23 Month old not talking

[Frasersmum123]

I have my 18-24 month review on Monday, and im dreading it. DS2 is a clingy child who doesnt talk - he also doesnt like socialising and will completely ignore anyone else apart from me or DH.

He can say Mummy, and does chat to himself, but doesnt say anything else.

Should I be concerned? Is this normal? My DS1 was very quick to talk and had a full vocabulary by 2, so im worried that I am being unfair on DS2, but I am worried.

Hi Frasersmum

My DS2 was exactly the same. He had about 10 single words (not Mummy though) and did not really interact with anyone but me and his dad, not even really with DS1.
He is now 3.5 and he has come on leaps and bounds, although I will say that he is slightly behind his peers still.

I spoke to my HV and he was referred to SALT at 2. He has reviews every 4-6 months and he also goes to pre-school which has helped his speech and socialising skills no end.

Does he understand simple commands, such as 'where are your shoes?' If I remember, understanding is more important than speech at this age.

Thanks Poshpaws.

He doesnt understand verbal commands, such as 'where is your coat', but if I get his coat and show it to him he will hold out his arm to put it on - I dont know if that counts though?

Some children do start talking very late, and catch up very quickly without outside help. But by 2 I would be looking for a speech therapy referral - you can always cancel it if he starts to make good progress with his speech. Speech therapy isn't at all scary or traumatic for a young kid = it will just be a nice (usually lady rather than man) playing with him and getting him to look at pictures.

In terms of understanding verbal commands - it doesn't count if you give any visual clues - as kids can pick up meaning from what they see rather than from the words.

In the meantime there's things you can do at home
1)if he imimates well, try some baby signing classes or sing and sign dvds - if you sign along with speech that can help with learning new words

2)surestart centres sometimes run courses to help you help your kid with language - I went on one, caled "you make the difference" and found it very helpful

3)some useful websites:- www.teachmetotalk.com (has useful videos and info)

www.ican.org.uk (can send off for free for postage DVDs about helping your child communicate).

4)Baby Talk by Sally Ward is meant to be good, and likely to be in your library.

My dd1 hardly talked at all - for years. She now (aged 10) excels at communication. So I don't think not talking is naything to worry about per se but I think you do need to get things checked out just in case. Are you 100% that he can hear normally?

oh yes, very good point about getting his hearing checked.

does he normally point to show you what he wants etc?

Thanks Totalchaos - should I push hard for a referal?

I would, as the waiting list can be several months in some areas. Probably worth checking with local speech therapy department what the procedures are - not all areas make you go via HV/GP - some let parents refer direct.

I agree with TC and NL- certainly get his hearing checked first.

Also, as TC said, showing him the coat is not the same as him going to get the coat or pointing to where it is. TBH DS2 did not understand simple commands at 2 but did by 2.5. DS1 and 3 understood them by 18 months.

Does he point out anything of interest to you/anyone? What are his non-verbal communication skills like?

My DS2 gave me the same concerns until he turned 2. It was almost like someone flicked a switch then and suddenly he started making huge daily progress. Its all a bit unclear and only 2 or 3 words together, but he's talking.

My best friends son never said any proper words well past hius 3rd birthday. If i mentioned it she would get defensive, but one day when he was 3.5 she HAD to go and see a doctor as it was so obvious he was having problems. He sounded exactly like a deaf child when he spoke IYSWIM. (and when i say "spoke" it as more like just sounds). It turned out his hearing was really poor due to lots of ear infections in infancy. He had an operation to remove tonsils, addenoids and had grommits put in. After a year of speech therapy to "relearn" how to speak he sounded completely normal. Now at 6 years old he is top of his class. But strangely, although his hearing was so bad, no-body ever knew! He still reacted in ways he should have to things..... strange.

Def get your sons hearing checked. xx