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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Walking - how to encourage a three year old to do it!

38 replies

curlygal · 31/01/2009 19:42

DS is three (and a half actually) and is a total buggy addict.

Our lifestyle is such that I don;t see this as a huge issue at the moment (I know that some people do, so please refrain from telling me how your three year old walks five miles a day without complaint, thanks!)

I don;t have a car and I tend to walk everywhere, taking the bus when necessary. DS still naps most afternoons and I find the buggy useful for shopping.

However, I am feeling a lot of pressure to get him out of the buggy. Friends have made comments as have the nursery staff.

How can I encourage DS to walk a bit more? At the moment if I ever go out without the buggy (as I had to on Thursday when one of the wheels came off the buggy) he just whines and moans and asks to be carried so I end up carrying him, plus our bags all the way which I find hard as he is pretty heavy and we each have a fairly heavy bag with our lunch etc in. As a result I rarely go out without the buggy as I cannot cope with the moaning and the carrying.

I would be grateful for some tips, or some reassurance that he is not the only 3.5 year old who uses a buggy!

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

Blondeshavemorefun · 31/01/2009 19:47

as ds is used to being in the buggy of course he will moan and winge about walking

so start off with small short trips where he has to walk and build it up

if he moans and wants to be picked up say no and mean it and DONT pick him up, or he will learn that you said no, he moans and you pick up

techpep · 31/01/2009 19:49

My dd was in a buggy until she was 4 and a half, same situation as you, i didn't drive, walked into town, went out every day and she slept for a good 2 hours every afternoon (probably due to all the fresh air. By the time ds was born i was driving and his buggy was for the most part not used by the time he was 2ish. Are these people drivers? It is completely different when you dont have a car, i think when you do have a car it is more of a novelty for the child to walk and therefore enjoys it more. I wouldn't worry, it may get to the point where you have to throw away the buggy but i wouldn't consider that for at least another year.

snickersnack · 31/01/2009 19:52

dd hasn't been in the buggy since she turned 3, but she isn't really a big walker and she moans a lot when she has to.

However, at Christmas she walked nearly 4 miles without complaining because she was with her older cousins having fun and running around. This is not meant to be a "my child walks 5 miles" remark , simply to say that if she forgets she's walking, she'll walk a lot further. So, don't mention that you're walking, and distract him all the way. We have certain things we talk about when we're walking that keep her entertained and her mind off the walk - mostly what our imaginary boats look like .

Have you thought about a scooter? One of those ones with the two wheels at the front for stability. dd will scoot happily for quite long distances - it's pretty easy once they get the hang of it and not nearly as effort-ful as walking.

Ignore your friends, though. I'm sure they are doing all sorts of things you wouldn't approve of behind closed doors.

Habbibu · 31/01/2009 19:52

Bring along something he can push, and do short trips which you gradually make longer, to build up his endurance. Perhaps get a buggy board, so he can hop on and off?

nannynick · 31/01/2009 20:16

Let him wear a small child's rucksac - so he can carry things he wants to take with him / collect on route. If you need to post a letter, let him put the letter in his rucksac and let him post it when you pass a postbox.
Short walks with a 'reward' at the midway point can be useful - such as walking to a cafe where he gets a hot chocolate.

Original poster

curlygal · 31/01/2009 20:30

Thanks everyone.

Glad to hear from someone else with a similar experience to me techpep.

I think that DS would walk better if it wasn;t so boring - just me and him marching along trying to get to nursery, or to a friend's house or to swimming etc. He would definitely be better if there was an older child around to encourage him!

I;ve tried taking him out with the scooter (he has the three wheeled one) and with the toy buggy but he usually bores pretty quickly and I then end up carrying both him and the buggy/scooter!

We live quite a way from "civilisation" so it is a fair walk to even get out of the housing esate we live on, let alone to get somewhere interesting, which is part of the problem (I am currenly regreting going for the house furhter out of town as opposed to the flat closer to town!)

I will try with the scooter and buggy and his own wee bag to carry his own stuff in (and some of the shopping !)

OP posts:

notbusta · 31/01/2009 20:44

Have just got my DS (same age as yours) a balance bike that has revolutionised our trips to the shops! He was never very interested in his scooter either and was a real dawdler when we walked.

Original poster

curlygal · 31/01/2009 20:54

I am terrified by those bikes! i have considered getting one for DS if I could afford it but Edinburgh is very hilly so I worry that it would be dangerous? Is it easy for them to control and am I jut being a big wuus?

I do have a bike seat for him on my bike which is fine for going places but no good for shopping and not great if he falls asleep as I can;t nip in for a well earned coffee, just have to keep on pedalling!

OP posts:

myfeethurt · 31/01/2009 21:46

Ha Ha my 4 and half year old still loves her buggy, so do as I as I get impatient waiting for her to dawdle along and examine every twig / stone along the way, plus we are usually late for school. I am hoping she will be shamed into walking soon as she realises all of her peers have abandoned their buggies, but not too worried about it, I have thought maybe mums in playground are sniggering about the fact that I am still pushing her about. I will have to stop when she starts school.

Original poster

curlygal · 01/02/2009 10:09

MFH - I often think that I will end up pushing DS to school in his buggy - he'll be five by then though!

The buggy is the fastest way to get DS anywhere as we are usually late so dread to think what will happen without it.

Many of my friends gave up buggies at the age of two and make comments on how odd it is to see a three year old in a buggy! Usually when I have arrived with DS in his. Glad to hear that I am not the only buggy user.

OP posts:

starbear · 01/02/2009 10:22

Just one comment get bloody minded. Stick to it and he will get over it.

starbear · 01/02/2009 10:23

Oh! and get a trolley. Godsend!

Original poster

curlygal · 01/02/2009 10:33

A trolley? As in a wheeled shopping basket thing? Or as in an actual supermarket trolley?

I just don;t have the strength for a battle of wills....

OP posts:

Gorionine · 01/02/2009 10:36

I remember doing it Habbibu's way, with something to push and ending up carrying DD1 AND plastic shopping trolley all the way back the good old days...

I think if you decide to go for a little walk with your DC, just do not mention the pushchair at all, get him ready and go out of the door holding his hand and just go for it! Hide the pushchair if you need to! Start with a very short walk and build up gradually.If he is not used to walking at all starting with a mile long trip will be too much for him.

It is a good idea to try and get him to walk now as he is definitely still young enough to get into the habit. We once had my SIL and my niece who was 9 at the time staying for a week with us. She lives in town and was not used to walk at all she had a shock when she walked the DCs to school with me ( 1 mile and I do not drive so there was no compromise possible) She started to complain before we had reached the top of our street! moaned all the way there and back) It was no surprise for me when she asked to not come with us and stay at ours with her mum for the following school runs! She is now 14 and still hates walking!

starbear · 01/02/2009 10:40

Old ladies trolly in tartan! It depends on how you feel about you kids fitness! Strong bones etc..Your kid your life. BUT..... My kid walks as we are a walking family. Hill walking and tourist city walking. My Ds's Aunt, Uncles, grand parents and cousins walk so does he. Mine would be real fat other wise as the other family hobby is cooking and eating.
ha! ha!

Servalan · 01/02/2009 10:42

With DD I make up little songs about walking to encourage her to stay on her feet instead of begging to be carried.

I also play games with her like "lets walk... and... STOP!" - It can be varied with things like jumping, creeping, marching etc. to make walking fun.

Gorionine · 01/02/2009 10:47

I love your method Servalan!

Servalan · 01/02/2009 10:54

Thanks - it's been really effective with DD - generally she forgets she was whinging about being carried straight away!

silentlywondering · 01/02/2009 11:02

DS broke his buggy so I refused to buy him a new one. He has had to get used to walking as he is too heavy for me to carry. DD holds his hand and we sing together as we walk. We sing the grand old duke of York marching up and down hills and have little races to see who can get to the next tree/lampost first when on the flat. It keeps them entertained and stops me tearing my hair out.

silentlywondering · 01/02/2009 11:03

Ohh sorry forgot to say he turned three in September!

peanutbutterkid · 01/02/2009 11:13

Reassurance? How's this: My 9yo DS will still leap into a buggy on days he feels ill, is off school and doesn't feel up to treking up to the school and back (up to 3x/day, I have to take/fetch the others).

Generally I turf them out at age 4.5yo. I do a lot of fast walking (and, er, they don't ). I don't have the time and nerves to wait for them. I know one lady whose 3yo is walking fast seemingly everywhere, and I am impressed. I have only observed the girl stropping about once, but I bet that wasn't the only time... And that's that little girl, it's not what my DC are like.

Even now DS4yo stops and natters about everything, demanding detailed conversation before we can proceed, or falls down frequently and then can't progress at all, etc. Scooter didn't work for us, DS wouldn't ride it or tended to fall off it just as often.

People who make negative comments about it are just plain RUDE.

muddleduck · 01/02/2009 11:20

I second the balance bike.

We got one for ds1 for his 3rd b'day which was just when he was getting bored of walking.
Best money we ever spent.
We have a puky and it is great.

ChippingIn · 01/02/2009 12:09

^DS is three (and a half actually) and is a total buggy addict.

Our lifestyle is such that I don;t see this as a huge issue at the moment...However, I am feeling a lot of pressure to get him out of the buggy^

If this isn't an issue for you then don't worry about it, when rude people make comments just smile and ignore them (easier said than done I know) but this is your DS, it's not hurting him or anyone else. Frankly, if someone were to offer to take me everywhere in a pushchair I know I wouldn't be offering to walk!! and had they been doing it for 3.5 and suddenly wanted me to walk I'd be pretty annoyed too!!

However, as the question you actually asked was how to encourage him to walk (when you are ready). Do NOT carry him, not ever. Tell him he is far too big and heavy to be carried, if you relent sometimes then this just encourages the whinge factor. Bribe - start off getting him to walk to places he really wants to go and tell him if he is a goodboy (no whinging and moaning or dragging his feet)walking there he can ride in the buggy home. Harp on the BIG BOY treats, only babies ride in buggies etc.

But as I said... when you are ready, not anyone else!

Gorionine · 01/02/2009 12:37

Curlygal, I agree with ChippingIn that is has to be when you are ready as well, I missed the bit of your OP when you said you felt pressurised to get him to walk. I thought you wanted him to walk. in that case, I would suggest Servalan's way but only when you have time on your hands and feel relaxed enough to deal with possible wingeing, tantrums, definitely do not try it on the way to nursery to please people and show them he can do it as it would without a doubt be a very stressful nursery run.

LucyEllensmummy · 01/02/2009 13:41

my 3.5 year old loves her buggy too - she starts school in september so hoping to break the habit over the summer. I am hoping that scooters and bikes will be the way to go. I am much the same as you, walk everywhere and i walk a long way too. I do wonder if it is very easy for people who drive to have a child walk as they never walk that far (on the whole), whereas sometimes i have to walk miles and would be unfair to expect DD to do it so have always used push chair, sometimes she likes to walk but whenever ive gone out sans buggy its been a disaster

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