High-needs babies support thread - come and join me!

[bean612]

So I love DD (7 months) to distraction and couldn't contemplate life without her, but she is not the the easiest of babies by a very long shot! I've posted on here plenty about her sleep problems (ongoing), but recently been reading Dr Sears about high-needs children and realised DD fits the pattern to a T. I've no wish to pigeonhole her really, but it helped enormously to read that there are plenty of other babies out there who are similar, since I don't know any in real life - everyone else's seem so easy. So if you feel you're in the same boat, please come and moan (and laugh - and cry!). I reckon the best way to deal with the challenge is to share, share, share...

Yes my hubby and I say the same - taht many other babies seem a bit dull and have no personality.

we saw our cranial osteopath today so he has been less whiny so that is always good.
he has hardly eaten anything today which is always a concern to me but I guess he will take what he needs.

Leonie such bad luck to have 2!!! my husband keeps saying there is no way we would have another like this one but now I am not so sure!! he wants 3 in total but if we have nother like him then nooooo way!!hehhee

x

I've got one too! Just wanted to say hi and join but can't type too much as eating my dinner (bad I know!)

I have another 6mo baby who fits all 12 features of that Sears' description. Since she was allowed out of the SCBU, she has demanded to be held quite literally ALL OF THE TIME. She is a terrible sleeper. I can only be on MN because DD is feeding right now. People say that I am mad, making a rod for my back etc. But if I don't cave in to her demands, she becomes so extremely distressed that it is unbearable. She is not like my friends babies, who seem unbelievably placid by comparison. I never get anything done.

I am luckier than some of you in that DD can usually be consoled, and even made laugh, if she is the focus of attention. Slings and pushchairs are okay - just as long as we keep moving. DD only tolerates stopping if she is held and played with constantly. Since she was born, almost everyone who has seen her has remarked on how very alert DD is, much more so than usual. I am worried now that it might be an indicator of ASD tendencies, I know there is a possibility of neurological impairment due to hypoglycaemic brain damage.

In a funny way though - her high needs behaviour has been a salvation, she was an IUGR baby, extremely small and frail after a traumatic birth and subsequent lsevere hypoglycaemia. The transformation we have recorded in photos is incredible - from tiny and sickly to a bouncing, thriving six month old. Unfortunately, the same photos show how I have dramatically deteriorated over the same weeks and months...

apologies for that disjointed post with far too many adjectives, am wrecked and distracted!!!

Thank you Leonie and unMumsnet hugs to you too! It is horrible luck having lightening strike twice. You must be due some good fortune...

IIRC, DD's blood sugar was 1.1, and took several days to get back above 3 but her paediatrician has said he can only hope it was caught on time and we have not yet seen any signs of delayed development, so, fingers crossed, she is just a high-needs baby. I do have ASD in my family as well so I suppose she would be at slightly higher risk anyway, but there is no point in me worrying about that.

We saw our paed for something totally unrelated teh other day and we mentoin the High Needs thing and he said it is all nonesense and all babies need lots of attention etc. Boys are like tornados.

Just out of interest how many of your little ones are boys??

also are any of you Mummies very go go go yourselves?

Thanks
xx

Hi Brewster,

No mine is a DD, so pah to that theory. And I'm very much not a go go go person, more a lazy laid-back, easygoing kind of gal.

More soon. Need to email a request for a repeat prescription for DD's reflux medicine. Yes, that certainly made her first 3 months even more fun before it was diagnosed...

I also have a dd but I suppose I was quite a go go go person but not so much now. Does that count? My friend is very go go go but has the most laid back ds I've ever met. Honestly, he just lies on the floor looking around. Doesn't make a sound. He's 8 months (or was when I last saw him).

Have we abandoned this now? I know there is only so much you can say and of course high needs babies don't leave much time for sitting in front of a computer.

Just having a particularly shitty day and wondered how everyone else is?

Hi sundodger, sorry to hear you're having a crappy day. Want to share? If it's any consolation DD has had a bad cold this week and nights have been appalling (more so than usual!) - waking every hour, and on 2 nights she was awake for 2.5-3 hours grizzling and crying, and NOTHING would get her back off again (well, it did eventually, but took forever). We're BLW her and she had started to do really well in the last couple of weeks but she seems to have totally lost her appetite for solid food and it's as if she never started - she just looks at the food on her highchair tray, doesn't even pick it up. Still, this evening things have started improving so I think she's on the mend. Fingers crossed. But we haven't solved the problem of her waking up repeatedly after being put to bed (and often screaming when she does). Or her screaming if she's left with anyone else but me or DH (I left her with my mum a few days ago and she was hysterical within 10 mins)...