Over emotional DD HELP!!!!!

[cocolepew]

My DD is 11 today and has spent most of the day crying, over Nintendo Dogs . She's scared they will run away/die or whatever and now wants to take the game back to the shop. We also have to get rid of her Pixel Pet for the same reason.

I know she has problems with anxiety(sp?) but I don't think I always handle it right, I don't want to indulge it but I think then I'm being too harsh.

She doesn't cope well with change in routine and wants to be back at school. She's going to High School in Sept. and I'm worried she'll be bullied if she can't control her emotions. Though she seems to cope better at school.

Her social skills are lacking somewhat, but she is well liked by adults.

Anybody in the same boat?!?

PPPLLLEEEAASSEEE

;

I tried to answer a minute ago but blinking PC crashed.

My idea was... get her to write down everything that is worrying her, in bullet points. Then go through each point one by one and discuss what is the worst that could happen, how likely it is that that thing will happen, etc.

It sounds like her thoughts and emotions are spiralling out of control so to see her anxieties in black and white might help her to get a grip on a situation rather than reacting emotionally. I know she's only 11...but i've tried this with my dd when she gets all worked up about things, and it did help her to get things into perspective.

no experience myself sorry but maybe she is extra sensitive and teary because she is tired from all the celebrations and excitment, my 4 year old is a sensitive fella and has been having alot of tears the last few days cos he tired

sorry - no advice but lurking with interest. My ds (nearly 6) cries and stresses about everything. Took him to see madagascar 2 today - he said it was sad and scary
He cries at the thought of growing up, santa coming down the chimney, and dont even go there with roald dahl books.

im becoming more worried by the day, but not sure how to handle it either...

Thanks . Writing it down is a good idea, I got her a book about how to cope if you are anxious and it said to talk about for 15 minutes and then put it all back into a box until the next day. Being a Very Bad Mummy we haven't did this beause she was fine for a while. She inadvertingly saw the beginning off the news while I was upstairs, and i think she may have saw about the Middle East crisis before switching over. She has said she is worried about dying or getting seriously hurt

She has a condition called NF1 which affects the nerve endings, one of the traits is overly emotional and she is hormonal!

Thanks for replying I just wanted to get it off my chest .

dirtygertie you have my sympathies (cool name btw)

My DD has craniel oestopathy for her physical problems arising from her NF. Last time I was there I mentioned I needed the appointment because she was sitting her 11+ the next day. The lady she ses does a variety of alternative stuff and she was getting DD to say "I'm confident, I'm not scared of the exam" while putting pressure on points(?).

We were expecting DD to sob for a few hours that night and - nothing . She didn't even mention it the next day. For anyone who knew her this really was remarkable.

I mentioned it in work as I thought it might be CBT and my friend said she's friends with 2 therapists who pratise CBT just for children. If she is unable to cope with the pressure on her own I would consider taking her for more. I had been thinking a few days before she had it that she would probably need some sort of theraphy when she's older.

hmm. interesting about the cranial osteopathy.

my ds also suffers from low self esteem. do you notice this with your dd? he has started saying recently 'im stupid and ugly and no good at anything'

he's adamant that nothing is happening at school and i think we are loving, encouraging parents so not sure where it's all coming from.

I know what you mean about not wanting to indulge it. He's sooo emotional i sometimes think he's being manipulative and of course it upsets me so i tend to get a bit cross which doesnt help either. Have tried to google a parenting book which might help but havent come up with anything.

people keep saying he'll grow out of it - im really not sure he will though..

SHe has periods of low self esteem, she has a nice wee group of friends in school, after being horrendously bullied by her BEST FRIENDS. She shows Aspergers traits which her NF nurse is looking into. There is only starting to be studies in older children with NF now, it was always more concentrated on the younger ones.

Gertie I give my DD's a high dose of fish oil everyday, I haven't given it for a couple of weeks as I ran out and I have to say I think this contributes to her behaviour. Maybe your DS would benefit from it?

My dd1 is 8, and has been having terrible problems recently. She's having a rough time at school, and really suffered badly from anxiety - at one point verging towards OCD. We were recommended this book [http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/WEBSITE/WWW/WEBPAGES/showbook.php?id=1591473144 what to do when you worry too much]]. It's written by a child psychologist, and it's almost like a work book - they write on pages throughout it. It tells them that it's normal to worry about things, but not normal to worry too much, and shows a number of methods to help them stop worrying. It's helped dd1 - might be worth a try for the sake of £8.

I'll try the link again : [http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/WEBSITE/WWW/WEBPAGES/showbook.php?id=1591473144 book]]

OK, I can usually do it...

[http://www.bookdepository.co.uk/WEBSITE/WWW/WEBPAGES/showbook.php?id=1591473144]]

Ah, look, I'm missing a bracket

abracadabra

That's the book we got, it came just before Christmas so I haven't looked at it with her I read it myself and she has read it a few times. Oh DH has just told me they had a look at it when she went to bed.

thanks for the link jh - looks like a good book. Will look into it some more. Glad its working for your dd.

coco - i hadnt heard about fish oil helping with anxiety. thats interesting to know. Will definately give it a try.

I havent heard of NF1 before. Can you tell me more about it?

It's a geneticc condition with seemly hundreds of symptons. DD doesn't have any learning problems whih is common, she's actually quite bright.

It causes benign tumours all over the body and face, we're hoping she doesn't get too many (my DH is covered). So far it looks like she is getting a cluster around the breast area .

She has dyspraxia and speech problems, that's why she goes to the oestopath. Her togune is too tight at the point of where it joins the throat. The craniel manipulation helps free it up as it puckers her face on one side.

She has had a lot to cope with, My Mum has always said she's exhausted with just trying to keep up with other children.

She has obsessions, she knows everyhing about Harry Potter and Dr Who at the moment .

wow, that seems like a lot for a kid to deal with (and you of course) no wonder she's tired and emotional. Your DH must have lots of practical advice and experience though. How is he at dealing with the emotional out bursts?

I find my DH doesnt handle it well at all (being a typical alpha male 'whatchoo crying for? type)

He's a bit better because he doesn't see her during the day iyswim? I'm shirty as I have PMT .

Hope the fish oils work out for you

iswym

will let you know how we get on with the fish oils. buying some tomorrow.

sorry i couldnt give you any helpful advice but i understand how draining and stressful an anxious child can be. Good luck with everything

Thanks, you all helped. You too Dirty