16mth old dd doesn't want anything to do with dad when mum around

[Sheen4272]

My dd becomes clingy when I am around, she will not give her dad a cuddle and if he tries to pick her up she throws a tantrum and cries. If I'm not there she's fine. She barely acknowledges him when he comes home from work or if he gets her out of her cot in the morning and I am in the house. She's happy for him to give breakfast and bottle at night but rarely any cuddles. This is very upsetting for dh. Any ideas on how to deal with this?

My DS went though a real phase of doing this too. He was a bit older, (2years ish I think), but otherwise it sounds very similar. We went to legoland on fathers day and DS was adamant he did not want to ride any rides with daddy, only with me. My DH and I tried being quite low key about it with DS and not creating a big reaction every time he 'rejected' daddy. We just said 'that's a shame, poor daddy' and moved on. I talked about daddy lots when he was at work and said lots of good things about daddy and how much he loves us etc. I didn't press DS to join in, I just wittered on! I also read DS stories with daddy's in. My DH kept on doing routine things like bathtime even tho DS wanted me. My DS is nearly 3 now and adores daddy. I don't know if what we did helped, or if it was just a phase, but I hope that helps a bit.

yes it does, thank you.

my ds is just the same, he 2.5. I sometimes go out at the weekend and let them have some daddy and ds time, they go somewhere fun and once I'm out of the picture its all fine. Does make me feel for dh when he gets home from work and ds rejects him though.

I agree with curlytoes - try not to make a big thing out of it even though its obviously really upsetting to the parent who is being snubbed. Just go with it and it should pass. DS has been through phases like this both for me and his dad - for instance he has always called for me in the night but recently went through a period of rejecting me when I came and calling for daddy instead. He'd start tantrumming if I told him daddy was asleep and couldnt come. Now he doesnt care who comes!