6yo DS1 has an answer for EVERYTHING won't do anything he's told!

[carocaro]

Anyone have one of these? Am exhausted with all the bru-haa-haa of everyday-ness. We've just had a big row because he won't write a letter to Santa, her can write, he just being stubborn. We are supposed to be going to see Madagascar 2 on Sunday, but why should I take him when he's a pain in the ass. Me and DH have had enough of him, it's just so exhausting, have DS2 aged 21 months and he's physcically exhausting, it's cold and wet, going nowhere near shops. Peed off. Just want to be eating crisps with a many G&T's in front of X-Factor and Striclty in peace!

Is that book Talk So Your Kids Will Listen any good?

Don't bother writing the letter.

Ignore the back chat.

I have a 7 year old like it and have been really struggling. I try and ignore the bad stuff and really praise the good. Another example is - Short tell off for child who hit and lots of attention to the victim. Works. Just hard to keep up with. Worth it if you can though.

why set yourself up like this?

ignore, send to room etc. and suggest " do you want to"if he says no - sit back with a crisp butty and a brew and leave him to it.

pick your battles

send him to his room when he's pissing you off

ignore him when he's being a smart-arse

and stop letting him win

Dd was like this. I got through it by picking my battles and being very firm with the ones that mattered and letting the rest go. Writing to Santa doesn't seem to me like one of those battles that have to be won.

You don't want to paint yourself into a corner where battles are fought not because they are important but because you need to win.

If you do start an argument, it's got to be worth making sure that you do get your way.

Doling out punishment (no cinema) for being generally obnoxious is bad psychology; punishment should be for one individual offence (and it would have to be a big one to cancel a day out)- otherwise he will start thinking of himself as a naughty unpleasant boy. And then any incentive to behave will be gone: if I'm a bad boy I might as well behave like a bad boy.

My 6yr old DS2 is like this......

He is either ignored (nt always possible when his elder siblings constantly answer him back tho), or is counted to three and put on the stairs/in his room, and is to stay there until he comes and says sorry (which he normally does in seconds, and then carries on, and so a pattern emerges for a while).

it is normal (IMHO), part of a stage they go thru, and depending on how you deal with it it is a short-lived stage or something that makes you tear your hair out by the time they are 8!

you need to work out a strategy to deal with him, and stick to it. Good luck, not easy......I am getting less hair by the day!

My almost 6 year old DS alternates between lovely and the spawn of Satan at the moment. I really don't think he can help himself and at the weekends is particularly bad in wanting to extert his influence over everything.

Agree I would not worry about the letter to santa. It is supposed to be fun so if he does not want to then why make it into a row.

Have read how to talk so kids will listen and it all makes good sense but I have trouble keeping my cool enough to carry it out.