Settling a week old baby in his cot

[ilovemyoboe]

My baby boy is one week old and we're having great trouble settling him in his cot. For the first couple of days after birth he was fine, but when my milk came in he started screaming every time he was laid flat. The only way to get him to sleep was to have him in a semi-upright position on his tummy on one of us. We ended up doing shift patterns through the night so at least one of us could get some sleep.

We've discovered the not wanting to lie flat was due to reflux, and have been giving him infant gaviscon after each feed since yesterday lunchtime. The problem is now getting him to settle in his cot for any period of time. He has managed 2 hours once, but usually it's not much more than half an hour which isn't much use for us at nighttime .. so we're still doing shifts with one person downstairs with him trying to settle him. We've been trying to do 'cot training' during the day too to get him used to it. Any suggestions? Can such a young baby have already got used to sleeping on one of us and have to be weaned off this, or is it more likely newborn insecurity at being in the outside world?

Would welcome any advice or suggestions as getting a bit desperate for some sleep.

He quite often wakes up with hiccups which is really annoying and takes ages to get rid of them.

can you put the cot with one side off next to your bed, or have him in a moses basket on the bed with you? He'll want to know you're close by. Lots of skin to skin contact, lots of holding. I KNOW it seems like forever, but don't worry about setting up bad habits, babies are really adaptable and their needs do change and shift as they grow, regardless of what you do, almost. Someone told me to put a t-shirt with the baby that I had worn a lot to settle them in the cot. Don't think it worked for me, but maybe...Feed as often as he wants/you can manage. It's really hard, but it is everything he needs - food, drink, comfort, security, and it is the only thing that matters to him right now. Don't know about reflux etc. Congratulations and just enjoy as much as you can, take to your bed with him and have everyone wait on you if that's what it takes x

we had this with dd1. the whole shift pattern thing lasted 6-8 weeks then she was (is) the best sleeper ever. just feed to sleep/ rock to sleep/ sleep on you. it is SUCH early days that i really wouldnt worry about setting patterns quite yet. just do whatever it takes to get some sleep and i promise it will improve with time. i do understand that desperation for sleep. it will get better i promise..... congratulations on your beautiful baby.

My 10 day old is exactly the same! He is fine in the carry cot during the day but won't settle in it at night. I am co-sleeping with him in a king-size bed with a very firm mattress. I am breastfeeding him and it makes life a lot easier than it was with DS1, who I really struggled with. We did with DS1 what you are doing now.

DS2 is fine lying next to me but completely unsettled in his crib. Odd, isn't it?

Babies like to be held a lot. You aren't making a rod for your own back or anything like that. Enjoy this cuddly stage, it doesn't last long.

Oh, and definitely sleep as much as you can during the day. I didn't really do that with DS1 and regret it now.

with ds we had to raise head of cot slightly and had him in moses basket in side the cot early days he needed lots of skin to skin contact but began settling better the older he got by 6 mths he was in his own room in cot sleeping from 5-6 with dream feed at 12

Do you swaddle your ds? Have 3 kids (latest 3 weeks) and it's really worked with all of them.
Otherwise I take them up to their room (or wherever they're sleeping) and give them a cuddle until they're drowsy (already swaddled at this point), put them in their crib/cot, tuck them in tight, potter around quietly for a couple of minutes (putting clean clothes away/tidying, then kiss them, put some music on (lullaby pull-thing) and am out. Then shush-pat as required and if that's not working repeat the process from scratch again.
I think with littlies you just have to be consistent. It's too early to beat yourself up if something isn't working, just keep working at it and they'll learn the cues before too long.
Also I'd put something under the head end of the crib/cot to tilt it and make your ds's sleep more comfortable if he's suffering with reflux (bricks/books/whatever.)

Try raising the head of his basket/cot, the reflux will be making him uncomfortable lying completely flat, although at a week old it is normal for him to want to be held most of the time even without reflux. Although ican understand that it's hard work not being able to put him down at all. You can buy wedges for cots so that the baby sleeps on an incline, which is good for babies with reflux. i think i saw one on the verbaudet website for about £20.

Hello all,
Thank you for your replies. We've tried raising the head of the cot a little but doesn't seem to help. He'll sleep in his bouncer or the car seat, although it sometimes takes a bit of persuasion. Seems to like some noise too - can understand that he wouldn't like silence as being in the womb isn't particularly quiet!

The gaviscon has made a huge difference to the reflux problem and he doesn't scream through every change now, only some of them and doesn't appear in pain which is good. He's still not that happy on his back. That might be down to wind though. We'll keep persevering.

We were swaddling him but he doesn't seem to like being restricted. Will try every few days just to see how he takes to it but he's not been happy swaddled since about day 3 so far.

Think we'll try and crack the lying on his back issue first as it may be that that is the real problem and not the cot at all.