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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

Boys and their toys.

10 replies

coolbeans · 09/01/2009 09:13

My ds has just turned three.
Recently, he has taken to pretending to play with a gun, swords, making "pow, pow" noises etc. etc.

I'm not sure where he gets it from - he's not allowed to watch anything more innocuous than CBeebies or something like the Jungle Book - and I don't know why I find it disturbing. I mean, I don't like guns, (who does?), but it seems to affect me in a way that I suspect is a bit OTT.
I won't buy him a toy gun, but he's already made one out of his lego bricks- I don't think I've ever seen him so focused on a task.
Ah - don't know what I want from this post. Maybe some reassurance that it's all normal? He's a very boisterous little 'un, but he's got his sensitive side too....

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Lizzylou · 09/01/2009 09:16

He is normal.
I have two DS's , one almost 5, the other almost 3 and they amaze me with their "I'm going to kill you" etc whilst playing (in DS2's case, with teddies sometimes!).
It's a boy thing, last year DS1 suddenly was a Powerranger all the time, despite never having seen cartoon/played with toys, just picked it up from Preschool.

belgo · 09/01/2009 09:18

sounds perfectly normal to me. And he's very bright to make a gun out of lego at age three! I wouldn't worry too much about it. Don't buy him any guns if you don't want him to have them, but I wouldn't make an issue about him pretending to play with guns, sword etc.

CharleeinChains · 09/01/2009 09:18

It is normal, my children have never been given a toy gun (and never will) and they like your son don't watch anything worse than kids programes (and ds1 watched wwe wrestling) but they still make gun noises and have pretend sword fights. Just be gald he is using his imagination.

milsna · 09/01/2009 09:53

aww I know how you feel! I hate it when we go round a friends house, she has an array of toy guns for her kids my ds loves it! I was running round with one shooting at everything... I know people say ah its harmless fun, but it just makes me feel uncomfortable! but trying to also think that it just growing up etc ...

belgo · 09/01/2009 09:55

Just to reassure you, my brother played with toy guns as a child, and is now the biggest pacifist possible.

Kammy · 09/01/2009 16:12

Classic quote from my (very sensitive) ds when he was 4.

'Can I have a gun?'

'No'

'why'

(explains at length why I don't want him to play with guns)

'Mummy, I don't want a real one, only a toy one'

stealthsquiggle · 09/01/2009 16:17

'tis normal.

However, unreasonable or not, I have an absolute rule than pointing things (including fingers) at people and saying 'bang' or otherwise playing 'pretend' guns is not on and will not be tolerated in my house.

DS(6) gets it to the extent that he doesn't do it at home any more, but no doubt he still does elsewhere.

I gave up trying to analyse why I reacted so strongly and just went with it.

(and he has a Buzz Lightyear 'zapper' which I sanctioned - how inconsistent is that, FGS )

AMumInScotland · 09/01/2009 16:25

I can reassure you it's totally normal, even if you think you've kept them away from that kind of stuff, they will pick it up from others. I didn't let DS have guns, but once he got to nursery he was playing "power rangers" with the rest of them and would point and shoot. So long as they don't seem to be obsessed with it to the exclusion of everything else, it doesn't cause them any harm. DS is now 15 and still a pleasant, sensitive soul, who would never dream of using violence against anyone and is not that interested in violent films or games. We never had guns but did have light sabres, and a few blow-up swords and axes from fairgrounds. He also had Action Men which had their own little guns, but my compromise on that was that he never had one where the gun was moulded to the figure, so they could always put on jeans and go camping or rafting instead .

Seriously, it's not a big issue, and is totally normal for small boys to do this. It's just pretend, and has no connection with real violence either now or in the future.

Pheebe · 09/01/2009 17:54

Very normal, we managed to get to 3.5 without the gun issue raising its ugly head, despite having water guns every summer since he was born . DS1 (now 4) calls 'proper' guns 'killers' and talks about killing you. He's picked it up at nursery. We ignore or say thats not kind and won't engage in those games but we certainly don't try and stop him or make an issue of it despite how much I hate the whole male violence thing.

nappyaddict · 27/02/2009 01:24

Those of you who refuse to buy your children guns what about

swords
light sabres
water pistols
bows and arrows (you know the ones with the suckers on)

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