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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

What works ignoring or telling off babies around 15 months

13 replies

tryingtobemarypoppins · 07/02/2009 23:37

In general what works for.....

Throwing food on the floor (most days)
The odd face stratching - grabbing your nose etc. (once a week maybe)
Bashing baby chum with a brick etc. (depends on who it is grabbing his toys , maybe once a fortnight)
Shouting (every now and again)

Thoughts please.....

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

onadietcokebreak · 07/02/2009 23:41

oh god please someone tell me what works too.....the throwing food on the floor is doing my head in!

Mummyfor3 · 07/02/2009 23:45

Nothing works at that age !!!

I suppose, repeat No, and No, again, stay calm, keep thinking happy thoughts, take deep breaths and trust in the fact that they will outgrow this phase. All "naughty" behaviour at that age is in the interest of exploration, so maybe this is what will make you LO a rocket scientist one day...

IMO, your best chance of something working, is probably distraction.

Good luck !

RGPargy · 07/02/2009 23:46

DD only throws food on the floor when she either doesn't like what i've given her or she's full up. Having said that, i've never made an issue of stuff going on the floor for the simple reason that i didn't want her to think it was fun to chuck things overboard! She doesn't do it alot, thankfully. All i can suggest for it tho is to completely ignore it when it happens - if you dont react they will get bored (in theory!).

Face scratching i just deal with with a firm "NO!". DD gave my hair a massive yank today and that got a firm "NO!" too. She hasn't repeated that today so i think she got the message....

Sorry i've not been much help lol!!!

Nontoxic · 07/02/2009 23:49

Mainly remembering that they're babies and there's really no point 'telling them off' - distraction, tickling, singing, cuddling is definitely worth a try, but I can't think of anything else other than waiting for them to reach the next stage.

MadamDeathstare · 07/02/2009 23:58

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Nontoxic · 08/02/2009 00:04

MDS said it much better than me - it is to do with their perception of separation - and if they're incapable of understanding that their behaviour is 'naughty', how can they understand discipline?
That nose-biting thing was hilarious, btw.

HSMM · 08/02/2009 10:04

Say 'No' firmly. Then ignore them or distract them. Never let them see you pick up something they throw on the floor. (Doesn't work for me, but might for you )

SheSellsSeashellsByTheSeashore · 08/02/2009 10:14

DD2 is a nightmare for this. We have a dog and regardless of whether she is in the room or not dd2 will call her name and then if she comes she will hand her the food if she doesnt she will simply throw it on the floor.

If she gets annoyed she throws her food at you

She hits and nips when upset and cannot get her own way. Usually when she is being prevented from doing something dangerous, such as leave a retaraunt alone, while we are all still eating.

And as for shouting, well she doesn't bother much with that. She dives straight into the screaming and growling, whilst attacking you and attempting to throw herself on the floor.

She is a demon child. I can only hope she will grow out of it soon. Soft play areas help give me a break but when its time to come home she screams and kicks and scratches for upto an hour and nothing will appaese her.

Distraxting doesn't often help. Normally she will just throw whatever I am using as a distraction in the direction of my head.

YOu have my sympathy but I am afraid I don't have much help. Will watch this thread for tips though.

HeadFairy · 08/02/2009 10:14

I've been using the firm NO! with ds (17 months) and sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't. I think you just have to persist. Tone of voice is important. I make sure it's a really firm (practically shouting) NO! It's certainly enough to stop him in his tracks. I then call him over to me and when he comes I make sure I say good boy very enthusiastically and give him a big hug and lots of attention for the next few minutes to show him that by stopping what he's doing when I say, and coming to me he gets lots of praise and attention. Again, it's a bit of persistance that's needed really, it doesn't always work, sometimes I have to physically pull him away from whatever he's destroying doing.

charmargot · 08/02/2009 10:23

What I do:
Throwing food on the floor (most days). - take the food away! If results in a cry of "haven't finished" in 15 mth language I say "you can have it to eat, but not to throw on the floor" give one chance and take away. Also eat with child to show that's not what we do. Also catch just before a throw and say "mm, is that yummy?" or something to get them to put in mouth instead. Keep on the case and it'll stop eventually.
The odd face stratching - grabbing your nose etc. (once a week maybe). - take hands and say don't do that, kiss, cuddle or stroke instead. Remember if they're scratching you they'll do to other kids who won't be so tolerant. Show what you want them to do. They're only exploring, but need to know if it hurts you or could lead to hurt.
Bashing baby chum with a brick etc. (depends on who it is grabbing his toys , maybe once a fortnight). - get the other kid to return toy, pick up your child and remove from toys saying we don't bash people while you give the bashed a cuddle. Let your child come back but help them say sorry to other child with a cuddle or kiss .
Shouting (every now and again). If you don't like it say so and if it's really annoying you pick up and separate again.

If you deal with behaviour you don't like now you won't see it later. Don't ignore, but don't go off the handle as they really don't think they're doing anything wrong. If you don't want your kid to do certain things just reason with them and be consistent. Distraction is great, but there's nothing wrong with saying that you don't like a certain way of behaving.
If you don't like something you have to think what you want them to do instead and try to get that!

HeadFairy · 08/02/2009 10:53

With the throwing the food on the floor problem.... that's a real pain for us as we have a tiny kitchen so we can't feed ds in there, I have to feed him at the table in the living room which is carpetted. It's a total pain so I'm quite strict on it. I take food away if he throws it. When he complains I give it back to him but I get right down to his face and make sure he's listening and say "eat it don't throw it on the floor". To be honest, he usually throws food when he's no longer hungry or he doesn't like it. I also get round the situation by giving him little bits at a time, ie if he's having a satsuma he gets one segment at a time, which he eats happily enough. If I give him the whole lot he'll play with it and throw segments on the floor.

Nighbynight · 08/02/2009 10:56

agree, just say No and distract. They arent going to take anything more complicated on board at this age.

Also, only give food when your child is hungry enough to eat it. As soon as the high jinks start, whisk the food away quickly with the words "Ah, I see you have finished..."

Nontoxic · 08/02/2009 13:21

Charmargot - suggesting the behaviours you want rather than highlighting what you don't want is really sensible advice.
I used to say 'stroke Mummy' or 'cuddle Mummy' when things got painful - the word 'gently' in a soppy voice is also good, as is 'speak nicely' or something similar when they're shouting.
But these things rarely work straight away - positive re-inforcement of the behaviour you expect is a gradual process, which eventually will pay off.

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