4.5 DD with OCD?

[Vicx]

Please help! my 4.5 year old DD has been displaying some strange behaviour for the last few months.

She's the eldest of 3 and she's always been very bright but cautious - the kind of kid that won't step past the threshold of the door without her shoes on. I first noticed it before xmas when we started teaching her how to wipe her own bum. She kept washing her hands over and over because she was convinced that her hands were dirty or there was still soap on them.

If she touches her eyes, nose, ears, mouth, hair or even fingers(!) afterwards she thinks she has infected them with soap and starts an unbearable tantrum and even screaming that her eyes are burning!!

Nursery teach them to wash their hands before and after she eats and it's like a life rule for her that can't be broken. If their are dishes in the sink and i say not to bother she'll just start whimpering and then touch everything on her plate with her hands and then refuse to eat because it's contaminated.

We told her that if she washes her hands too much they will get very dry, now she gets upset that she's touched her ear and then refuses to wash her hands as she thinks they will flake off!!!!!

She's regressed in all areas since the symptoms appeared for example she's wetting occasionally and she takes ages to dress herself in the morning and often needs help. She wakes up repeatedly in the night to tell me that her feet touched the floor, she touched her fingers or that she THINKS she may have touched her bum!

We took her to the doctor in the hope of nipping it in the bud and they have referred us to the peadtrician. But the appointment isn't or six weeks and i'm going out of my mind!!!!!

Is it OCD or is she too young for something like that? Does anyone have something like this going on in their home? Or experience or advice with dealing with this?

V grateful for all replies. x

I would say shes showing signs of OCD. My friends sister has this and has for life. She has been to congnitive therapy, councelling and it helped a little but shes never been cured.

Maybe instead of telling her 'her hands will get dry'. Everytime she wants to wash her hands let her. Dont make a fuss and ignore it. Get her some soap that wont affect her eyes and can be moisturising. Aveeno for example.

If you tell someone with OCD not to do something, they tend to do it more.

Makwee sure there is no bleach around the house that she can reach as sometimes a person with cleaning OCD will want to use the bleach to kill off the germs.

Where has she learnt the word 'contaminated'?

Why dont you try giving her the alcohol rub, the small ones in bottles to carry around with her. Tell her its an antibacterial and will kill ALL germs with a tiny bit.

Hi Vicx

Its the first time if posted on Mumsnet but just happened to be scanning the talk board and saw your message. I'm a newish mum, DS is 9mths old. I'm an OCD suffer myself and from what I know about the research I have done it typically doesn't develop until early 20's, however children/ teenagers do sometimes develop it. I agree with what Chellesgirl says about if you tell someone with OCD not to do something they tend to do it more. I find that if someone makes a big deal of it it makes me worse and I tend to get stressed and then do the compulsive behaviour even more. My advice would be to be calm and relaxed around her and try almost to not pay any attention to it. I find this helps with myself. There is a website called OCDAction - should come up on a search engine that offers advice and support. Sorry I may not have been much help but it may help you to know that people are out there that cope with OCD and continue to get on with life.

Vicx - we had a similar problem with DS2 (5). Afer an informal chat with the educational psychologist at school it was sorted out. It may be an indication that your DS is insecure about something completely unrelated. For us ,lots of cuddles and stories about when he was a tiny baby over a period of a few weeks sorted out the insecurity. Sorting out the 'OCDish' behaviour was quite straight forward - you need to replace the 'negative' act with a positive one. You may need to back track a little. I think I overdid the 'bacteria' thing so I ended up saying 'it's only poo darling - you do know that flies eat it' (Washing hands before and after eating is however a good idea IMO). When she touches her face and thinks she might have infected it, can you encourage her to say something like 'I think I might have put fairy dust on my ear/eye/lips'. You could explain it to her as a way to help get the wrong idea out of her head. Afterall, she can't possibly comprehend the whole bacteria/infection thing.

I'm not sure I've explained this well but it did work for us and it just might for you too. BTW My DH was'horrified' by DS2's behaviour but I was overcome with an eerie calm as I often am when I think situations are beyond my control. Try to keep positive - good luck.

Sorry meant DD .