5 year old pooing his pants

[jobey]

Does anyone else have a child of this age that poo's his pants.It has been going on for over a year it's not something you talk about in the playground and I am wondering if it will ever end.First I tried making no big deal out of it,then when he seemed to think it was o.k I tried getting cross with him then he was hiding it to the point when he done it before school and spent the whole day with some in his pants.Then came the star charts he would remember and say look mum now can I have a star as soon as it stoped the pooing in the pants started again.I don't know what to do next.We have talked about it he isn't in pain when passing it.Any advice please.

Jobey, sorry i dont have the same problem as you but i do have a dd5 who only behaves when theres a starchart involved....we have had a month of starcharts, with a small toy at the end of each week and its working. Ill keep it up forever if it keeps the peace...just a suggestion. Sorry i cant help further. Good Luck

message withdrawn

Is he comfortable using the toilets at school ? We had a similar problem with ds when he went to a new school, but a bit younger at 3.5 - coincided with relocation and arrival of dd. It took a few months to resolve to the point of being reliably clean and dry. However we also felt that perhaps he wasn't happy using the toilets (are they the right height, small seats and clean) and too shy to ask when he really needed to go (especially during break time as he would need to ask to go back indoors).

We think he also used to hold it in as much as possible until he got home, as it is only this year (he is now just 5) that he happily poos at school,as and when he needs to go. Apologies if too graphic!

I can only suggest that you eliminate any potential environmental problems and keep going with the reward system. Does his teacher keep a look out for him too, does he/she or the classmates notice ? It is probably more common than you think.

Good luck,

LizS

My son, also aged 5, did the same, admittedly only twice, and it was the set up at school that was the problem. He was too shy to ask, he was too shy to even get up and go without asking, he said there were older boys in the cloakroom, the other boys in his class teased him, he didn't like the urinals (had lots of wee accidents) etc. etc. The school were not overly helpful (another story) but I suggested that he do the poo before or after school and he did seem to manage this. Star charts had no effect for him. Now he's been at school for a while he hasn't had an accident for quite some time and I think he has no problem with the toilet.

Are your ds's accidents all at school? If the star charts work I'd keep going with them but make him work harder for the same reward.

Presumably you've asked him why he does it? What does he say?