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Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

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Original poster

At what age do you think its reasonable to teach a child to use a kettle?

80 replies

GrimmaTheNome · 22/12/2008 21:57

Simple enough question... DH and I seem to have significantly different opinions.

DD is nearly 10, and, having seen younger friends making tea, asked if she could. It seemed reasonable enough to me so I was supervising when DH came in and had a fit. He's just brought it up again - made me swear she won't be doing it again. There's no point arguing when he goes off in HSE mode. But at some point DD will have to master this simple skill.

Obviously it depends on both the size of the child and the kettle, but what would you say are (a) the youngest you'd contemplate your child making tea, and (b) the upper age by which they definitely ought to be able to do this.

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

TheInvisibleManDidItWithSanta · 23/12/2008 18:49

Ds's, 6 & 8, help with cooking, and all other household chores, but I've never let them near the kettle.

When I was young my older sister got very badly burnt by boiling water. She was standing on a small wooden stool so she was high enough to pour water from the kettle, the stool leg broke and the boiling water went over her upper arm. Our mother heard her screaming, rushed in and pulled off my sisters top, but my sisters jumper (god knows what it was made of) had half melted onto her skin, so when mum pulled off her jumper you can imagine what happened.

She still has a large raised pink scar all down the upper half of one arm.

I'm all for my boys growing up independant and able to take care of themselves, but will wait till they're older and a bit bigger before letting them near the kettle.

Original poster

GrimmaTheNome · 23/12/2008 19:25

Thanks for the many and varied responses. Its really just the boiling water thing DH is adamant about, I guess he's read one too many stories like Invisibles unfortunate sister. I know now that I am right but since accidents do happen I'll go along and play safe for a while yet. And maybe cause my heavy kettle to break and get a lighter replacement...

She's getting a chemistry set for xmas!

OP posts:

Podrick · 23/12/2008 19:40

I too have seen kids with hige scars on their chests from boiling water accidents.

My dd is 9.

She doesn't drink tea. She can't easily reach everything in the kitchen and can't carry a full kettle. I am all for teaching independence but see no point in teaching her to use a kettle at this point just so that she can make tea for me!

pamelat · 23/12/2008 20:05

10 or 11?

lindenlass · 23/12/2008 20:14

Can I just ask those of you who are too nervous of boiling water accidents if you let your DCs travel in your car? Or walk along hte road? You know how risky that is?

Risk is a part of life, and it's really important that children grow up knowing how to assess it and take risks appropriately.

IME children don't do things they don't feel comfortable with unless they're pushed - they have a very good inbuilt risk-sensor.

My DD1 made tea (not pouring) when she was 3 once - she's now 5.5 and, until this thread came up, hasn't done it again, but will be asking her in the morning if she wants to learn! Had forgotten about htings like that. Her and her 3yo sister do supervised chopping with knives and cooking at the cooker though (gas hob). Too small to use the oven though as can't reach to get things in and out safely unfortunately. I'd say if the OP's DD seems secure with the kettle, then she probably is, and to let her get on with it. Of course, your heart will probalby be in your mouth until you get used to it...just like it will have been while you got used to her climbing ridiculously high climbing frames as atoddler ;-)

Iwanttobeamillionaire · 23/12/2008 20:30

My DS is nearly 8 and makes a lovely cup of tea! He can also make enchilades with supervision (I am only allowed to watch and help with putting them in the oven). He is very sensible and loves to be in the kitchen so I suppose it depends on their capibility, there is no way I would my DD the kitchen, like Taz in a tornado!

cranberryjuice · 24/12/2008 18:34

why do these discussions end up like competitions

needmorecoffee · 24/12/2008 18:38

7 or 8. They also learnt to chop wood with an axe and light the fires about 7 or 8 too.
If anyone is likely to drop the kettle its me!
I wouldn't let a small child who has to stand on something use a kettle though.
Mine were tall enough at 7 to do so.

squaddiewife · 15/04/2011 16:39

DD8 makes me a coffee, taught her only to fill the kettle as full as it needs to be and it's a lovely cuppa too!

nickelbaalamb · 15/04/2011 16:40

I would say 7 or 8 - remember when you were a Brownie, you had to make a cup of tea in the Hostess badge, which you could do in your first year.

nickelbaalamb · 15/04/2011 16:41

exactly, linden - and the child is much less likely to have an accident if they have been taught to do it properly.

IAmTheCookieMonster · 15/04/2011 16:49

I think you need to sit down with your DH and discuss boundaries for now and the future as it sounds like he is a bit overprotective you have different ideas about it

brimfull · 15/04/2011 16:53

sod the kettle
I teach my kids to open a bottle of wine.

takeonboard · 15/04/2011 17:36

my DS is 9 and has started making tea in the last few months. Sometimes 9when he really wants something) he brings us tea in bed on a weekend ...bliss, wish i had taught him sooner

AngelDog · 15/04/2011 23:08

In Raising Boys, Steve Biddulph recommends not letting boys deal with boiling water before 10 as they apparently lag behind girls in motor skills (or something).

I don't know when I used a kettle, but I was doing most of the family ironing (for pocket money!) from the age of 10, so I'd be comfortable with it in theory.

missnevermind · 15/04/2011 23:37

Brimfull - 2YO DS will fetch a can of beer unasked - and keep on bringing them untill the box is empty

monkeyjamtart · 16/04/2011 01:03

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

jade80 · 16/04/2011 01:08

Supervised heavily I would teach them how to use it at say five. Unsupervised/less supervised maybe around 8 depending on the child.

HowsTheSerenity · 16/04/2011 02:36

Seven if it is an electric kettle and 9 if it is a kettle on a stove.
If you educated your children then they should be fine.

I showed the dc's pictures of what horrible burns look like.

lljkk · 16/04/2011 06:08

Well, that's confidence building Serenity... not.
OLD THREAD ALERT.
Twigged from Coldtits different spelling... :)

AngelDog · 16/04/2011 13:54

Oops. Maybe the OP should update us as to whether her DD is allowed now at 13.

HowsTheSerenity · 17/04/2011 11:32

lljkk - why is it not confidence building. The kids like wierd stuff like that. No lies in that house.

sockmonkeymassive · 18/04/2011 22:19

I made my mother tea often when I was 9. One accident was I spilt the freshly boiled water down my chest. My second accident I scolded the skin off my whole thumb and spent a long time with my thumb in the freezer with the skin peeling. I'm 40 but I still remember the pain of both accidents.

Northumberlandlass · 19/04/2011 13:17

DS is 7.5 - he makes DH coffee quite regularly, he also makes his own toast.

(should add he is quite tall, there is no stretching for the kettle etc - in case I sound like a bad mother)

He doesn't make me coffee, because he puts in 2 teaspoons coffee / 2 teaspoons sugar & drop of milk....blurgh.

Brocka1975 · 30/10/2014 08:36

I aim to start my son young, but I am disabled and strongly aware that my son will have a few more responsibilities than his friends will. At the moment he is only 2 and due to my disability I sleep in the living room at night, my son already wakes himself up, is potty trained and comes through from his room, turns the tv on, then goes in the kitchen and goes in "his" cupboard, and helps himself to fruit, cereal bars and cartons of juice, for his breakfast, he also often brings me some through, he is already sensible and only takes what he can eat and doesn't over indulge. He seems to already know that mummy cant move much on a morning and opens the curtains and other small but safe jobs, before his dad wakes up. I have thought about this kind of subject for a long time and even discussed it with social services and my OT, because I know sooner or later he will need to learn skills like this. Mt OT suggested to start off with when I do want to introduce boiling the kettle, we are thinking at the age of 6-7 we should use a travel kettle especially for him and teach him to only fill it high enough for what he is making. He already collects up dirty washing, pits things in the bin, rakes leaves, sweeps up, answers the door (with a chain on), and waters plants etc. when I was a child I was looking after brothers and my dad at the age of 5, making meals, I know it seems harder in this day and age, but I think all children should learnt o be independent. Sometimes I sit hear worrying that he will grow up too fast, but I don't think it will harm him.

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