how do i handle a 3 year old who has turned fussy and wont eat!

[BONKERZ]

im not sure if im dealing with it right!
I know all 3 year olds go through this phase, my DS certainly did and so did DSD but im doubting my parenting right now with DD.
She turned 3 in Dec and has always been a brilliant eater but for the last few weeks she has got more and more fussy with food.
She hasnt eaten a full meal in days and sometimes is eating nothing of her meals.

Currently im being quite strict with her, if she does not eat all of her small (have hugely reduced the size) dinner then she gets nothing else at all. this does not seem to phase her.
I have tried sending her to bed if she doesnt eat her tea but now all i get is that she is tired so she doesnt have to eat.
Today all she has eaten all day is
10 grapes, 2 crackers, a slice of cheese and 2 slices of salami. she refused to eat her pasta and pesto which is something she normally loves.

should i carry on with the 'not eating dinner means nothing else' and hope that eventually she will realise? i know kids dont starve themselves deliberately but im worried she really isnt eating properly! Or do i allow her to graze all day and leave off giving her cooked meals for a while? i know she would happily snack on fruit and veg all day and could make batches of cold pasta etc or would this be playing into her hands?

Sorry bonkerz, no wise words from me, my dd is going through the same the past few days, it's driving me mental and I have no answers!

So bumping for you and watching with interest!

BONKERZ, my ds was three in October. He previous ate almost anything, and one by one dropped all his favourites until there was only one meal he would eat (macaroni cheese) and the rest was bread/crackers/fruit/yogurt etc.

If he was sitting down to a meal with us, I would take the eat it or you get nothing else approach, but at lunch and snack times, I would make sure I offered him something (healthy) that I knew he would eat. I tried really hard not to make a big deal of it, and asked DH to do the same.

Then, just last week, he has started eating again, in huge quantities often asking for more, and saying that he is hungry even though he has had meals and snack.

So, the "it's a phrase, it will pass" mantra rung true for us, and probably will for you too.

Good luck.

thanks for the replies, i think it is a phase but is so frustrating!!!!

have you tried offering choices and getting her involved in making it , making meal time more positive than stressful, maybe you can say" wow you helped cook food and now we can eat it together thank you"

also remember its 9 tablespoon altogether to be appropriate dinner size my son went through this phase but got him to help cook and lots of praise and i think the negativity of it all went

if that doesn't work just don't show her it bothers you as it could be a way of getting a reaction just ok off you go then she is obviously eating in the day time so maybe do cooked lunch and light tea i had to do this for a while too

i have always done cooked lunches and she has always eaten well but just lately has been saying no to cooked food even at tea time. We went shopping today and she chose her tea but still did not eat it, she asks for things and helps make lunch etc but still does not eat. She has even started eating 2 crisps from a packet and saying she doesnt want them.
we made banana loaf the other day and she was going on about eating it and then said she didnt want to.

im not sure if i should stick to 3 set meal times with fruit in between and risk her only eating the fruit or do i drop the meals altogether and let her graze all day?

to be honest my ds did go through this phase and i kind of let him eat what he wanted and would give toast before bed it lasted few weeks but did go back to normal it was stressful as the routine as you know it has upped and left and your left in limbo

but i idd this for a while and one day tested with a meal and he ate it and it went up from there just put healthy snacky food about and ket he r graze for your own peace of mind but if she was that hungry she would eat her dinner so lets hope the phase doesn't last too long

you don't want to cause stress at meal times as she will associate this all the time with meal time and could continue being finicky i paid no attention still made very small dinner but didn't fuss when he didn't eat it

sorry for typos hope you can make out what im trying to say my son keeps waving phone in my face to play games lol