Toilet training...I really need help...

[Poohbah]

Hi there,

My 3 year old doesn't want to wear a nappy but refuses to use a potty or toilet. Some girl at Nursery told him there were worms in toilets that would go up into his bottom and now he seems to have a phobia. He nows just wees himself. It's really hard, I've tried telling him there are no worms, he didn't believe me so I killed the imaginary "worms" with fairy liquid but still he refuses to tryto sit on the seat. I've also used a sticker chart and the usual things but he's a very determined child and I can't seem to talk him around either. Any suggestions???

dd was frightened of the toilet (not because of worms ) we took her to mothercare and let her choose her own special toilet seat thingy and a step, made a really big deal about how great/special /exciting this toilet seat was and she was fine.
maybe you could let him choose a special magic seat that kills all the worms?
i think with dd it worked because she had an element of control over it, she had chosen the seat herself iyswim?

Oh I now got him a new special seat with fishes on it and he likes the seat but still won't use the toilet! Thanks for your help anyway...he's a tough nut to crack is my son!

they all are, once they get an idea into their heads its a nightmare.

Will he sit on the potty if it's in another room, ie not the bathroom?
Or can you teach him to wee standing up? I've only got a DD so don't know how hard this would be but I know my parents trained my brother to wee standing up right from the start.

Good luck

yes the wee standing up is a great idea ds seemed to take to this himself a few months back and now only wees standing up i would def reccomend, he will sit on the potty for a poo but he has never yet sat on the loo i have no idea why have tried to persuade him many times but he just seems scared of it?? i may have to go and let him choose his own special seat and stool too as the one from his potty is a hard white plastic one and i know there are cool cushioned ones you can get.

Yes, he wees standing up in his pants, at night in my bed on me, or on the carpet or bath or in the shower but won't wee into the toilet or potty, even if he really needs a wee and is right by them!

He won't sit on the potty full stop, anywhere, at all.

He a bit hyperactive and has hearing problems but is very bright and has good language and comprehension. I think I've confused the poor chap in his efforts...do you think this will pass or is it a PROBLEM????????

Hi Poohbah
Someone suggested to me that if you put a table tennis ball in the loo they find it hilarious trying to hit it with their wee. My problem is not with wee just poo - will only do one in his pants. Now two months on
and feel like its going to go on forever!!

It DOES feel like it is going on forever doesn't it. Does it go on for ages????? I don't want my son getting a toilet poo phobia, my friend can't use public toilets still and she is 34!

i second the the ping pong ball in toilet. My ds(3) has a thing bout sitting on the toilet aswell and we tried everything. I decided to try to see if he'll do it standing up and so i bought a pack of those 'aim' balls as they were on offer and they seem to have done the trick ( at least in the wee department poo's are another matter!) and now he'll stand and wee in any toilet, ball or not! We just need to crack(no pun intended!{wink}) the poo's in pants.

Good luck with that - I feel resigned to a life of poo. Keep having dreams of a "I've done a poo in the loo mummy" and celebrations for the following three weeks. DS1 trained in about 30 seconds so now feel very humbled and really do believe the 'every child is different' that you got told by everyone constantly...

Clouds and Sunshine:- I feel reassured by that. I was feeling that I'm a bad mother but my son is definately impossible to "train".

I'm trying a bedtime story about a little boy who wouldn't go to the toilet. He asked for the story tonight so who knows??? fingers crossed for all our little pants poohers.