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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

my world of poo

14 replies

whitejude · 04/02/2009 19:19

I am now a desperate woman.
My DS (4.5) was supposedly potty trained age 2.5. She did it really quickly albeit with the odd wee accident. But it never really improved. Then it got worse, and now she sometimes soils too. I've tried sticker charts, ignoring it, getting really angry or being really supportive. At best she'll go a week or two without accidents and I think we've cracked it. Then it starts again and she can have up to three 'accidents' a day.
To make matters worse, DS2 (2.7)is also now out of nappies. She's not so bad with the wees but without fail does her poo in her pants.
I spend half the day in marigolds and I'm losing the will...
Suggestions please!

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Original poster

whitejude · 04/02/2009 19:24

sorry I'm new at this. When I say DS I do of course mean DD.

OP posts:

Coldtits · 04/02/2009 19:25

Does she get constipated?

TBH at her age I'd take her to the doctors.

Original poster

whitejude · 04/02/2009 19:30

No not constipated. I'm sure its behavioural and don't think GP would be much help.

OP posts:

acebaby · 04/02/2009 19:42

did this start when you started potty training DD2? Could she be copying her or experimenting? If so, she'll probably soon get sick of it.

Good luck and welcome to mumsnet!

Original poster

whitejude · 04/02/2009 19:44

hi acebaby
no its been an ongoing problem before that. I thought that potty training DD2 might help (she wouldn't want younger sister to do it better than her) but it hasn't made much of an impact, positive or negative.

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DesperateHousewifeToo · 04/02/2009 19:55

I also think constipation.

Bowels can get impacted with large, hard, dry poo and then the softer stuff leaks out around it- causing soiling.

It is not something they can control, hence sticker charts and getting angry does not work.

Search 'soiling', 'encopresis' and 'pooing'. There are lots of threads with loads of information.

Would suggest a chat with your gp.

acebaby · 04/02/2009 19:57

hi again

sounds like you are having a nightmare with this. I empathise because DS2 (only 8 months poor little thing) has had a bug and been excreting from both ends everywhere for a week and DS1 (3.6) still has accidents! So I'm living in a world of poo, wee and worse as well

Have you thought about involving DD1 in DD2's potty training? I find with DS1 that getting him to 'teach' DS2 about, say, car seat safety, crossing roads or not touching hot drinks is quite effective at getting him to behave.

Perhaps let her dole out stickers or explain to DD2 where poos belong next time DD2 has an accident.

Pitchounette · 04/02/2009 20:02

Message withdrawn

Original poster

whitejude · 04/02/2009 20:03

I do see why constipation makes sense but I really think its unlikely. TBH the main problem is the weeing in pants. Won't go to the toilet even thought she obviously needs to. Has a small wee in pants. The soiling tends to be when she's at nursery, hence I think its more behavioural. Do take your point though and will give it more thought.
And thanks acebaby; it is a nightmare which is what triggered my thread. Feel as thought I'm constantly wiping bums and mopping floors.

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Original poster

whitejude · 04/02/2009 20:06

Can't believe I'm going into so much detail. Maybe have to tell DD that her poos were subject of internet debate when she's older. She goes for a poo once or twice a day pretty much without fail. Mostly if she soils its after I pick her up from nursery (2 days a week). I think she doesn't take herself to the loo there and doesn't get reminded as much as if she's at home.

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DesperateHousewifeToo · 04/02/2009 20:37

Constipation can also cause wee accidents too because the impacted poo presses on the bladder.

Original poster

whitejude · 05/02/2009 19:12

have come back to this to see if anyone else out there has same problem. Have just read another thread where everyone thought this was usually constipation but am worried if I give her more to drink she'll have loads more accidents. What to do?

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DesperateHousewifeToo · 05/02/2009 19:29

If she is constipated, you may need to get something to help shift the blockage.

My gp was able to feel the bockage in ds' tummy when she checked him (by pressing down on his abdomen). He had lactulose which did the trick, others had movicol.

Ds still has problems, 18months on, if we are not careful with his diet.

More water will help to begin to regulate bowel movements once her bowels are clear.

If it turns out not to be constipation, there is an argument fro giving more drinks so that the brain has stronger messages that the bladder needs to be emptied, I think.

Original poster

whitejude · 05/02/2009 19:41

Yeah that all makes sense. Think I will go against my instincts and give them both loads to drink and see where that takes me.

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