I am going nuts over the behaviour of my 3 yr old dh. Since her sister has come on the scene she spends every free moment biting, poking, hitting, crushing her 6 month old sister. She's fine while I play/sit/interract with her which I do a LOT of the time but as soon as I go off to answer the phone/get dressed/get lunch all hell breaks loose. By the end of the day I want to wring her neck! I have tried everything (ignoring it, praising her endlessly for being nice to her sister, shouting, time out over and over and over ... taking her favourite toy away. The most effective so far is ignoring it/praising for being nice but this only works as long as I spend my whole day doing it and what seems like nothing else! I have tried to organize my day so that I spend most of it with my 3yr old which makes me feel guilty about my poor baby who's missing out.
Also, my baby was critically ill when she was a few weeks old so seeing someone hurt her seems to really hit home with me. We've just started a star chart but I'm not overly confident. Everyone tells me this is just a phase but I'm not sure I can take much more. I miss being close with my 3 yr old but this anger inside me is really affecting everything. I understand that she's had some major changes and am really, really patient with her but nothing seems to be enough. Help.