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Original poster

4 month old who just screams....constantly!

50 replies

dizzymama · 06/06/2005 09:37

Well ok, maybe that is a bit of an exageration (know I've spelt that wrong!) but she is spending the vast majority of her days crying. I have a feeling it's just that she wants to be picked up all the time as she stops as soon as I do. The problem is that I can't pick her up all the time, I have stuff to do but at the moment I feel really cruel leaving her to cry. It'sgot to the stage where I have to leave all the household work till my DH comes back from work, then he has her and I iron/ wash up / hoover etc. It's killing me, I'm knackered! She's upstairs in her cot having a 'sleep' at the moment (i.e. she's been bawling for 15 minutes)

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Lonelymum · 06/06/2005 09:41

Gosh this brings back memories! You might be right and she just wants continual cuddling. It can be very wearing especially if you want to get on with something else like going to the loo or making yourself a drink.

Is anyone else nearby who could hold your baby for you for a while? At that age, they don't mind who holds them I find.

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 09:52

I do have friends and family near by LM but Dad is disabled and DH's parents and my Mum work full time. Friends are very good with her but always feel guilty as they all have children the same age! Trying to leave her at the moment in the hope she'll realise crying doesn't =picking up.

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moondog · 06/06/2005 09:54

Have you tried a little bouncy chair dizzymama? Turned my nose up at them with dd,but with ds,they were a Godsend. Also try putting her in front of the washing machine/tumble dryer/Hoover,or put her in her pram to watch the clouds and trees if you have a garden Ds regularly packed off to the patio in his playpen!

Lonelymum · 06/06/2005 09:54

Is she your first?

starlover · 06/06/2005 09:55

does she have a baby gym or anything that keeps her interested?

i have to admit, i put ds (same age) in front of the tv for company if i am off doing stuff!

also, if he is being a bit whingey i sit him in his bouncy chair and take him with me into the kitchen or whereve i'll be while i'm doing stuff so that he can still see me

last resort would be a sling perhaps? so that you can carry her but still get on with stuff

Lonelymum · 06/06/2005 09:56

Yes agree about the bouncy chair if you haven't got one. All four of mine loved it. I found they reached an age when they couldn't yet sit up by themselves but nevertheless wanted to be upright. You can sit them in the chair and let them watch whatever you are doing.

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 09:56

Yes she's first LM - feel a bit out of my depth.
Moondog, have tried the chair, the play mat, the swing, the garden...... all work for 5 minutes then the novelty wears off and she realises she's not being held.

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starlover · 06/06/2005 09:58

well... they do have quite short attention spans.. not sure though cos DS will happily sit in front of tv for 20 mins at a time

tbh if you're sure there is nothing wrong with her, she's been fed, changed etc... then there is nothing wrong with leaving her to cry for a few minutes (not talking hours here.. just a little while) if you need to do stuff...

moondog · 06/06/2005 09:59

dm,she may not be well,in which case she needs you
Looking back,this has been the case a lot when mine have been like this If it's any consolation,I've found clingy babies tend to make more independent toddlers Seriously!!!
It will pass.

Lonelymum · 06/06/2005 09:59

It is hard isn't it? It doesn't last forever though. When they start sitting up and then crawling and then walking (God help us!) they do find things to interest themselves more so you are not in demand quite so much. I used to spend days sittig holding the baby and feeling very frustrated that I couldn't do anything else but it doesn't last forever.

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 10:00

I have tried the baby bjorn type carrier we have starlover, just found it really hard to reach around her to do stuff! She's a big baby so this may be the reason? Don't want her to get used to having her own way all the time by picking her up on demand, is it too early to do that? Does she understand yet?

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moondog · 06/06/2005 10:00

Agree with starlover.You can leave them for a few minutes I'm a lot more ruthless with my second Bet lonelymum is a boot camp instructor with her fourth!

Lonelymum · 06/06/2005 10:02

Well he has been moaning around me for the last ten minutes or so Moondog and is now rocking the chair for me! helpppppppppppppp

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 10:03

Thanks ladies, it does help to know this isn't forever! Moondog, I'm holding tight to the hope she'll be a great toddler I'll feel so bad if she isn't well but I really think she's ok, Mum's instinct if you like.

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moondog · 06/06/2005 10:06

Dm,sometimes I don't think it's illness,rather felling a bit low and under the weather. Yes,she'll be great Both my sister's kids were high maintenence prima donnas! They're lovely now though

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 10:07

She is known as the little diva baby in our house!!!

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bumpylump · 06/06/2005 11:04

oh Dizzymama, I have a male diva only 6 wks but I know exactly what you mean.

Had a nice Sunday dinner at my Nans yesterday and he screamed for 2 hours, had to make an embarassed exit in the end as he upset her hearing aid as she was getting feedback

Bought a baby swing at the weekend and it is a godsend, that with the free CD to soothe babies that is free in this months "Mother & Baby" magazine is brilliant!

I finally have peace now for 5 mins to call my Nan and apologise.

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 11:24

Off to buy Mother and Baby I go.....
Loving the name bumpylump! Made me smile

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gossifer · 06/06/2005 11:30

dizzymama, my ds is 16 weeks and i totally know where you are, i really think they can see so much more of the world but not quite for themselves (i.e. they cannot sit up, ds wants to be part of whats going on all the time) i find it hard and get so little done in comparison to 2 weeks ago, have flu too! i think once they start to sit things willchange!
thinking of you

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 11:32

Thanks gossifer, it's a bit like trying to reinvent the wheel sixteen times a day isn't it! What works once doesn't the second time You know it's bad when you actually think you've had a productive day if you've done the washing up!

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gossifer · 06/06/2005 11:40

washing up!!!!! whats that? no, seriously, i do feel that i just suss him out and then its all different, but of course he's jusy changing every day. i think you should not give yourself a hard time about the housework, leave it, this is not going to last forever, also you'll wear yourself out and get ill ( like me), look after yourself as much as you can. when your dh comes home run yourslef a bath and have a bit of me time, xxxxx

Original poster
dizzymama · 06/06/2005 12:03

Sad to hear you're not well gossifer thanks for advice,that bath sounds nice. Get well soon xx

OP posts:
gossifer · 06/06/2005 12:12

thankyou

brodiesmummy · 06/06/2005 12:38

It does end, my gorgeous ds screamed most of the time till he was 5 1/2 months(still cried when picked up),although he did have colic.It's weird now he's 6 months+ he's a different baby-smiles cuddles and only cries now to let me know somethings wrong.It does drive you bonkers though doesn't it!!!

Sax · 06/06/2005 12:44

have you taken those lemsips or day nurse gossifer - how are you doing??