DD is 6. She is a bright, lively-minded girl, but DH and I are becoming concerned about how lacking in empathy she often seems to be. Much of it is over apparently small things (hardly ever saying thank to us or others), but some of it, to us, at least, hints at deeper issues (lack of concern for others when they are tired, sad, hurt etc). I understand enough about child development to realise that (a) empathy develops slowly and (b) there is a huge range of variation in how quickly it develops, but I am beginning to wonder whether this is going to remain a pronounced trait in her personality and, if it is, what we can do to belp her. I had naively assumed that she would take her cue from her parents in learning how to deal with others, but, and I'm trying to be objective here, I think DH and I are on the empathetic end of the spectrum of emotional awareness and we both try hard to treat other people with empathy. DD has been having problems making, and keeping, friends recently and we suspect that all this may be part of the explanation. We are struck by the contrast with DS, only two, who often asks "Are you happy?", if one looks a bit sad or worried.
Should we just sit tight and hope she will grow in empathy, or should we do something more active than simply pointing out to her how her behaviour hurts other people?
And, yes, I would like to be told "Don't worry, they're all like that at six!