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Behaviour/development

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am i dealing with this right? dd (2.6yr) has started noticing some people have "brown faces"...

8 replies

yousaidit · 06/05/2009 22:18

... we live in a cross racial area, eg muslim, pakistani, asian etc (sorry if i've not got any of those cultures correct) cultures, we've gt lovely asian neighbours who we get on really well with. dd, being a chatty, inquisitive soul, told me when we were getting in the car that our neighbours son 'has a brown face' and also points this out if she sees people when we're out shopping or in the park. now, obviously, dd is just poinying out something new that she's noticed, there;'s nothing wrong with that, so i've just started replying by saying, 'yes, thats right, that lady / man has got a brown face, and you've got a pink face, there are lots peolple with different coloured faces, aren't there?'

so, not making a big deal, but not getting into too big a conversation.
am i answering er best, does that sound ok,?

would anyone think if they overheard us talking that they would find it nice or insulting? any suggestions or feedback so i know i'm answering her ok would be nice, thanks!

OP posts:
TamaraKing · 06/05/2009 22:46

Why not try and read some books about everyone being different but all the same, ie - two ears, eyes etc.

Allyinoz · 07/05/2009 08:57

Mem Fox writes a book: We are all different, we are all the same, which includes different cultures in it, it is suitable for little ones.

Allyinoz · 07/05/2009 08:58

Sorry, it's called Whoever You Are. Long day!

MrsMattie · 07/05/2009 09:04

My 4 yr old son is mixed race and will often comment on whether someone was 'brown like me' or 'peachy like you, mummy'. I think it's perfectly natural for children of all races to start noticing those basic differences in human beings and to comment on them.

The way you are dealing with it sounds fine.

I would also recommend getting a couple of nice stories that rase this issue gently.

We've got a book called 'We're Different, We're the Same' - featuring all the Sesame Street characters, and another called 'The Skin I'm In' - better for older children, perhaps.

yousaidit · 05/06/2009 23:46

thanks for all your posts! i couldn't find it in threads i'm on for some reason and had to search for it hence delayed response! will try out the book recommended. dd has now sarted pointing out pink faces now!! but the best one had to be daddys red face!!

OP posts:
LadyG · 06/06/2009 01:24

Ten little fingers and ten little toes by Mem Fox is also very sweet-lots of cute babies of different skin colour with the refrain ...and each of these babies as everyone knows, had ten little fingers and ten little toes.

Acinonyx · 06/06/2009 10:47

My nearly 4 yr-old is mixed race but looks very white. She frequently talks about how she and daddy have pinky skin and need lots of suncream but mummy's skin is browner and she doesn't need cream (not in this saddo UK climate anyway).

I'm more concerned that we have moved to a totally white enclave - when I see a tinted person in these parts I feel like running up and hugging them and begging them to befriend me!

MrsMattie · 06/06/2009 10:50

LOL!@Acinonyx

My best friend told me recently that when she lived in Barcelona, she used to chase other black women down the street and try to befriend them just so she could ask them where the got their hair done, as there were no afro hairdressers anywhere. lol

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