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Potty training regression

6 replies

Libby65 · 06/05/2003 14:05

I know this subject has been visited a lot but I thought I'd ask a quick question rather than search through all the old threads.

Basically my ds is almost 3 and I started potty/toilet training him at 2 1/2. Things went really well very quickly, it didn't take long for him to be out of nappies and we only had a few accidents. Most of the time he was doing a wee in the toilet and a poo in the potty, although a few times he was even happy to sit on the toilet to do a poo. Every time he wanted to go, he would say "poo poo in the potty mummy", and he would go and get the potty himself and sit on it. Well I don't know what's happened, but the last few weeks he has just started pooing in his pants rather than doing it in the potty. If I consciously sit him on the potty and make him stay there, eventually he will do one, but if I don't put him on the potty he has recently just decided to do it in his pants instead. He did it again tonight, and the potty was only a couple of feet away from where he was sitting. I've tried praising him for doing it in the potty, and I've also tried being firm with him about doing it in his pants, because it's gotten to the point now where I've told him so many times that I'd like him to do it in the potty or the toilet (it's so frustrating...). It's just getting to me because he started out knowing exactly what to do, and now he's gone backwards.

Dh suggested rewarding him with something when he does a poo in the potty, but I'd really like to know why ds has regressed since doing so well in the beginning. No matter how much I talk to him about not doing it in his pants, he still persists even though he knows I'm not happy with it.

Does anyone know why this might be happening, or the best way to handle it? I don't know if he's just being lazy or if something has put him off using the potty. I don't want to make a 'thing' of it, but at the same time I don't want him to think it's ok to do it in his pants. Sorry this is long - appreciate your input with this.

OP posts:
Are your children’s vaccines up to date?
crystaltips · 06/05/2003 14:07

Is there anything happening at home / nursery that might have unsettled him. CHildren are very perceptive. Is there a change in routine perhaps that might have affected him ?

Libby65 · 06/05/2003 14:24

Nothing that I can think of crystaltips. His routine is pretty much the same so I can't think what would be causing it. He seems happy enough to sit on the potty when I MAKE him sit on it, but otherwise he chooses not to. I just don't know...

OP posts:
edgarcat · 06/05/2003 14:26

Message withdrawn

crystaltips · 06/05/2003 14:47

Sometimes they know exactly which buttons to press to get our attention don't they ?
Infuriating !
Hope you can persevere without turning it into a battle. ( DOn't take that as a slight ) I just remember that I got to the stage that I was so upset with the regression that I turned to shouting - I forgot who was the child and who was the adult

mammya · 06/05/2003 15:12

Can't really say anything about why he has regressed but I have a personal experience that might help: after my brother was born, I regressed too (I was 3 then) and my parents made me wash my "poo-ey" knickers. I don't know if the pooing in pants was an isolated incident or if my parents where just at the end of their tether, but I clearly remember washing the knickers (with the nailbrush...) and never did it again! Do you think you could try something like that?

aphra · 06/05/2003 15:19

Hi Libby65

We had a very similar problem, so I can really sympathise with you, it's infuriating. I posted about it a couple of months ago, when it was really getting to me badly. We'd been treating it as behavioural problem. But after posting about it here we talked to a toilet training expert and she said it's actually often a physical thing, brought on by constipation or diarroeah, they get retained stools (sorry, it's a bit graphic) and then lose control of their bowel movements. You can tell if it might be this if the poo is all runny. If it is you can treat with laxatives.

This worked for us, it was such a relief.
Maybe your ds is different from this, but it's worth just checking it's not a physical problem. I felt bad when we realised, 4 months after she'd regressed, that it wasn't my poor (and well behaved) dd's fault at all.

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