14 mth old screamer, how can I make her stop?

[Dragonfly74]

DD has always been a clingy baby and is always at her happiest when being played with or cuddled, This is obviously lovely but if I have to put her in her playpen while cooking dinner or doing some other housework she screams so loud that I feel like my ears will explode.

She actually screams until she turns red and shakes with rage, I know that she is only doing this for attention and she is frustrated because she can't have what she wants. I have tried to ignore this because if I tell her to stop she screams more, This has been going on for 3-4 months now and i'm reaching the end of my tether.

Does anyone else have a LO who does this and if so how are you coping with it??

TIA

she does it because she wants to be with you and not shut in a playpen.
I would deal with it by not putting her in the playpen!
she's only a baby, she isn't doing it for attention, she's trying to tell you that she is unhappy

I also love being with her thisisyesterday she isn't shut in the playpen for long periods of time it is only while I have to be out of the room. I don't want to leave her to hurt herself.

but you could take her with you surely?

Some kids are just like this, my DS was a fairly smiley baby and toddler. DD is a screamer - I think they will eventually use their words and become more physically and verbally independent.

Dragonfly - yes, my LO does do this and in answer to how am I coping with it I'd say I'm not! DD2 has been a screamer for as long as I can remember and is now 15 months. Your description of your DD turning red and shaking with rage sounds exactly like her. She does it mostly when she is strapped into her pushchair or highchair (not always) but more generally when she doesn't get her own way! Of course the fact that she is a twin complicates things further as she rarely gets my undivided attention which possibly makes it worse. Once she gets herself into a rage there is little I can do to calm her down and she flings herself around and howls. I've found she's worse when hungry or tired. I can't offer you much advice I'm afraid but can sympathise esp with the fact that there are times when you do have to leave the room!!! One thing I did try the other day was to put cushions down on the floor all around and her and left her to it (whilst still in the room, playing with her twin). She did calm down eventually. It's very hard, isn't it. Am hoping it's just the terrible twos very early and she will grow out of it (hopeful emoticon).

Thankyou Twinmam yes it is hard and like you say if your attention has to be elsewhere it just makes matters worse, I have a 3.3yr old ds and he obviously needs me to, if she see's me giving him a hug she screams.

I try to sit with them both and read a book with them but DD screams because she doesn't want DS to be there she has even on occassion hit him. I feel quite stressed by it at the minute like there not enough of me to go around.

Def recognise that feeling Dragonfly. I'd say just try not to be too hard on yourself and on her (I mean in terms of that feeling really frustrated and thinking 'why are you being like this' which I have found myself doing). There probably isn't enough of you to go around but that's OK - both your DCs will learn from this. I guess just persist in calm distraction/ removal if she's hitting your DS and keep on doing things with them together. I'm sure she'll get used to it. Maybe hug him then hug her and encourage them to hug one another too? My DTs are forever shoving/ biting/ hitting but will also now kiss and hug each other which is really quite adorable I do wonder if/ hope that when my DD is old enough to talk and communicate more easily she will get less frustrated plus I will be able to explain things to her. I do that anyway, ie 'Right, let's get you in your pushchair and then we can go out for a lovely walk' - I read somewhere on MN that explaining what you're doing all the time helps toddlers get used to things. I also try not to give in to the tantrums although we've had to come back from walks because I've been worried she'll have convulsions!