(anti)social skills at nearly 3

[normanthehairdresser]

DS is 3 next month. He's an only child and doesn't go to nursery though he does do toddler groups. He's always tended to be possessive about his things and space but has recently seemed much keener on others - several day visits to and from others' houses and to playgrounds etc where he has really played with other kids. Sharing is a dodgy concept but he can and will when reminded to.

However, we went over Easter to stay with a family with a 2.6yr old for 2 nights and a day out. They played beautifully together the first evening but the next morning something obviously went wrong - possibly that toddler2 didn't have his mummy around and was latching onto me - a major row blew up when t2 tried to pass me my shoes.

From then on DS was really difficult in his attempts to control what t2 was doing - lots and lots of 'X is not allowed to ...' 'shall mummy tell X no pushing/no biffing'. They had happily shared a bath on the first night but the second night DS refused to allow t2 into the bath with him and melted down at attempts to persuade - t2 then screamed the place down because 'I didn't have a bath with DS'.

Basically during the day, the second night and the following morning there were major attempts to control the other kid's behaviour, lots of verbals, refusal to have anything to do with him and rejection of any friendly overture, and serious meltdown if t2 tried to approach me or husband - 'X is not allowed to play with my daddy/mummy. No physical aggression thank goodness.

We made a sharp exit on the morning

Normal range for nearly 3? A bit unusual? Explicable by him being 200 miles from his comfort zone and knackered? Were my expectations completely awry in trying to arrange an overnight stay (first time we've done this)

If a bit unusual, what would you do to help him get his social skills up to speed?

Normal range for nearly 3. esp isf away from home and tired. If hes not had to do much sharing of his mummy before its hard for them. Trying to control the stranger sounds pretty normal, maybe a bit advanced for not quite 3. We get that a lot from my friends 4 yr old to my 3 yr old.

I would say it's normal. His behaviour was hard to deal with, I'm sure, but you've done well. It's hard for them to be away from home, tired, in strange environment let alone having to share his parents.

However, it's very hard for them to understand this 'sharing' concept. We always talk about taking turns, and swapping toys, and trying our best to put a positive spin on it otherwise, they associate sharing with something bad that they 'have' to do, like taking medicine or something.