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Behaviour/development

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Is it true about second/subsequent children developing faster to keep up with their older siblings?

12 replies

TheProvincialLady · 12/07/2009 13:49

People keep telling me that DS2 (6 months) is in a hurry to develop quickly so he can do the same things as his older brother (2.10). I wonder whether this is a general truth or whether DS2 just has a different personality to DS1...he is very determined and single minded. He really wants to be able to do physical things. He is already crawling and sitting himself up easily, climbing and then today he has pulled himself up to standing several times. DS1 did all this stuff at a much more leisurely pace.

So do younger siblings do this, or is it - as I always thought - down to the individual child and nothing to do with their place in the family?

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gardeningmum05 · 12/07/2009 13:52

if this was the case how come DS3 isnt quite walking at 18 months, when the others were walking by 14 months.
i think its all to do withe the individual. but saying that DS3s speech is coming on faster than DS2

MuddlingThru · 12/07/2009 14:06

Down to the individual child. DS2 is hitting milestones more slowly than DS1 and DD. But I think some of that is down to being no3. He has to spend a couple of hours a day in the pushchair on the school/playschool runs. When we are home he is less likely to get floor time as I can't be there to watch all the time so spends more time in the highchair. So not necessarily surprising that he is slower to crawl, cruise, etc as he has had far less opportunity to practice. Maybe when he is older having older siblings will be more of a help than a hindrance.

juuule · 12/07/2009 14:21

Down to the individual child ime.

If your younger child was developing slower than the older child there would be some people telling you that it's because the younger child doesn't have to bother as the older child will do it for them.

Probably a bit of truth in both cases plus individual personality.

TheProvincialLady · 12/07/2009 16:11

Yes you're right, if DS2 was less active then people would be finding a reason for that too!

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sweetkitty · 12/07/2009 16:29

DD2 has definitely done things before DD1 ever did, things like drawing a face, riding a bike, walking, talking etc theres only 18 months between them and DD2 thinks she is DD1's twin and won't allow her to do something she cannot do.

It might be that DD2 is just smarter than DD1 I don't know

GrapefruitMoon · 12/07/2009 16:36

It can go either way, ime. I've known a couple of children with older siblings who had delayed speech - I think one of the theories for this is what juuule said...no incentive to communicate

foofi · 12/07/2009 16:44

Not in my house!

mrz · 12/07/2009 17:22

My eldest walked earlier, talked earlier, was dry earlier, learned to read earlier, rode a bike without stabilizers, in fact did most things much earlier than his younger sister.

KnickKnack · 12/07/2009 17:34

I think its down to the individual child too.

Both mine crawled backwards, crawled forwards, walked, ran, all at exactly the same age. The only difference that I can remember was speech. DS was a fluent speaker from a very young age, DD was much much much later before she started speaking in sentences. She pointed/grunted and big brother/parents automatically gave her what she needed. It was quite a while before we copted on to this.
I know of several kids, from different generations, who were similar.

Smithagain · 12/07/2009 18:37

DD2 developed slower than DD1 in several ways. But it's definitely true that she's grown out of toys etc quicker than DD1 did, because all DD1's things are there to entice her.

TheProvincialLady · 12/07/2009 22:24

Cheers everyone for your replies. I do like it when everyone agrees with me

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Greensleeves · 12/07/2009 22:26

I think it depends on the children's personalities and the existing family dynamic.

My ds1 is a stressy perfectionist pedantic pernickety Aspie

so my ds2 has found his niche in the world by being a dishevelled little slacker with a filthy sense of humour

honestly the boy is so laid-back he's horizontal

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