Can someone please remind me what you do with a 19 month old who hits and throws stuff?

[FAQtothefuture]

DS3 has a habit of walking up to someone and tapping them (fine), but then keeps tapping getting harder and harder until he's really whacking them (not so fine).

He's also decided that chucking things (particuarly wooden blocks and small metal cars) around is jolly good fun .

I've tried distraction, I've tried moving him away, I've tried telling him off in a firm voice........but no matter what I do he just laughs/giggles at me, and then seconds later repeats.......

What do I do??? I'm dreading him becoming one of those toddlers you read about on MN that everyone complains about at toddler group because of hitting/throwing.

Hi ya, at 19 months being able to throw things is a brilliant new found skill. How about we dont throw cars, we throw 'give him something that he is allowed to throw ie a ball or whatever.

When he taps someone is it to get their attention?

well he's been able to throw balls for quite a few months now (sadly for the rest of us throwing was a relatively "early" development for him). I've tried giving him a ball, he'll throw it once, then head back to bricks/cars/anything else that's hard and shouldn't be really thrown and chucks that instead.

Taps occasionaly for attention (although that's usually tugging for attention), sometimes just for a laugh. He has been known to walk up to one of us (myself, DS1 or 2) and just whack them full pelt for no reason at all and then stand there and giggle.

You'd think I'd know this all ready wouldn't you - he's my 3rd

Not at all, i have 3, big age gap between them, id forgotten it all!

I do however remember my now 4 year old, throwing things he shouldnt. I used to just keep telling him, you dont throw bricks, you throw balls and replacing the brick with the ball until he got the hang of it.

Older brothers and sisters? do they play rough with him and laugh when he hits them (i had this with my older boys)

they don't really play too roughly with him, and definitely don't laugh, in fact he's had DS2 in tears quite frequently if he's taken something with him to whack with !

So is it just a case of repeatedly telling him to stop, giving him something else then?

I don't think either of my other 2 threw stuff like he does - although I seem to recall DS2 went through a biting stage - frequent visitors used to freeze up if they saw him heading towards their legs

sleepy - I've tried the firm and serious telling off and plonking on naughty step.......where he sits and giggles for a bit and then gets off and repeats. I can stick him back on it 20 times and get the same response each time........so not sure the naughty step is going to work with him (or at least not for now until he stops finding it a game LOL)

oh yes - he's old enough to understand, but if I take the toy off him he just goes and gets another, and another, and another.......they all pretty much play with the same toys (bricks and cars obsessed the lot of them) so taking toys away from him is also taking them away from the other 2 DS's.

arghhh - the problems of having more than one child

He's sat in the toy box carefully (ironically given what this thread is about) taking the toys out and putting them carefully on the floor

I suppose it depends, if he is throwing things at other kids, you wouldnt want to replace a brick with a ball really. The message should be you dont throw anything AT someone.

I would just take away ALL the cars or ALL the bricks, so he couldnt throw them. Put them up somewhere out of reach for half an hour, then you can have them back if you dont throw them. Give them back, if he throws them, take away again.

See that's where it gets confusing (and hard) DS1 and 2 also spend a lot of their time (when at home - at school right now obviously) playing with the cars (probably 100+ including the ones that are upstairs - which keep gettig sneaked downstairs) and bricks as well. And I'm worried about them feeling they're being punished by taking them away.

hmmm yeah i see what you mean. You will just have to take the things away from him, that he throws and hopefully he will get the message and you wont have to take away all 100+ cars!!

yes - thanks for your help. I'll just have to hope it's a phase that doesn't last too long.

Suppose I'd better go and get the other 2 (well actually think just one - think DS1 has choir this afternoon) from school so carnage can ensue here............

Most definately a phase, my ds went through it. If he is still throwing at 18, worry!!

Good luck