What will I do with 1.5 year DS who has started wailing when put to bed now?!

[ilikeyoursleeves]

He was so good before, he would go in his cot and chat to his toys and drift off to sleep on his own with his lullaby music, no problems! Then in the past week he has started WAILING when I put him in his cot for bed. He still enjoys the routine before bed and tonight when I asked him if he wanted to go to bed he took himself up to his room and pulled his grobag out etc. But he has now been wailing for almost an hour! I've gone up intermittently to reassure him but it seems to make him worse.

We have brought him back downstairs for a bit the past few nights to calm him down and he then goes to sleep no probs but I don't want him to associate wailing with getting his own way and coming back down to watch a bit of TV with mummy and daddy either. Help?!

I am having exactly the same problem with my 18 month old dd. She used to take herself u to bed but the past week or so she has started crying for no reason.

No advice but lurking with intrest

Not actually go to bed byherself, but if we said to her 'do you want to go to bed' at about 7.30ish she would walk towards the stairs and one of us would take her up

DD did exactly this at 18 months. We did a gradual withdrawal thing with her - sitting by bed first couple of nights, then further away, etc etc then outside door. Took maybe 10 days/2 weeks in all (we just read or listened to radio on earphones) and worked brilliantly, with no stress for any of us. I think it's quiet common at this age - they seem to suddenly get a bit anxious and need extra reassurance.

Worth a go, anyway - get a booklight and earphones!

oooh we've got the same with 20month old dd. i think they start to realise that we're not going to bed/there are more interesting things going on downstairs at this age.

We just sit with dd in the dark cuddling her irate screaming figure and saying shhh bedtime. Then she will ask for bed, so we put her i bed. then she will scream to come out so we get her out and hold her writhing figure whispering shhhh bed time...you get the idea

It probably doesn't work any better than anyone elses, but the screaming goes straight through me and sets my teeth on edge if i try to ignore her, so at least this way i feel like i am doing something IYSWIM

Eventually she gets tired and doesnt bother to cry any more as it doesnt get her her own way, sadly this has meant she hasn't gone to bed til after 8 for the past few nights, a good hour later than usual hopefully it's just a phase

Our 18 month old dd is doing exactly the same.

I come home from work at 7.30ish, so I have dinner when she'd in bed. The first few nights she screamed when we put her down, I thought she might be unwell so brought her downstairs so she saw me having dinner .. big mistake as she wants to come down every night.

Like beesonmummyshead said, they realise there is something more intresting happening downstairs.

DH used to get her ready for bed whilst I was at work and most of the time she'd be in bed by the time I came home.

I have now introduced a new rountine. DD has a cup of warm milk downstairs that I get for her at 7.45 and then upstairs straight away for teeth, change and then in bed for 8pm. We've been doing this for a week and tonight was the first night we've been able to leave her upstairs byself with no screaming/crying - fingers crossed.

Excuse typos - very tired!

My 14 mth started doing the say thing, as did everyother 1 year I know and all at about the same time!!!!!

I have now removed her afternoon nap, or if she didn't sleep in the morning she can have a short one not past 3pm and now we have no problem at all. Yesterday as we had been out in the morning and she didn't sleep in her pushchair i let her go to sleep when we got home and against better judgement let her sleep till 3:35 and she started crying when I pout her down last night doh!

20 month DS has started this game this week - gets ready for bed quite happily but refuses to climb in and lie down which he used to do quite happily.

The last few nights we've had to bring him back downstairs for 15 minutes while we ate our dinner (no toys allowed though!), then he goes to bed without too much trouble after that (but only for me, not DH).

Might try delaying bedtime which starts at 7.30, although I think he'll still want to come back downstairs!

Hi there, my DS did this around the same age. Tunred out he had suddenly decided he did not like the cot anymore. We had tried everything like you have, staggered bedtimes, etc.....then as a last resort we turned his bed into a bed rather than the cot and he LOVED it. Got in himself never looked back. Was a sad time for me when my baby was ot in his cot anymore but he seemed to need the independance. He did get out for 30 mins to play(I watched on the camera from downstairs) then tootled to bed when he wanted to sleep. Just a suggestion as it worked for megoodluck

I strongly recommend that you don't get them up and out of bed once you've got them in - recipe for disaster!

If this help, at that age what worked was one day time nap waking up no later than 3.15pm and then going to bed and me walking out of her room at 7pm at the latest.

It is non negogiable in our house and after the occasional 2-3 night 'messing about', she would accept it and it all worked out fine. It's very hard though!!

Thanks for all the tips! Well after the night of the >1 hour of wailing, DS only cried for about 5-10 minutes the next few nights so I think he must have got the message that he has to stay in his bed now! Weirdly he had his nap from 3-5pm today then went to bed at 730pm with no problems, hardly a peep from him but then he's just developed a cold so I think he must be feeling zonked with it.

We are off on hols next week so hopefully he won't regress again!