How do you respond when your DC makes an embarrassing comment?

[kidcreoleandthecoconuts]

My DS is 3.5 and has just got to that age where he's started to notice different things about people and has started to comment on them.....sometimes very loudly! For example my landlady is lovely but does have a 'facial hair problem'.....the other day out of the blue my DS said, 'Mrs x has a moustache doesnt she mummy?'. I was mortified and didnt know how to respond so ignored him hoping he'd lose interest in the conversation. He didnt and kept on saying it....so I told him he mustn't say things like that as they can hurt peoples feelings. He got upset as he obviously doesnt understand why its inappropriate as he's only making an observation.
Then yesterday we were shopping in Tesco and he said very loudly, 'Mummy look...that lady has a big bottom!' the woman infront of us turned around and gave me such a look. I went bright red!
What's the best way to handle these situations? How do I explain to DS that it's rude to comment about people without him getting upset??

My DS who is same age says exactly the same things "that man/woman over there is really fat" or "is that a man" (when its a woman or vice versa!

I usually just ignore but then he says it louder and thinks i havent heard him!

I just get down to his level and say really quietly we must be careful what we say about other people because we might upset them.

Usually that stops him but it is so embarrassing!

Oh dear ...

DS told the world last week that mummy neeeded a poo whilst we were out shopping.

I just smiled serenely and tried to ignore him but he is only 2 so hopefully he wasnt very clear to understand.

I think at 3.5 just keep on doing what you are doing and he might get the picture.

it is really embarrassing ...

my ds pointed to a woman with checked trousers on a few weeks ago and said ..

look she's wearing her pj's ..and then after a short silence he said you are supposed to get dressed before coming to the shops you are not supposed to come out in your pj's otherwise people will laugh

when i said quietly its not her pj's he said well they look like pj's

I just try to take solace from the fact that everyone knows kids do these things and they dont mean any hurt ...

I hope

Ha! I used to have a lot of hair under my chin (I later bottled out and had electrolysis) and a small child said to her mother "Is that a man or a lady?" Mother "It's a lady." Child "But she's got a moustache!" Anguished silence from mother. Child "Do you call it a moustache?" To spare mother further embarrassment I smiled at the little girl and said "Lots of women have hair on their faces." I think generally people do understand that children don't mean to be rude or hurtful, and best immediate response from parent/carer is matter-of-fact, not "Don't say things like that" but "Everybody's different" or "People get lines on their faces when they are older because they have laughed a lot" etc etc. Then perhaps the conversation about appropriate comments can happen later in private (with children old enough to take it in, obviously).

Best thing to do is to acknowledge it subtly so avoid the repetition at louder volume but not make too big a thing of it and to explain that it's not nice to say things about someone as it might seem rude or hurt their feelings. Children that age are quite able to understand the concept of feelings being hurt, so try to go with that line!
My ds once called out Mummy look at that man mowing the lawn - at a woman!!

Thanks for the replies. I know most people expect it from small children but it's embarrassing none the less!
I think next time it happens i'll acknowledge the comment and then try and give a simple explanation. Hopefully as he gets older he'll realise it's not appropriate!

I need to work on this too with me 3.7 DD. I tend to get "why does that lady look so grupy mummy?" which is quite hard to respond to as usually she's right and they do need to lighten up a bit. Perhaps those people will reflect quietly on what she has said and try to mend their ways.

Best one recently was "Mummy look, that lady looks like Cruella!" sure enough, a mad mop of white hair and pretty mean expression (but thank God no black and white fur garments). I'm ashamed to say I just hurried her out of the shop