How much tv does your toddler/preschooler watch-honestly!

[SuperAmoo]

My DD1 watches so much tv and I'm always reading about how watching more than two hours of tv per day is bad. But the fact is after being out at preschool or a friend's or the park etc in the morning, she watches tv for the rest of the day because she's too tired to do anything else, even play on her own. Does anyone else have this problem?

We always thought we watched too much tv, and it fairly dominates our tiny flat. It doesn't help that both dh and I work in television, so it's our lifestyle, really. I also grew up in a media household, so the news was always watched. As a result our tv often gets turned on 1st thing in the morning for either news headlines or ceebeebies. It's usually turned off at 10 am and back on at lunchtime and then 5pm while dinner's getting ready, and rarely turned off after that. Our DD is 22 months old and is starting to demand "telly on" but I try not to cave in. It's only ceebeebies during the day, and she's learned so much from it - songs, shapes, sign language! We do lots together, she goes to playgroups and nursery 2 days a week. She can deffo play on her own but still hangs off me a bit when I'm trying to cook, so it's times like that that Peppa Pig is switched on.

I'm cutting down on news during the day, as she's starting to understand a fair bit, but she can recognise Obama and cheers when she sees him! The only time I regret having telly on is mealtimes when dd glazes over rather than pay attention to her dinner, so I have to work on that.

Ds (2.7) watches half an hour of Milkshake cartoons occasionally, usually Thomas or Peppa Pig while he's having his breakfast. Dd (14 weeks) likes to stare at the bright lights if it's on, but doesn't actively "watch" obviously.

Apart from the occasional breakfast cartoon, the telly stays off all day. I only put it on after 8pm when the kids are in bed, and then it tends to stay on most of the evening while I'm knitting.

I'm not a fan of TV for small children, and there was never one in the house while I was growing up. Ds prefers to potter in the garden, or play with his trains or building blocks. He also spends ages looking at books, so I'd rather encourage that.

tv hardly ever on now. if it is, it's to watch a much loved dvd or something that we've recorded. never watch tv during mealtimes.

We have never had a telly but have access to iPlayer and DVDs on the computer. During the week my kids (Six, five and 2 and a baby) only watch 20 mins before bath as an incentive (or bribe!) for tidy-up time. Tends to be an episode of something like Raven on iPlayer.
They also often watch a film on Sunday afternoon. But there are exceptions when I will use a dvd when everything is about to kick off.
We were really strict with DS1 when he was tiny - five minutes of Beatrix Potter if he was lucky - but inevitably DS3 watches stuff now that the older ones are interested in - Star Wars etc.
DP and I both grew up without telly and felt like we stuck out a bit - not knowing what everyone was talking about at school so we were quite keen that ours could watch something rather than nothing but quite like the fact they actively choose what to watch rather than just sticking the telly on.

My just two year old can put postman pat and thomas dvds on herself now...

And I think they are great. We talk about what they are doing, she tells me if they are sad and will tell me they are happy again. She can talk to her friend about all the engines.....

I feel no guilt about her watching TV when I am needing to do something like cook dinner etc.

ALso we enjoy watching Home Improvement though she tends to play around while we watch [usually after dinner when we are all tired!].

She also like Cbeebees on the laptop

Quite a bit but she she only needs 10 hours sleep a day so that is 14 hours for activity. So, probably an hour in the mornings before pre-school, 30-45 mins when she gets home about 1ish and an hour after tea before bath,stories and bed. So, even if that is 2-3 hours she still has 11 hours of playing, stories, baking, helping me, pre-school, going to the park, going to friends, drawing, painting, etc, etc,etc.

She quite often plays along with the telly and loves all the disney films - she has an amazing imagination and acts out her favourite scences all the time. I often feel guilty but if I analyse why, its probably threads like these! It doesn't do her any harm at all.

We don't have a TV, just iPlayer/4OD or DVD's. DS is 13 months, he likes to watch part of the odd episode of Masterchef if he happens to be snuggling with me but otherwise I don't like him watching the screens.

You don't actually have to entertain your children all the time wiht a choice of TV or activities though. They can just pootle around with their toys for the afternoon. They need to learn how to amuse themselves too.

DS1 watched hardly any at all. Still watches very little really.

DS2 (almost 2) watches FAR too much in comparison. Seems to be quite obsessed. Actually, at the moment he has little interest in anything else- I think it is a phase though. I hope!(!)

I think 2hrs tops is okay. Half hr - 1hr in the morning, half hr - 1hr at the end of the day. I agree with Romanarama - our children can wander around a bit and amuse themselves too.

• which is what my two are doing right now upstairs in their bedroom.

My DS1 watched quite a bit - we don't get kids tv here so it's all DVDs. I remember feeling terribly guilty but was a single Mum and it was the only way I could just have a moment to myself.

Now I have a decent DP, and DS2 watches tons of DVDs - he can sit through half of Finding Nemo before anyone else is up in the morning, and I just can't be a horsey for all that time. We also do lot of long car journeys and our in car DVd player is the only thing that gets us through them. I agree with MWFF - I long for the quiet reading but it just won't happen for a few years yet. In the meantime, DS1 is now 9, an avid reader and sportsman with plenty of friends and is non the worse for a diet of Lion King and Popeye for three or four years.

It's the quality not the quantity, I think. When we moved to Bangkok we had Cartoon network on cable, and the change in DS1's behaviour was almost instantaneous. CBeebies DVds seem to give DS2 quite a bit of stimulation and we talk things through as he watches so it's not like he's locked away somewhere and ignored.
WorstWitch - are you for real, do you all sit around and have quiet reading time?! How old are your kids?!
Must go, DS2 is on a tv ban so is drawing pictures of charlie and Lola on his legs.

I've never let my DD watch any TV at all. Reading this I'm beginning to realise how unusual that is. I hope she doesn't rebel against it and become a total telly addict when she's older.

I wonder - genuinely, and non-confrontationally(!) - why you don't 'let' her?

I never watched much myself & had always been anti TV on principle, influenced partly by sister with son 4 years older than mine, and having read about how it interferes with talking, literacy. I had rather nasty arguments with partner about it when pregnant in anticipation, he being somewhat of a telly addict. Now (ds is 2.1) I have been won over by quality of much of cbeebies (far from hindering speech, son's favourite phrase is now "catch the bus/train?" etc. as in "catch the ninkynonk!") and I think my nephew probably missed out - he is not particularly literate for his age, despite his strict parents! That said of course there are limits. It varies but I'd say ds watches average 1 hr daily, usually when I need a break.

I dont watch TV (live abroad-donT understand!) so the TV is rarely on. DD is 3.1 and most days doesnt watch any but about 3 times a week shell watch about an hour in the morning.
HAve to say, as she gets older it gets easier to get her to watch less. NOw her concentration span is high so I dont really need to put it on because Im worn out. When she was 2.1 she`d watch a bit more
I am worried about the computer though. I am addicted!

Interesting. All I can say to the "don't allow it" folks is beware (in a really good way mind you).

DH was raised by the tv and can sing adverts from the 70's which baffles me ('specially as he had a nanny).

I am the oldest of six kids and were were allowed 2 hours total amongst us. This meant we could EITHER watch a film or TV shows and we had to decide amongst ourselves which it would be. When we did watch a show we were not allowed to watch network TV (only public access stuff) so no adverts.

I rather like that approach. The downside (and the part to beware) is the sheer damage kids can do. We did not do little things like drawing on the walls. We put on helmets and jumped off the house (or down the stairs). We lit the mattresses on fire. We sprinkled 50lbs of flour on the kitchen floor and filled the room with 3 inches of water. My mother's criteria for parental intervention became heavy bleeding.

For a long time there my mother had more grey hair than her mother.

DS is 3.3 years/ DD 8 months.

I think left to his own devices DS would watch telly all day.

I don't have TV on for me at all during the day but might watch something at lunchtime on iplayer whilst DD kips and DS watches telly but I wouldn't have it on as background noise. DS only watches SKy+'d stuff and we pick together what to record - so things like tikabilla/numberjacks but he also loves Wonder Pets at the moment

DD and DS spend two full days at nursery when I work so on nursery days, we get back around 5.30/45. Bath is at 6.30 so it's tv on til then. DS will though get up and turn it off when a programme I tell him is the last, finishes

On our days at home, we have a "no telly before lunch" rule, so none in the morning. He does two mornings at pre-school and will potter round with me after that whilst I get lunch/feed dd and put her down for nap. He'll then have about an hour/hour and half after we've had our lunch together (I then get a sit down to surf the net/make calls in peace/watch iplayer). Once DD gets up the TV goes off again. The concept of DS "playing quietly" in his room for that down time is absolutely alien in our house . He gave up his nap at lunchtime at 2.3years when I was pregnant so this is my sanity time still.

We are hardly ever in the house so out with friends, at the park etc etc and the tv can go on again after tea so about 5.30/40pm.

At weekends, the same rules apply.

If the weather is rubbish and in DD's early days I'd often cave in mid morning for a half hour or so but now she's bigger I don't.

DS is hilarious at weekends- if DH comes in and turns the TV on for some sporting event or something he says "Mummy says no TV before lunch" and he'll switch it off .

I don't agree with having it on in the background mainly because tbh I find the noise on top of kids noise/the washing machine and every friggin' appliance in my kitchen beeping at me for attention just a wee bit too much ! I did watch lots of telly as a child and as an adult love a good nnight in front of the box but have never been a fan of just "having it on " for the sake of it. I also love to read....no harm in it in doses in my opinion

We're much like JenMc - don't have a tv but ds1 2.7 watches DVD or iplayer more or less on demand - goes through phases of up to about 40 mins a day for a few dyays then nothing for a few days. DS2 9months and not bothered.

Those who said kids don't need activities all the time are perfectly right. They'll pootle for a bit, help/play in line with a (little) bit of housework etc. Especially if that's what they've always been expected to do.

It really depends on the day. Some days I am total supermom and we never turn it on, read a billion books, and play outside for hours before having a lovely organic lunch. Then there are the days when DS and I are sick/cranky/tired/it's raining etc., and I chuck a bag of "fruit" snacks at him and let him rewind Elmo as many times as he wants.

As long as you have a balance I think it's ok. We don't have cable so we don't get any channels; we just watch DVDs. So at least there are no commercials and I can preview what he watches. Mostly it's Thomas the Train or Sesame Street.

Oh I'm so glad to happen upon this thread. My DD doesn't watch any TV and now she's getting older ( 19 months ) I do wonder if she's missing out on cultural referances as it were with her friends.... People are always asking her things like if she likes ITNG and Cbeebies and I'm always embarssed by the fact she hasn't got a clue...

DS2 is 20 months old. He watches no television (it's in the "nice" reception room where kids are not allowed), but can watch the occasional Sesame Street podcast (each lasts about 5 minutes) several times a week.

Thought about missing the cultural reference thing, but I don't think toddlers are big into peer pressure yet.

Hmmm... I think it's more me that feels the pressure, I try not to mention the fact that we don't have the TV on as fellow parents seem to think that I'm weird. I wouldn't mind but it's not like I'm madly anti Tv it's just I think I have many years of watching her crap, lets put it off for as longs as possible!

it depends where you live. Kids watch loads of telly in scandinavia. Its not seen as a problem there at all.

As much Timmy Time as required for DS2!

At 16 months DS has hardly watched any TV. He's had a tummy bug for the last couple of days and yesterday we put on a Postman Pat DVD and he didn't know what to do. He would watch for a couple of minutes and then want to be off climbing and walking around.
How this might change when no.2 arrives in April will be interesting!

Paolosgirl, or looking at it the other way, why would I want her to watch it? She's never asked to watch it, so why would I put it on when there are lots of other fun, more interactive things that I could do with her?

I agree with mothershipcalling, I've got plenty of years ahead of me of her actively wanting to watch telly and asking for it! Until she's asking for it, I'm happy for it to be off.