advice needed on how to cope with bedwetting

[jupp]

Hi, I would really appreciate some advice on how to cope with bedwedding. My daughter (5 years 5 months) still wets the bed every night. We kept her in pullups but she was beginning to wonder why her friends did not need them when she did. She also had lots of infections from being in wet nappies.

A couple of months ago we were referred to a Renal Clinic, where we were advised to get rid of pullups and wake her in the night once or twice depending on what she needs. Two months later we are all exhausted and have gone from waking twice a night to once a night and now back to twice as getting worse again.

I am tempted to get her back into nappies but wonder what it will do to her self esteem. I am sure the clinic will recommend an alarm, but really hate the idea of that. We need to go to the clinic tomorrow and I am really uncertain whether there is any point in even going! Does anyone have any advice?

If a 5-year isn't dry at night that is considered normal. So the clinic seems to be fighting nature a bit.....

My son has phases of bedwetting at 6.5. It's no big deal.

I realize it's (too?) early but I feel the clinic has pressured us into something we don't necessarily want. And I don't want to upset my daughter by going back to nappies... I wish we'd never gone to the clinic

Agree that 5 is still too young for it to be an "issue" - but my 5yr old ds is very self-conscious about wearing pull-ups now - claims that no-one else in his class does . I put pull-ups on him after he has gone to sleep as I cannot face being woken up in the night & all the extra laundry (we do try without them from time to time though)

I am a bit surprised that they have suggested waking her during the night - thought this wasn't viewed as a "good thing"? Tbh whenever I tried to wake mine before I went to bed I couldn't get them to wake up sufficiently to do anything!

Personally i would try lots of drinks during the day (to help increase bladder capacity) and then restrict drinks after, say 6pm. Some children also tend to wet more if they have certain drinks - like blackcurrant.

"I wish we'd never gone to the clinic"
I bet you do. sounds like you've accidentally got into a "system".

Is there any other downside to pullups other than the self-esteem issue? Assuming no, you can buy "pyjama pants" that are marketed at older age-groups.

My son puts his own bedlinen in the washing machine and turns it on if he wets - this reduces stress and helps him feel grownup.....he also knows where the sleeping bag is so he can climb into it if he wets without disturbing us.

When DD3 attended the Enrusis clinic we were told not to wake her at night because unless she was really fullly awake it would just encourage her to wet in her sleep.

thanks for the feedback! I guess I just have to go to the clinic full of confidence and tell them that the waking is not working and that we want to go back to nappies for a while. Need to prepare my daughter for that tonight so she is not surprised tomorrow. Or I may just cancel the appointment and do what I think is right.

I did see on the ERIC website that waking was not recommended -- funny as the clinic pointed me to that website. But we had already started when I saw that, so I thought I'd give it a shot.

Regarding the drinks, I have noticed that certain juices (cranberry for example) seem to really make it worse. I try tio make her drink a lot during the day but not after 5 pm, but it's difficult as she forgets to drink at school and is then really thirsty late in the afternoon.

will try to get pyjama pants -- what are they?

they are made by huggies and sold along with the other nappies in the supermarket. huggies drynites

Excellent, thanks so much! Now all that remains is to convince my husband, the clinic and my daughter that this is the best way to go.

Normally, I would agree it's silly to keep a 5 year old out of nappies if they wet every single night without fail. Eneuresis clinics don't normally help children with bedwetting problems until they are at least 7, as the problem is considered pretty common (ie normal) in children younger than this and therefore not something that needs treatment. HOWEVER, if the clinic advised you not to put your daughter in nappies because they genuinely believe these are helping to provoke her bladder infections, then I would be careful about putting her back into them without speaking to the clinic first. After all, bladder infections can ultimately lead to serious kidney damage if inadequately treated, and even if they don't, you don't want her constantly on antibiotics (unless the clinic have prescribed a permanent low dose of them for her to help ward serious infections off). Have they found any structural reasons for her repeated bladder infections??? Have they given other advice or treatment??? I must admit, if leaving her out of nappies at night and waking her to go to the toilet twice a night is the only help you've been given, then it's not much help and is not going to lead to her growing out of the problem that quickly by herself!!!!

ps don't worry about self esteem issues, just reassure your daughter that lots of children her age wet the bed at night and that she will grow out of it all by herself.

thanks for the thoughtful posting. Sorry, I did not make it clear that she had lots of skin infections, not bladder infections. So it was more to do with antibiotic creams or steroid creams than with actual courses of antibiotics. I must say that this has been a lot better since we dropped the nappies, so some good has come of that. This may indeed be a good reason not to go back to nappies.

I have decided to go to the clinic without my daughter tomorrow, so that I can have a much more frank discussion with the doctor. The really have not given me much help, but perhaps they will tomorrow.