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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Quick poll- what to do about my never-dry-at night 5YO!

24 replies

Pendulum · 16/04/2009 21:55

She has never had a dry night. Every now and then we take the pull ups away and have day after day of wet beds. She sleeps so heavily the wetness doesn't even wake her up.

I have read numerous threads on here and know there are two camps:

the night nappies encourage night wetting, take them away for long enough and she will learn; OR

there's no point taking them away until she is physiologically ready, evidenced by waking with dry nappies. This process can't be influenced by parental action.

So, I would be interested to know what is the prevailing Mumsnet view at the moment (and any tips also welcome ).....

OP posts:

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TartanKnickers · 16/04/2009 21:59

I would leave her in pull ups tbh. She'll do it when she's good and ready. My 7yo DS still wets. We've been down any roads and he is still wet. (Nothing physically wrong - he has been checked out). I am clinging to the hope that there can't be many - say 10 year olds - still wet at night.

blametheparents · 16/04/2009 22:03

I would leave her in pull-ups
DS was in pull-ups until 5.5, at that point he started having dry pull-ups and we took the pull-ups off and he has been ok ever since.
I know that overall we have been lucky and that many children take a lot longer to get dry, but I do feel that 5 is too young to take the pull-ups off if she is so wet and not showing any signs of being ready.

Othersideofthechannel · 16/04/2009 22:11

Leave her in pull ups.

DS has naturally started waking with dry nappies more and more frequently since he turned 6. We are almost ready to ditch them.

He didn't have a dry night until he was over 5.8

Original poster

Pendulum · 16/04/2009 22:15

Oh, replies... thank you!

I am suprised to hear you all say your DCs were/ are wet at least until the same age as DD. Do you think it is quite common? I had the impression all of DD's peers are dry at night, but maybe I'm wrong.

OP posts:

Othersideofthechannel · 16/04/2009 22:19

Quite common in boys.
Less common in girls but I don't think it is anything to worry about at 5.

asteamedpoater · 16/04/2009 22:26

My ds's paediatrician said to us today that about 15% of children are still wet at night at age 5, so not exactly uncommon.

Original poster

Pendulum · 16/04/2009 22:29

That's interesting, asteamedpoater. Is your DS still in pull ups too?

Did the paediatrician have any views on whether to intervene or stand back?

OP posts:

notnowbernard · 16/04/2009 22:32

DD is 5.4 and still in a pull-up at night

Has 1 or 2 dry ones a week

But sometimes they're sodden

And she will wee before bed and directly on waking

The times she's gone to bed without one (at her request) she's wet by 11pm witout realising (heavy sleeper)

Have been thinking on it but am going to wait a bit longer until the dry nights are more frequent

HTH

cluelessnchaos · 16/04/2009 22:34

I would leave her, my friends dd started having nightmares when she took her out of pullups, stopped again when she went back to them.

bellavita · 16/04/2009 22:36

DS2 is 9 and up until 18 months ago frequently wet the bed at night - we use the pampers bed mats in case of accidents.

We never used pull-ups though.

gigglewitch · 16/04/2009 22:37

Pendulum, Not long ago I was posting threads just like this, I was in this boat! All of a sudden during the school holidays at 5.5yo (less tired you see) we agreed to "try" no pull-up's for a night. He wasn't actually ever in dry pull-ups in the mornings but we decided to give it a go. I know some on here will say don't get them up for a wee, but it works for us/him. We don't do it with our other two dc, but this fella needs it. As long as we take him at around 10pm he stays dry.
Don't panic, maybe try the odd night pull-up free and see what happens. If no joy, carry on, no fuss, but the one night of success really motivated him and once he made his mind up he was on his way

StudentMadwife · 16/04/2009 22:39

sorry to kinda highjack the thread but ds1 is 5.2 and stil in pullups, sodden wet on waking. But he is 99th centile for height and weight and pampers size 6 getting too small. anyone recommened anywhere/any brands of bigger pullups?

bellavita · 16/04/2009 22:43

giggle - DH used to get DS2 up for a wee before he went to bed. Didn't always work and quite often he would still wet the bed despite doing a huge wee when lifted, but if it works for you then .

DS2 is able to wake up himself now if he needs a wee like last night when I came in from work at midnight, we met on the landing!

gigglewitch · 16/04/2009 23:01

S.M. - try the Dry-nites, they come in age 4-7 and the bonus is that they hold much more piddle than pull-ups, and are in more 'big boys' /girls' designs.

gigglewitch · 16/04/2009 23:03

Dry nites - we used the 'shorts' ones, buy em when on offer at the supermarket or buy with points on Boots card.

asteamedpoater · 17/04/2009 00:05

Hi, Pendulum,

Incontinence clinics will not consider seeing someone about nighttime bedwetting until the child is at least 7 years old, because up until that age, bedwetting is considered a pretty common phenomenon that the vast majority of children will grow out of without intervention of any sort. I think sometimes it is suggested to try taking your child out of pull ups in the hope they will learn more quickly to wake to a full bladder rather than have it leak out while they are asleep, but I don't think that advice applies if your child wets every night for weeks, fails to wake up even when the bed is soaking, and your ability to remain calm and unjudgmental is seriously affected!!! After all, if plenty of children still wet the bed up until the age of 7, that's because plenty of children under that age are genuinely not physiologically ready to stop wetting the bed until then, so wet beds and no nappies could go on for a very long time if you take them away now! The most important thing is for you to come up with a solution that allows both you and your child to remain calm about it, because if bed wetting becomes a point of anxiety for your dd, it will probably go on longer than it might have done otherwise for that very reason. That's why my ds is back in nappies and not lying in a soaking wet bed all night!

underpaidandoverworked · 17/04/2009 00:15

My son is 4.5 and I still put him on toilet before we go to bed - he is in such a deep sleep he doesn't wake up. Friends have said I shouldn't do it, but it works for us

What time does your dd have her last drink - we don't give drinks after 7pm as found the more ds had after that the more often he wet the bed.

I used to wet the bed till I was about 9 - apparently I used to be in such a deep sleep I just didn't wake up. Wouldn't worry about it - if dd sees you stressing it might stress her too. Also agree with earlier posts, leave her in pullups for now - she'll do it when she's ready.

Tommy · 17/04/2009 00:32

DS1 wasn't out of night time nappies til nearly 7. Don't make an issue out of it - just put nappy on until they don't want one.

gigglewitch · 17/04/2009 00:33

I think Tommy's got it tbh - it needs to be their decision

FAQinglovely · 17/04/2009 00:55

Needs to be their decision - and if it gets to the stage of them still wetting at 7yrs old and they go to the enuresis clinic they'll be told not to lift at night - yes you may get a dry night - but it doesn't actually help them learn to recognise their body's signs to say they need to wake up and wee/hold on until morning.

Of course you may find it "works" but chances are that's because the hormone has kicked in during the period of lifting - and probably would have done regardless.

(DS1 - 8.5yrs old still wet every night, DS2 5.5yrs dry for 2yrs now)..........

fortyplus · 17/04/2009 02:34

My two boys were HOPELESS so I sympathise.

My suggestion is make up the bed with two lots of bedding so that wetting wakes the child but you then strip the bed quickly and easily and have another dry lot of bedding all ready underneath.

You may find that your GP will help you now so I wouldn't wait till 7. You can get a nasal spray called Desmopressin which is a synthetic version of the natural hormone that concentrates our urine at night.

This seems like an awful problem at the time - especially when everyone else tells you their child has been dry since 18 months!

But it will be fine eventually - mine are 14 and 15 now and fortunately its been years since we had a wet bed!

Blackduck · 17/04/2009 06:41

I'm in the same boat and will post the usual link here

BTW also can run in families (I blame it all on dp as his family were all late including him )

FAQinglovely · 17/04/2009 09:00

lol forty - that's if the said child actually wakes up when they wet

Original poster

Pendulum · 17/04/2009 10:57

Yes FAQ- DD sleeps right on in her sodden bed!

OP posts:

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