Daughter age 2.10 terrified of pooing, six months on- Please help

[pinkcloud]

Hello, I am new to Mumsnet looking for help with potty training. My daughter is fine with weeing on toilet or potty (started potty training six months ago) but she is totally terrified of pooing, even now in a nappy. She is holding poo in and getting very sore and just does little poes all day in nappies. We can easily get through 6-8 nappies a day. She gets very upset and she often has huge tantrums when we have to change her nappy. We have tried lots of things to try and help her to stop being scared, e.g. potty training books, treats, ignoring the issue, praise etc. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

pinkcloud:

Way to go!!! Daytime nappies gone! And make a big game out of the potty and toilet! We had a timer method to train my boys. Every 20 minutes, the timer went off, and we danced about, jumped up and down, shouting "It's potty time" and made it into a big game. If they did anything whilst on the potty/toilet, they had a sticker or a treat (stickers for wees, a small piece of chocolate for a poo)! I had the only set of twins pooing for chocolate! Everyone thought it totally bizarre, but it worked! Once we got into the 20 minute routine (over a couple of days) we then progressed to every 30/45 mins/hour, and then after that, they were used to saying when they needed to go.

If you consider the timer method worth a try, just be careful that you don't use, say, the oven timer, otherwise your DD may be shouting she needs to go as you are dishing up the dinner!!!!

I think if you relax and make it more joyful, and try not to worry, it will come.

Haven't read all posts but had exactly the same with my DS. Everyone told me not to go abck to nappies as it would send mixed messages, he would be so constipated that we had to use lactulose etc. but he got more and more distressed until one day he needed a poo and I put him on the potty and he became hysterical. At that point I thought what the hell am I doing to my child? I just gave him a massive cuddle and told him it was fine he could have a nappy. I put him in nappies again for a week or so without mentioning it and then asked him if he would like to try his pants again and he said yes. From then on he got it.

I'm not saying they will all do this but you will do more damage stressing over this than just putting your DC back in nappies and not mentioning it for a while. Let them lead a bit.

I'm still horrified when I think back to that time, I certainly will not make the same mistake with DS2.

Good luck.

My 4 year old withholds poo constantly too. She used to ask for her happy to poo into but now just withholds constantly. She is on Movicol to help prevent her getting constipated because thats what kids get when they constantly withhold. At first stage we were advised its better for her to poo than withhold you don't want her constipated so give nappies for pooing. hopefully when it is not an issue and she can just poo without being afraid you can try in the potty again. Best of luck.