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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Is it normal for a 12 month old to have tantrums?

19 replies

chloejessmeg · 23/01/2009 13:21

Hadn't exepected to have this problem yet.

I am talking, not getting what she wants and then screaming the place down, refusing everything, hitting, throwing herself on the floor, kicking legs etc?

Bit worried as even after working in nurseries I have never seen a young this age do this?

Hoping it is just where she is frustrated where she isn't quite walking etc and will pass, but wanted to ask incase I should be worried?

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plonker · 23/01/2009 13:22

IME its normal ...and it gets worse

claireybrations · 23/01/2009 13:24

DD did and DS does too so normal IME. It gets a bit better once they start to be able to express themselves more...

JohannaF · 23/01/2009 13:25

DD is 14mths and started tantrums just after first bday. Really do think it is normal. Lots of character!

tumtumtetum · 23/01/2009 13:26

Yes.

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 23/01/2009 13:28

oh ok, thats ok then. I am not bothered, I just wanted to check it wasn't really odd. lol. She is tiny too so got lots of funny looks today when screaming the place down!

OP posts:

claireybrations · 23/01/2009 13:28

Oh dear plonker, does that mean it will get worse again??

tumtumtetum · 23/01/2009 13:29

I have heard anecdotally that the sooner they start the terrible twos behaviour the sooner they are out of it...

Fingers crossed

plonker · 23/01/2009 13:31

I can only speak from my own experience, but ermmm ...yes

noonki · 23/01/2009 13:35

oohhh yes (esp if they have a toddler big sibling to copy!)

noonki · 23/01/2009 13:36

and best advice is to
a) distract
b) ignore

otherwise by 18 months they will realise that it gets lots of attention and then the fun really begins

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 23/01/2009 13:37

Yes, I hope she gets out of it soon, she is getting a baby sister in april so will be more stressful when she is starting the other one off

OP posts:

MmeLindt · 23/01/2009 13:40

DD started on her first birthday, she had a huuuuuge tantrum about not managing to get her dollys buggy through the door. Massive strop which ended in me yelling, "That buggy is going STRAIGHT BACK TO THE SHOP!" to my mother's unending amusement

DS did not really have temper tantrums until he turned 2.5yo and he is now 4.5yo and is slowly getting over the phase.

I would say, based on our experience that DD was easier to handle, her tantrums were over quicker. DS is very strong minded.

trixiethepixie · 23/01/2009 14:03

My 14 month old started tantrums this week and I thought they weren't meant to start until about 18 months. Silly me.
Throwing himself back on the floor, beetroot red, arms and legs kicking, screaming his head off. I have to say I found it quite funny as it looked so ridiculous but could see how it would wear thin, especially in public.
I try to distract him to avert the tantrum but if it doesn't, I totally ignore him until he's calmed down. No attention for bad behaviour.

Original poster

chloejessmeg · 23/01/2009 14:48

Well today we were out when she did it - worst one so far. We were meant to be somewhere for 11am and had planned to walk. Chucked it down with rain so waited a bit longer and got in the car. Multistory car park, DD decides she does not want to sit in buggy. She was throwing herself around so much I couldn't physically get her in a strapped into the buggy to get going. Took about 10 mins to get her strapped in enough to be safe, but still not in properly, so I could at least get going. Was late anyway but she calmed down after stopping at the shops for some buscuits . Got lots of looks though and her screams comepletly echo'ed - especially in car park. Then after all of it, she fell asleep before we got home which is really annoying as had to wake up to get in car (hence why I prefer to walk) and then it messes up her naps when we get in.

OP posts:

meandjoe · 23/01/2009 17:19

deffinitely normal in my experience. my ds started doing this from the moment he could crawl, as soon as i took something off him or moved him away from someething/ tried to pick him up, he launches in to a full blown tantrum!

MmeLindt · 23/01/2009 17:21

DD used to arch her back so that I could not get her into the buggy. Complete nightmare.

Don't worry about anyone else when dealing with a tantrum. Concentrate on your DD and ignore the looks. Most of them are probably remembering their own DC at that age and are glad that they are not the ones dealing with it. The ones who are really disapproving are too old to remember their DC at that age.

fruitful · 23/01/2009 17:33

Yep, ds2 is doing this (13mo). Fortunately he is number 3 so I am well practised at ignoring and distracting.

My other 2 started later so I'm glad to see it isn't unusual.

tumtumtetum · 24/01/2009 12:08

Ha chloejess that's what DD does as well - it was worst when she was about 13 months.

The looks you get in the middle of a shopping centre when pressing your knee into your childs chest to try and get them strapped in are not good!

Now she's 18 months it's better because I explain which bits she will walk and which bits she will buggy - ie you'll go in your buggy up to the shop and round the shop and then you can walk home and she nods and smiles.

Ewe · 06/03/2009 21:56

My almost one DD has started tantrumming over the last week, it's hideous, is there any way to 'treat' it so they don't do them anymore?? Hopeful

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