My 8 week old won't sleep during the day .. except when cuddled.

[ilovemyoboe]

Help! My 8 week old won't sleep during the day except when cuddled. He just doesn't stay down in his pram or cot. I pop him in fast asleep and he wakes within minutes. He sleeps very well at night - will sleep 11:30pm until 7am - but because he doesn't sleep during the day he gets VERY grouchy and irritable very quickly. He spends all afternoon and evening unsettled and upset because he is so overtired. I can't put him down for more than 5mins before he cries.

The only time he is happy is when he is breastfeeding. However because he is getting so tired, he keeps falling asleep when feeding. I'm not sure if he's getting enough food or not - the health visitor is coming to weigh him again today as he only put on 80g last week. He will fall asleep on the feeding cushion after most feeds (although not this morning) but usually wakes when I try to move him. This means the only way to get him to have some sleep is spend hours sitting in a chair with him .. which sounds nice, but is horrible in this heat, and means I can't even get a drink or go to the toilet, never mind attack the messy kitchen or sort the washing or the other 1001 things that need doing.

The latest advice from a La Lech League breast feeding counsellor via the health vis is that he is too young to sleep the night through and this is depriving him of a feed and affecting my milk production (as feeding in the night good as high hormone levels) so I should wake him at least once in the night for a feed. The last two nights, i've fed him at 10pm, got him in cot at 11:30pm, woke him at 3:30am for a feed, and then he's woken for day at 7am. So far the only difference I see is that he's now grouchy in the morning too as he has had even less sleep from being woken in the night. (He won't stay in the cot ever unless he's put in it asleep at the moment - settles himself back to sleep in the night, but not when first put down. Takes ages to feed and settle so the change-feed-settle in cot cycle takes 1.5-2hrs.)

Has anyone else had a baby of this age who won't sleep during the day? This started at around 6/6.5 weeks when he got more alert. My theory is that he is just too interested in what is going on around him to sleep as he's too busy looking around and doesn't want to shut his eyes. You can see him fighting sleep. He then gets so overtired that he doesn't know what to do with himself, and can't sleep unless I walk around rocking him .. and he often wakes if I sit down. Have tried a dimmed room to reduce stimulation, and it helps calm him, but he still doesn't stay in the cot. He's such a light sleeper a lot of the time, that unless he's in the cot he doesn't get a decent length sleep.

Having a miserable baby all day is really getting me down. We quite often spend the afternoon walking round the house with both of us crying! Any ideas or advice or similar stories much appreciated.

[TwentiethCenturyHeffa]

My DD was like this and it was a nightmare so you have my sympathies. She eventually settled herself into a nap routine though.

She slept in a sling and in her buggy if I walked far enough. I used to do laps of the local park to get her to sleep but once she was asleep I could normally stop walking, sit down and read a book.

I used to be really stressed about getting her to go for naps in her cot but if I could do it again I wouldn't bother because it was such a struggle and left me feeling so demoralised. I'd just go with the flow and let her sleep in the sling/buggy, which is what I eventually started doing and it left me much happier and more relaxed.

[ilovemyoboe]

Glad to hear we're not the only ones

Been trying out the Baby Whisperer four S method and that seems to work well at calming him and getting him to sleep. Sometimes stays in cot after one put down, usually after 2. Took 5 once yesterday. Am trying to get him sleeping in his cot using that method for 2-3 out of 5 naps a day. One is always on me and the other 1-2 probably in his front carrier.

Not tried one of the wrap type slings - are they all pretty much the same? The front carrier is good except his head moves around a bit as he's so tall that his head is higher than most of the support. Have to wedge him in with a cloth!

Have any of you found that letting baby sleep in the sling/buggy/after feeding has adversely affected putting them down in the cot at night or long term?

[Hazyb]

I have just felt such relief from reading your message, I felt like I was the only person with a baby that just refuses to sleep in the day!!!
Hes had me in tears most days, its so fustrating watching him yawning and rubbing his eyes but nothing I do will put him to sleep in the day, bar driving and considering the price of petrol at the moment I just cant afford it!
By the time it gets to bedtime, hes a wreck, we have bath, cuddles and real quiet time and then he just starts crying usually for about 2 hours, he wont take the breast and will only stop crying if myself or my partner stand up with him, god forbid we should sit in a chair for 5 minutes lol!!! Then all of a sudden after numerous attemps to feed him he will suddenly take it and drop off to sleep.
Im mentally exhausted in the day, unable to get anything done and just dread the end of the day, when hes so overtired it becomes a nightmare!
My babys 12 weeks old this week and although he seems to have always been quite a wakeful baby in the day, he seems to be getting worse.
So when your haviung a bad day remember your not alone!!! Hope things improve for you!
xxx

[likeanewmomagain]

It's comforting to know that there are others who are going through this 'my baby won't sleep' ordeal... I have an 11 week old baby boy and he won't nap during the day, wakes up 3-4 times during the night (early morning, that is). He will nap while I'm nursing him but the moment I get up, he wakes up too. I do watch out for his sleepy signs - but when I put him down, he can't get himself to sleep. Then he'll keep crying and get all upset - he is obviously soo sleepy but he just CAN'T and WON'T sleep!! It's really frustrating. He is swaddled at night - that kinda works for him. Tried that too during the day - works sometimes.

On a good day, my baby gets 4 hours total nap time - I think that's too little!! I'm worried it's gonna affect his growth.
This is my 3rd baby - but I never had this problem before. I don't remember crying in frustration with my first 2 kids...

I'm just hoping he'll get better in time - hopefully this doesn't become a bad habit that he'll carry 'til later in life.. We all need to sleep!!

[TurtleAnn]

Two quick checks to see if your DS is feeding enough are:

• express after a feed and see how much milk is left in your breast - if its loads and you fill a bottle, he hasn't had enough
• give him a top-up of formula and if he takes the whole bottle he was still hungry and hasn't had enough

[likeanewmomagain]

Sometimes I think there's something in my milk that keeps him awake - coz lately I'd give him a 3 oz bottle of formula at noon, and he'll be able to sleep. Hmm, is that actually possible?

[carrotsandpeasifyouplease]

another one the same here i'm afraid, wouldn't be put down and only slept when I walked him outside or in the car, needless to say we spent most of the time doing that. It was horrendous and completely surprising as newborns sleep all the time apparantly.

Its very tiring, and yes my baby slept at night too but not being able to do anything in the day is extremely exhausting, I freeze up when people say they were bored for the baby's first year of life - i wish i had had the time to be bored.

My ds wouldn't go in a sling either, he would be swaddled at about 3 months but i was still only getting 40 minutes at home. Once he dropepd his morning 40 minutes at about 1 year it was brilliant, he slept and still does (18 months) for anything up to 3 hours now after lunch. Nothing worked for me, but he did grow out of it - this too will pass!

[Paula1976]

Hi, My son is 8 weeks old and he too wont nap during the day unless he's in his car seat or in mine or my husbands arms, when we feel hes in a deep sleep we try and put him in his cot and he wakes within 10 minutes. He likes to be on your shoulders most of the time and mainly whilst you are standing, he hates you sitting down.

At night we are trying to get him into the bedtime routine, bath, massage, feed, and down for his sleep, and he is gradually getting the idea, we put him in his cot and he looks around and kicks about for a while and then he gradually sends himself to sleep.

He wakes for a feed in the night (2.30 -3am) and then its not too difficult to get him back to sleep, he generally falls asleep whilst feeding, but then he tends to wake up again between 5 -6am. I struggle to sleep sometimes as he is a very noisy sleeper which i believe is called REM (rapid eye movement) sleep, he grunts and kicks about. I find it difficult to sleep whilst he is doing this as we are in one bedroom flat.

We are investing in a blackout blind and a front carrier, because i dont get anything done in the day, as he likes to be upright and with me all the time.I am hoping the blackout blind will help him nap in the day and keep him asleep after 5am as the suns seems to come into our bedroom and make it very light.

I would welcome any ideas, and its nice to know I too am not the only out there with the same problems.

[fizzpops]

I remember having this and to be honest looking back I think it was because my DD had just got out of the very new baby thing of being oblivious to everything and was beginning to take notice so the world was becoming more interesting.

I was carrying her round in a sling as it was the only way she would sleep and my back was starting to feel it. My HV kindly told me that if she didn't learn to settle herself when she was little we would be facing the same battle but with a toddler shaking the bars of the cot. This scared me enough to leave her to cry for a little while, go back in and shush and put my hand on her chest then when she settled leave and start again until she was asleep.

She also went through a phase of only sleeping for 30 minutes no matter what I did but again this was only a phase.

[flamingtoaster]

My DS wouldn't let me put him down during the day until he was six weeks old. I cooked and ate one handed. If he fell asleep and I tried to put him down he woke up instantly. I still remember the first time I put him down to go to the loo and he didn't howl (even though he was in a bouncy chair on the landing so he could see me). Then one day it just suddenly stopped and he could be put down - I hadn't done anything different, he just felt OK about being put down and losing contact with me. I hope the phase your DS is going through will stop soon - to help him settle you could try rolling up a jumper (securely so he cannot get tangled in it) you have been wearing and putting it in the cot with him so he can still smell you and so not feel you are so far away. Didn't work for me - but you never know! Good luck.

[Halla17]

My Lil guy is 8wk and we have the same problem. We found out on our stay at the hospital that he loves the mamaroo device it mimics the car. He will sleep in that thing all day n night.

[Halla17]

www.babocush.com/ this device is also supposed to help with this, and price wise it's better than the mamaroo.

[Skippedthelightfandango]

This baby is at school now......

[Halla17]

I just saw the yr on here.

[rbmilliner]

Is something wrong?

My 7 week old has to been impossible to put down

Sh's not the best settler anyway and i have to nurse her to sleep (I know not good but that's for a different thread) but today she's been screaming whenever she's not feeding even when I'm holding her. She'll normally go down for 15 min stretches to sleep but not today. All she's done is scream when not feeding.
I'm finding out they are are not creatures of habit at this age but she seems particually upset today.

Is this normal? Could something be wrong?