ADHD A general moan about lack of support

[ACH]

Hi its me again. All was going not too bad then D goes back to school and within 3 days the SENCO is telling me that basically they are giving up on D they have tried all the suggestions but say they can no longer be positive and try and praise him and its looking more and more likely he is going to be excluded from school. The child and family therapist came round to visit and she was very understanding but still came up with the usual comments that you have to be positive and make sure you give praise for the smallest good thing. easier said than done especially when it comes to school. I'm now seriously considering taking D to London to see Dr Mark Atkinson who the SENCO recommended it is just the cost putting me off £120 for the first hour, £25 ongoing support per month and £70 for half an hour every 2 and 6 months. Has anybody got any other suggestions? I've tried star charts, bribary, praise and keeping positive to boost his self esteem. He is also on a wheat and dairy free diet because of his excema and psoriasis. Dont know what to try next. Feeling very fed up about the whole thing at the moment.

Oh for goodness sake! Why are school's so totally unable to cope with ADHD.

I have met a few people with children with ADHD through autism groups. Some of them have ended up home educating and found a lot of the problems disappeared, once the restrainsts of school were removed. Absolutely no idea whether that is possible for you/. If you want to know more I'll dig out the address of the SEN HE webiste- they run a useful email group.

Does D have a statement? Would it be worth applying for one. You can request an assessment yourself. For more info have a look on the IPSEA website- again I don't have the address but a google search will get you there.

Have you tried fish oils? Apparently they can be as effective a ritalin. Efalex is a good brand.

And as for the cost- ridiculous isn't it. Have a look into it- if you think it would be really worthwhile it might be worth spending the cash- if you think it would make a big difference.

Not much advice- but know how you feel (ds1 has autism- we're off to BIBIC in June- at ridiculous personal expense). Do you think other member of your family would help with the cost? Some of ours offered out of the blue when they'd heard we'd booked a visit ot BIBC. It will help us considerably.

Hi Jimjams yes my mum has said she will help out because if it will help it will be worth it and at the moment the situation seems to be spiralling out of control with all the school problems. I have heard of efalex now I've seen it written down again somebody told me about it a long time ago before D was diagnosed and I couldn't remember what it was. I'll give that a go. You get to the stage when you're willing to try almost anything. We have got another school down the road which is very supportive to children with special needs I know at the moment they have got several children with ADHD and Autism. I'm going to find out about statementing again and see what I can get done as its another thing that the school seem unwilling to do. you would think that ADHD, ADD, Autism etc were unknown illness's that were very rare a lot of parents obviously know differently. I'm also going to approach the governors in the school especially after a letter was sent out from the governor of the infant school saying that the headteacher is being seconded for a year to do a course with the LEA on behaviour and emotional problems in children. I feel all teachers should have the opportunity to do this or a least courses provided to outline the problems they should expect and be able to deal with with children with ADHD etc. It should also be something they are made to do as part of thier training as it is not uncommon. I'm still moaning I know but its just so frustrating and its good to get it out of my system. Thank you for replying.

Very frustrating! I think some schools you just have to give up on. Otherwise you just end up banging your head against a brick wall. Any chance of him transferring to the other school? An understanding school can make such a difference.

I've used Efalex for ds1's dyspraxia- I saw results within a couple of months- which is kind of the time frame you need to allow. It is very fishy! I use the oil as ds1 can't have capsules, but the capsules are definitely easier to take.

good luck- and feel free to moan- I spend all my time moaning about the appalling lack of provision for SEN!

ACH where in the country are you? I'm in Hampshire and find that the support for children with ADHD is usually very positive in schools here. Is there another school near you that would be more sympathetic?

Lara2, Hi I live in Berkshire. I have heard positive things about other schools in the area but also negative. I heard today from the educational psychologist who said he has been accepted to get a place in the PRU for half a day 4 times a week and spend the rest of the time in his usual school. I should hopefully get a letter of confirmation tomorrow. His disruptive behaviour at the moment is affecting everything school, cubs and his swimming lessons. He now isnt allowed to go on the cub camp at the end of May which is a real shame but I can see why. It always seems a case of one step forward and two back. What sort of support do the schools in your area supply?

Sorry ACH, been up to my eyeballs and nowhere near a computer for ages! Our schools give good basic training to class teachers - good support from the authority through organisations like BIS - Behavioural Intervention Service - and close contact with the behaviour clinic etc. All diagnosed children have an IEP ( and usually those that are waiting for diagnosis!)on the grounds of behaviour and these are up-dated every half term. They have small realistic targets on them. I find that there is sympathy and understanding generally when talking to oher teachers on courses. I'm primary, so have no idea if it is so sympathetic in secondary around here.
I find it so sad that the SENCO at the school says they can no longer be positive towards your son - has he really been so bad that they are ready and willing to give up on him?

Hi Lara 2, The behaviour support worker has had her last visit to the school we told her what the senco had said before she went in and since then the senco seems to be being more positive again and is working very hard to help D out. he is met each morning from the school office by his teaching assistant that the school has arranged that at the moment he has a T/A available all of the time during class to work with him out of the class. He has been excluded again at lunchtimes since last wednesday until after halfterm which is a big inconvinience for me to work round and not a problem to D as he really enjoys being with me at dinnertime. A lot of the problems come down to the headteacher, classteacher and dinnerladies lacking understanding of ADHD. there was a good article in a local newspaper the Staines Informer saying about the ignorance and prejudice facing children with ADHD and thier parents because people just see the child as a naughty child and not one with a medical problem that they cant help. bit of a long one this time but its good to get it out of my system now and then. hopefully this week something good will come out of the child therapist visit and our visit to the PRU. Fingers crossed!