If you were a fairy, what trait would you bestow on your dc?

[snoopyatemyblanky]

Remember the story of sleeping beauty? At her Christening the fairy Godmothers assembled and each one bestowed a special trait on her: good looks, a loving nature, intelligence, etc.

So which one trait would you bestow on your child if you could?

Personally I would wish for my DD to be generous: with emotions, love and support for others.

are we talking about the traits we would want to bestow on any baby at birth because they're important, or traits we wish our own children had more of?

If I were the fairy godmother at birth with no knowledge of how the actual baby would turn out- then I would say empathy.

but I think both my dcs have a fair bit of that, so don't need to wish for it.

For my actual dcs- I'd like dd to be
have health/not be disabled and ds to have more self-confidence. Not because I think unlimited self-confidence is always a good thing, but because he could do with some more of it. And I don't think health is the meaning of life; just the department where dd is obviously lacking.

but in general: empathy is good

My first reaction was the same as psychomum's - tidiness! I haven't been upstairs and looked at their bedrooms yet - I need to be a little stronger before I face that particular challenge.

But then I did start to wonder whether choosing that trait was more for my benefit than theirs, so have had a rethink, and I would choose:

For ds1 - organisation.

For ds2 - confidence and the knowledge that he is a worthwhile person (to counteract the effects of past bullying).

For ds3 - a bit of self-control and a longer fuse.

For all of them - common sense.

Yes Cory, but too much empathy can be a bad thing (imho) my DD has soooo much empathy she considers others needs far more important than hers and struggles hugely to ask for what she needs (a person to play with in the playground, as a toddler - you want the toy I'm playing with, please have it even if it really upsets me to give it to you etc) also she can be very upset by life/world events even if they have no direct impact on her.

So maybe empathy with resilience and a thicker skin.

This is really lovely to read, just all these wishes and hopes. Keep going!

any child - happiness. DS specifically - communication (he has delayed language)

I am torn between 'health' and 'getting dressed a bit damn faster in the mornings'.

If I was really a fairy I would probably be more objective.

Cory, I haven't actually thought of that yet. You know, from birth or now. I guess anything goes. For me it's from birth bc my DD is only 14wks old.

I agree MarmadukeScarlet, resilience is good to have. Your son is special, not different.

Marmaduke, you're right. Wasn't it Aristotle who said that every virtue if taken to excess turns into its own particular vice? Very true.

On further consideration I don't think there is a single trait that I would want them to have in unlimited quantities. Not even happiness or joyfulness. Perhaps not even health.

I want them to have a full experience of being a human: that includes suffering, feeling better, getting things wrong, getting them right, empathising, standing up for yourself- and for others.

Just perhaps slightly better health for dd then. And a little more self-confidence for ds.

Everything in moderation

resilience. and if i can have two too...compassion.

Can't decide between cheerfulness and kindness!

Patience and tolerance here as well Especially of her sister LOL! Nothing else though

I was going to say "an ability to sleep from 7pm until about 10am" but I read the other comments and am not ashamed!

I wish for self confidence for her, and empathy too.

I have little self confidence and too much empathy (maybe) so a balance of it would be nice for her.

I like resilience. It's a fascinating trait that some kids have so much more of than others.

Do you know what? DD's fariy Godmothers did a damn good job.

So I would like to bestow happiness on DS1.

Patience.
And if I could have two - control of her temper

I would want to wish my children to be easily likable. I think I need a stronger word than that but I can't think of it.

Compassion. Which I think she has...just hope she holds onto it as she gets older.

A sunny nature = the ability to look on the bright side. Not only a blessing for the child but for everyone else they encounter.

DH says empathy

I'd like my dd to be able to see the positive in evertything

... or maybe the ability to type accurately

Grace - the ability to make others feel comfortable and easy.

Self-Worth and Good Health

Energy and kindness.

Self confidence. The French have a great saying - "bien dans sa peau" - to feel comfortable in your own skin.