is this normal?

[mckenzie]

For the last few days my 22 month old DS has got hold of a toy in the morning (little car today, bus yesterday, bigger car the day before) and doesn't let go of it all day! If you try and take it away, he panics and get's all stroppy/upset. He lets go of it to eat and if I hide it, he'll just pick another car etc. I spend all day asking him not to put it in his mouth (he's still dribbling better than David Beckham so I guess still some teeth coming through) and we have a real fight on our hands to get him to leave it downstairs when it's bath time (tonight it was fairly easy as I just came down with a handful of the bubbles which he loves but last night he threw a horrible tantrum and was upset throughout his bath (which he loves).

Do I need to worry about this? Will he grow out of it? I'm concerned about these cars etc damaging his teeth - should I be?

Any help/advice gratefully received as always.

I twigged about 4 months ago, when DS hit 2, why they've got those shelves at nursery for 'transitional objects' - stuff from home to the rest of us! I know that other children attach to one thing, but my DS is similar to yours, and is quite ranging in his tastes.

One day it'll be a teddy, next day it'll be Thomas or Bob or his purse(or whatever favoured item is that day's Chosen Thing) that gets star treatment, but I've found it's definitely easier to work with it than against it.

For instance, it's much easier to suggest that Thomas would love to go to nursery, and wants to see how clever DS is at getting his coat on, than to try to prompt DS out of the house in any rational kind of way.

I never take the Chosen Thing away from DS (it's not worth the hassle) - instead for instance at mealtimes, I say that Thomas wants to sit on the tumble drier and watch, but wants to eat some of the tomato (or whatever DS doesn't like; it hasn't worked at getting DS to eat tomato yet, but hell you'll try anything once!!!).

At bathtime if the Chosen Thing is not waterproof, we point it out ("Thomas doesn't like the water - he'll get broken" ) and again take the 'watching from the sidelines' stance (from the top of the loo cistern). It can be useful, since when DS inevitably doesn't want to come out of the bath, I suggest that Thomas (or whoever) needs a cuddle.

Anyway, just wanted to let you know that you're not alone and your DS is not weird - mine does it too!!!

Oh - I forgot to add that I've never heard of a baby or toddler damaging their teeth through chewing on toys. Perhaps he's got some tricky molars giving him trouble at the moment - could you try teethers etc?

My ds's chosen thing of the last two days has been the hoover! (The full size one, not a toy). We've had loads of tantrums whilst I try to explain why he can't have it in bed with him, or take it out with the buggy.
Just bought him a toy hoover but I bet tomorrow the chosen thing will change for something completely different. (Hopefully not the ironing board!)

My boys, 4 and 2, both do it too. Ds1 frequently wants a Chosen Thing to take to nursery with him even though it sits outside the room in a basket all morning with everyone else's Chosen Things. Sometimes they arrive for a bath, to go to bed, to go out in the car with armfuls of Chosen Things each. not one of which do we have a hope of not taking with us. Unless, it is ridiculous (bluebear's ds's hoover would be in this category) I tend to go with it in much the same way as griffy. Some things just seem to me to be not worth the fight. I have enough that does need negotiation - whether their teeth have been cleaned, whether they have shoes on when they go out, whether they have their seat belts on etc without having more struggles on my hands.

I would try not to worry, it seems to be normal.

(Oh yes, and we take Mr Nobody everywhere we go too - and woe betide anyone who sits on him!)

I agree with all the other posts. Sounds very normal to me. just let him have it (whatever it is) for the day (and if it's not physically possible for him to have it then go with griffy's advice).

Bluebear, LOL!

My daughter spent at least the first 4 yearws of life with a plastic farm animal in each hand - it was difficult to seperate tham at all - She is 10 now and still likes them but just to a fairly normal degree.

I am sure that if she gets married I will have some wired into her bouquet because we always joked that she would be carrying them up the aisle!

Ds still doing it at 4, fortunately with relatively normal things, and I tend to let him bring whatever it is up to bath/bed as it can sit on the side and watch him get ready and it tends to make him a bot quicker...Dd nearly 2 is doing the same thing, but in a more bizarre way (tv remote, Ds's old potty) and has started to wear my or Dh's things too (hats, ski goggles, socks...). I just think of it as modified adult behaviour, I take my mobile everywhere, its one of my favourite things, always have a bag full of wierd stuff too....