my 3 all did.

My ds is 20 months and although babbles he has no discernible words yet and it does worry me but deep down I know that he's just doing things in his own time. He walked at 13 months, but until then didn't crawl or really roll, just sat there playing and eating tons of food! He didn't point till 18 months either and I've always felt like he's kept me waiting with all the milestones! His comprehension is good though and I think that when they are this young they focus so much on what they are doing that they don't necessarily always work on their speech. Some children are more physical than others and some are more verbal - mine is particularly physical so I can see that he's spending more time on this side of things at the mo. Maybe your ds is the same?

I think if your ds responds to his name and points then they are all the right signs and there are plenty of babies who don't speak until after 2. I would just make sure you carry on talking to him as much as possible and read to him, sing songs etc. Mine still makes screaming, grumbling noises if he doesn't get what he wants at precisely the time he wants it, but he's always done that. It would be great if he hurried up with some words, but I know they are on the way.

I hope that helps.

Oh, good, you were taken seriously at your GP's and your LO has been referred.

Yes, a lot lot kids will develop in stops and starts: more verbal/social develops when they do not do much physically, more physical develops when nothing much happens on the communication front.

DS3 shouts, stretches hand in direction of what he wants and opens and closes finger rapidly to indicate he wants something.
He used to shout "maMA" (with stress on 2nd syllable like French "Maman" ) which did not mean "mummy " but meant "I want something and I want it now".
So, yes, shouting quite normal.

Trust your instincts about your child, mum does very oftern know best, but at the same time don't convince yourself unnecessarily there is something wrong.

Good luck with the hearing test.

Just to give an update. We had the hearing test and all is ok there. DH tells me to stop worrying and just let things be. So I am going to give DS a few more months now to get his act together He is babbling a bit more and says 'ooo' or 'ka' everytime he wants me to give him something. He still does not really understand us at all, but as some of the posters have suggested their DCs did no start understanding at this age either.

Maybe he is just delayed in these developments as he has only now started pointing on a very regular basis (at about 13 months) and also tries to communicate with the ooo, ka sounds. He has stopped (for now, fingers crossed), using screaming to communicate with us.

Lets see how it goes.

Thanks for all your support.

Great to hear an update firsttimer. I hope all goes well. The I CAN website has some good stuff about helping communication, you might find it useful to have a look.

Thanks very much for the website. It looks very helpful !

Hello...What are the update about ur son plz?

@firsttimer08 I know this was years ago but experiencing the same now. Would love an update x

Pleased to say my son who is now 15 year old was just a late talker and late in developing his cognitive understanding. He is doing v well in school, a talented musician and chess player too! I believe the internet and people around us tend to worry us too much, try to enjoy your child. I spent so much time over worrying for nothing.

How lovely to see this, he sounds great!

I replied on this thread under a different name, astonished to see it was 15 years ago!! Wow time has flown!