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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

No word's, no pointing and no walking either.

74 replies

MUSA · 09/05/2005 17:40

I do this topic has being mentioned so many time's, i feel so depressed everyone in my family is getting to me and i don't no what i should do.

My ds is 20 month's, he has no words, does'nt point and can't walk either.

I feel like im letting my son down, he babble's on all the time, in his own word's can't even say mummy or daddy.

Any suggestion's on what i should do, he is my only child.

OP posts:

hermykne · 09/05/2005 17:41

musa
have u consulted with your hv / doc or anybody in a priof capacity if u are worried?

Original poster

MUSA · 09/05/2005 17:51

Hermykne, i can't bring myself to taking him, in case they tell me there is something wrong with him.

I goona wait until he is 2, and if still no words than i will take him, is that to late.?

OP posts:

WigWamBam · 09/05/2005 18:01

If there is a problem, then I would think that the earlier you can get it flagged up, the better.

hermykne · 09/05/2005 18:02

oh musa you not helping him by delaying it if there is a problem. if he needs a little help wouldnt you feel so much better knowing he was progressing. and if there isnt then wont u feel comforted.

Blossomhill · 09/05/2005 18:03

I really think you should take him now as to not be walking at 20 months would be a concern. The pointing would worry me to.
Sorry as I know how worried you must be but believe me the earlier you get help the better it will be.

Fio2 · 09/05/2005 18:03

MUSA you sons development is delayed. You need to go to your GP or HV and get a referal to a development paedatrician NOW. Please do this. i know it is so hard but he needs to be seen by someone and get refered for physio and speech therapy. DO IT NOW, you will never forgive yourself if it turns out he has a problem and you didnt get help sooner

Fio2 · 09/05/2005 18:04

crikey blossomhil, x posts

Blossomhill · 09/05/2005 18:06

Fio - Great minds think alike . Although we both know how important early intervention is as we have experience!

Original poster

MUSA · 09/05/2005 18:15

ok guy's im gonna take him this week, thank you very much for the advice, i know you are all right.

OP posts:

Fio2 · 09/05/2005 18:16

Good for you MUSA I know its hard, I felt like my insides had been taken out screwed up and shoved back in my body. i felt sick, i couldnt concentrate. It is an awful awful feeling

I hope it all goes well and keep us informed

GRMUM · 09/05/2005 18:20

Not walking at 20 months is late but i wouldn't say it is delayed yet. what can he do ? Sit independantly and play with toys? Crawl? Cruise round the furniture? You should see your GP or HV though,sooner is better so that if he does need help it starts as early as possible.You aren't letting him down, you're just scared and I can fully understand that.

Davros · 09/05/2005 18:28

You are doing the right thing MUSA, its hard though MY DD didn't walk until 19 months and I was on the verge of freaking! She did get around though but, as her brother has autism and didn't walk until 16 months, I thought and hoped she would do everything quicker than him. She didn't really have any words at 20 mos but lots of communication and was pointing but seemed SOOO babyish compared to the other children we mix with, she still does actually. Her language is slow but she has had glue ear (which I'm sceptical about as I think it delays parents getting help on communication but that just shows me!). But I think she's fine now, she's 26 months.
You are doing the right thing and remember, lots of us know how it feels so do let us all know what happens and say so if you feel shit!

Newbarnsleygirl · 09/05/2005 18:28

Just wanted to share my recent experience of this with you.
My dd 19 months is not talking at all. I spoke to my HV who sent someone she called a Nursey nurse to see dd and see how she behaved, played etc.

After her visit she said there was no need for concern just yet as she was babbling but if she is still not talking by the time she has her 2 year check up then they will refer her to a speech therapist.

My mums friend has a ds who is 20 months and isn't walking. She took him for a check up and he was fine, just lazy
However if it was me I would get him checked up even if there is nothing wrong, for your peace of mind as you seem quite understandably anxious about it.

Hope everything goes well.

Original poster

MUSA · 09/05/2005 18:42

My ds is a bum shuffler, he is really fast maybe that's why he does'nt walk, his motor skill's are fine to he play's with other kid's to. He does nod his head for no.

He hold's on to the furniture and walk's up and down.

OP posts:

Chandra · 09/05/2005 18:52

I think that GPs consider the possibility of a delay if a child doesn't walk by 18m. The worrying issue here is pointing. LEt us know how it goes. I would skip the HV, unless she is a very experienced sensible one as this is something that falls out of their expertise.

Original poster

MUSA · 09/05/2005 19:01

I sometime's wonder if he has autism, is would i said some of the sign's, or is he too young still to know?

OP posts:

Chandra · 09/05/2005 19:06

Don't worry for that, but have him checked, whatever the reason of that delay, the sooner that it is identified the better, and then you can take steps to help him

RnB · 09/05/2005 19:11

Message withdrawn

Socci · 09/05/2005 19:45

Message withdrawn

GRMUM · 09/05/2005 19:49

Musa bum shuffling, cruising and fine motor skills sound good, but I would take him to the GP if only to put your mind at rest.x

milge · 09/05/2005 19:50

Musa, as your ds is weight bearing, and cruising, he will eventually walk. I would reiterate what others have said and ask for a referral to your developmental paeds consultant - lack of pointing is one of the flags for autistic disorders, and it is better to be safe than leave it and hope it will go away. It is so difficult to admit to someone else that you think your child is developmentally different, after all, we each think of our child as perfect, but he will thank you later for being such a brave mum. I would bypass your HV and go straight to your GP.

kid · 09/05/2005 19:51

Bum shuffling can make a child walk late, my DD did this and she took her first steps at 21 months. Can your DS stand or walk around the furniture? My DD couldn't weight bear until she was 18 months old.

The speech may come later but you need to have the not walking checked out. If your DS does need speech therapy then its best to be referred now as the waiting list can be long.
I have no idea about the pointing but hopefully a Dr can help you.

morningpaper · 09/05/2005 19:52

Has he had a hearing test btw?

baka · 09/05/2005 20:44

You need a referral- rather than go the slooooow SALT route ask if you can be referred to see a developmental paed- the not pointing in combination with not walking should get you there (too early to worry about not talking- so don't mention that- you will be fobbed off- stress not pointing). Does he share your attention (try to direct you in some way to things that interest him- rather than things he wants iyswim)?

Much sympathy- been there done that got the t-shirt. however horrible "knowing" something is it's much better than the horrible gnawing doubt that comes before- honestly.

Original poster

MUSA · 09/05/2005 22:12

Thank you soooooooooo much guy's, for all your advice i feel so much better, and thinking positive.

Don't know what i would do without mumsnet.

xxxxx.

OP posts:

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