Poo regression: stick, carrot, lactulose or gin?

[SlubberOverTheYardArm]

dd2 (3.5) has been potty trained for a year. She was dry and clean day and night after a week with the occasional 'not getting to the loo in time' accidents.

For the past couple of months there has been an increased frequency of poo in pants events. For the past 2+ weeks she has done every single poo in her pants.

She is seemingly unconcerned about the whole thing, frequently I will sniff them out, and going on the flattened state of the turds she has been sat on them for quite some time.

They are giant man turds, but of a soft smooth texture, not hard and bobbly .

Initially I was breesy "where do we do our poo?"
More poo
[new track]
Then I was cross "why is there a poo in your pants?"
More poo
[new track]
Then I put her in her bedroom
More poo
[new track]
Then I printed and coloured in a fairy princess castle with movable fairy to go up the 10 steps of turdy success to gain a playmobil pony
More poo

so now I am turning to mn and gin

I know I have been a giant twunt by trying loads of techniques, she is probably confused.

Today I lost it and said "right if you are going to keep pooing in your pants I am going to put you back into nappies" and manhandled her into a pull up. She was distraught. Not my finest hour as a mother

What do I do now?

gawd I do go on don't I?

Maybe just be super breesy for a few days, then start again?

oh yes and it's tack not track slubber you fool

Firstly - the poos don't sound like she is constipated and am I right in thinking she hasn't increased the number of poos in a day?

Is there a particular time of day she poos or is it random?

If particular time of day then I would sit her on the toilet at that time of day, read a book or something until she has been.

If random then I would make her go to the toilet every 30mins or so until she is regularly doing them in toilet without prompting.

Does she have a problem doing poos on the toilet? Or is it that she gets ingrossed in what she is doing and doesn't notice.

I would give her a reward for every poo done on the toilet, but I think when they are preschool age it needs to be a reward given there and then as they don't get the promise of a reward in the future quite so well. What ever you want - doesn't have to be big - a sticker, a couple of chocolate buttons, erm something she likes doing for 30 mins (extra telly/activity with you).

It does make you want to scream though and I do sympathise.

Thank you Armadillo.

I'm sure she is not constipated, but the size of them sometimes , DH would be secretly impressed with some of her efforts

Just the one poo a day, but can happen at any time.

She is fine going to the loo for wees, so I have no idea why all this is happening

I can try with the sitting on the loo every 30mins but she is a child who if she doesn't want to do something...

OK will remove fairy castle and return to buttons and stickers

I can sympathise, my 3 year old would've stayed in nappies until he was 6 I think. I took him out of nappies in march when he was 2.5, but only because DS2 was on the way. He did have bladder control, but wasn't interested in using the loo.

We've had our ups and downs, but the last week or so has gone backwards. We've had wee and poos in pants every day, and similar to your little one, not worried about it.

The wees I think are because he's a busy boy, but the poos, he doen't want to go to the loo. He manages to squeeze it back up (soryy TMI) and can do that for a whole day. He's always been Mr unregular going 2-3 days without a poo. But I don't think he's particularly constipated as such.

Have to confess by bad mothering. I held him on the loo yesterday cos he really needed to go. I think there are more things in life for a boy to be doing.... Must try stickers again.

Good luck!

the every 30 mins thing prob is a bit extreme

I make ds go before starting every new activity. I also, once he is getting better at it, drop the treats down to making it to lunchtime with clean/dry pants, then to end of day and gradually move them further and further apart.

I also make him take wet/dirty clothes off himself and get clean ones. Though that does lead to a half naked child running round the house shaking his bum at people yelling 'nakey bum, nakey bum' (ok is very funny). but it's more of an effort than just going to the toilet.

slubber - sorry noone saw your post earlier!

Can't really add anything, ds was trained at 2.4 daytime, and has been perfect since. However now at 4.7 he's still not nighttrained, as he's a heavy wee-er, sleeper and still poos most nights. Argh.

DD has just started training herself and is so damned stroppy and domineering over the whole thing 'today i wee potty' 'today I wee toilet' and repeatedly poos on the floor at CMs house as can't be arsed to get up when playing. Doesn't do it anywhere else. I'll be back to this thread in just under a year and a half.

slubber - sorry noone saw your post earlier!

Can't really add anything, ds was trained at 2.4 daytime, and has been perfect since. However now at 4.7 he's still not nighttrained, as he's a heavy wee-er, sleeper and still poos most nights. Argh.

DD has just started training herself and is so damned stroppy and domineering over the whole thing 'today i wee potty' 'today I wee toilet' and repeatedly poos on the floor at CMs house as can't be arsed to get up when playing. Doesn't do it anywhere else. I'll be back to this thread in just under a year and a half.

Enormously humungous turds can (believe it or not) be a sign of previous constipation, even if they are soft. That's because if a child doesn't poo (for whatever reason) the rectum stretches, it takes more poo to trigger the stretch receptors that make them need to poo, then when they do go the poos are enormous because of the large rectum.

Has she been constipated? Was she scared to poo or holding it in because she was too busy?

We don't recommend reminding toileting for poos more than every 2 hours (assuming there is no wetting) as overencouragement can cause refusal to go to the loo.

Can you get her to sit on the loo regularly? Will she stay there a while, reading/watching TV/singing etc?

See this is why I love mn, because at home on your own with 2 dc and another crappy pair of pants you start freaking out a bit thinking 'oh god, I have totally fucked this all up. She is going to be sitting on a giant poo in her pants half way through her further maths A-level'

And then you come here and realise lots of other people are going through it.

It is such a difficult age, trying to persuade her to sit on the loo when she wants to do anything but sit on the loo, well, I'd have better luck getting Kofi Annan into Zimbabwe.

At least you have kept your sense of humour

A musical potty?

Sit her on the potty whilst you sit on the loo and see who can poo first? (You would need to be incredibly dedicated to the cause for this one)

Sidge, I don't recall her ever being seriously constipated. She is a bit of a fruit addict. The giant poos do make me wonder if there is a scenario as you describe (I have followed other poo incontinence threads) which is why I wondered about the lactulose.

Should I just push fluids?

We have a large selection of potties, maybe I should bring them all out again and put one in the rooms she plays in.

LOL & first past the post poo competitions.

Actually I am trying to remember the last time I had a quiet personal private crap, usually I am joined by one or both DC, and sometimes DH too, all clamouring for my attention. I need to get a lock.

Will try pooing in unison though. Will try ANYTHING atm.

If her poos are soft then lactulose won't help, as all that does is draw water back into the bowel and soften poo.

I think maybe a combination of fluids, regular toileting (for poos), reward and possibly distraction might do it. Depends on your DD, some children respond really well to competition or rewards, others just don't care.

And as for pooing in private - wassat then? I have vague memories of going to the loo alone aeons ago...

Califrau, has the movicol helped?

Is the poo size the cause of all this and not because she is being a bloody minded 3yo?

What are you doing with your ds's diet?

Oh you sound like you are having a hard time. God this bloody parenting lark...just when you think "YES YES OH THANK YOU GOD, I HAVE CRACKED IT"... it's shitty pants time.

So the Dr said to push fruit and veg..hmm, maybe I should remove dd's daily banana and put prunes in instead.

Oh about poo size. I have been a Not Very Nice Mummy the last few days. Poor dd. Maybe it's not her fault at all.

shit

yes, I know they have binding effect, but she is a creature of habit and likes one for lunch.

Right, no more nanas. She is a fruit fan so I can swap those for something else.

also, on a completely irreverant and childish tangent I am finding your post

we were warned against bananas

very entertaining
[childish]