Parents of bad sleepers please give me hope

[Travellerintime]

Ds is a terrible sleeper. He's now 11 months, and it's not unknown for him to be awake for an hour, an hour and a half during the night, moaning on, unable to get back to sleep. Most nights he ends up in bed with us, and then he keeps me awake as he insists on sleeping jammed up next to me.

He actually doesn't seem to need that much sleep, as even after a bad night, I'm much more tired than he is. He's quite a cheerful chap by day. I even feel I have to watch his naps - it seems ANY naps after 3pm affect his ability to go to sleep at 7. Today he just had 40 mins in the morning, and 20 mins at 3pm, and still didn't seem tired at 7pm.

Anyway, I'm not really looking for solutions, because I'm beginning to accept that maybe he's just this way... (comparing with dd who was/still is such a great sleeper, and we've tried to do the same with both), but I would like anyone whose been through the bad sleeping to tell me, when does it start to get better? When do dc who are bad sleepers get it, so to speak?

I didn't want to leave you unanswered, but fear that my experience will dishearten rather than reassure you:

ds1 fab sleeper from 7 months. Sleeps through fireworks, smoke alarm, noisy brothers.

ds2 sleeper from hell as a baby - numerous wakings, took ages to settle again, didn't nap properly during day etc etc - finally started sleeping better at 2.5 (by which I mean only one or two wakings rather than several) and now (aged nearly 4) sleeps all night more often than not.

and ds3 is 14 months old and has never ever slept through the night.

We tried everything with ds2 and nothing made any difference. He just suddenly started sleeping better - almost as if he grew into it. So I don't feel confident that anything I do will make ds3 a better sleeper - I am just waiting it out (and hoping it doesn't take him as long as it did ds2)

traveller, with my dd, it suddenly clicked at 17 months when I weaned her off the breast during a nursing strike. She went from waking up to 6x per night to sleeping through within a matter of weeks. Now at 5 she sleeps through almost every everything, including her little brother's (2.2 years) crying, who seems to have stolen her mantle of bad sleeper. No sign of clicking from ds yet, but then again, he won't give up the boob. I suspect it will be more gradual with ds ...

My dd woke up 3 to 6 times a night until she was 2.5yrs old. Crying and moaning and would end up in bed with us.

My ds1 and ds2 were both 18 months when they started sleeping through. They would also wake up 2 or 3 times a night.

Fast forward a few years and dd and ds2 sleep 8pm to 8am or later if a weekend and ds1 sleeps from 7:30pm to 6 am.

I haven't got up to them for years except for when they are sick. They never come into our bed through the night.

Even though those first few years were very difficult, especially when I had dd and ds1 both waking up, but they are now good sleepers.

There is hope!!

Both my 2 have been had sleepers. DS1, now 3, is a brilliant sleeper now and things improved signigicantly at about 2, though were a lot better from 18 months on. Similar to yours, he often ended up in bed with us.

DS2 is now 14 months and though better than he was a few months ago, is still a regular waker. I'm hoping that things will improve similar to his brother.

I totally sympathise with anyone's sleep problems. It's such hard work! As DS1 is such a good sleeper now, I like to think we got the hard stuff out of the way when he was young- not that it works like that.

More hope here too.

DD 11 months sleeps 9-10 hours per night since about a month ago, so a tad more hope too.

Thanks for your messages.

It is somehow reassuring to hear that others have been there and survived, even if it does go on for a while longer (which I am sure it will, it will..)

Does anyone think that bad sleepers tend to need less sleep? This certainly seems to fit ds.

I'm glad we had a good sleeper first, because if not I'm not sure I could have had another baby (although funnily enough I thought dd had been a bad sleeper as a baby until ds came along