Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

Flip

1 2

Original poster

Does your 3yr old drive you to distraction?

43 replies

Belgianchox · 14/11/2008 07:31

Because mine does on a regular basis, and much as I adore her, this morning I just lost it with her, screeched at her that she was driving me insane and would she please please just put her shoes on and let me do her hair sob. I feel like i'm going slightly mad, really, I would never lay a finger on her, but god does she infuriate me. I know it's not good to let a 3yr old to have the upper hand, but I really feel like she's pushing my buttons on purpose, and everyday almost it's the same. I'm 16wks pregnant with Nbr3, which I suppose doesn't help. I don't want to carry on like this....I feel like crap, and I'l sure DD does too, she's a sensitive little thing, and it really gets to her when we row.
How do you keep a lid on things when you're kids are getting on top of you?

OP posts:

Are your children’s vaccines up to date?

Set a reminder

mathsmummy27 · 17/11/2008 14:37

oooh so nice to know I'm not alone!

Luckily, one thing that usually works with my DD is tickling and rough and tumble. But usually when I'm least in the mood for it (and pregnant with no. 2!).

We have a 'naughty area' where she goes for three mins, but what on earth do you do when out? bribe i guess

nowwearefour · 17/11/2008 14:55

bribery and punishments. works all the way. well actually it doesnt work all that well. but better than not doing it at all!!!

dandycandyjellybean · 17/11/2008 14:55

Can I add my threenager ds? Overnight we had dramatic arm folding accompanied by a very sarcastic 'FINE'! And also supernanny has come back to bite me in the bum, as if I am trying to get him to do something he doesn't want to do (often when out or in company) he will sit down with his arms crossed and say 'this is all VERY inrespectable mummy'! AAARRRRGGGHHHH

lizandlulu · 17/11/2008 15:18

i have just read this thread and it is my dd all over!
her hair is like a birds nest and its not even that curly!
i do bribe her with chocolate and she has absoloutly no understanding of tidying away and alot of the time i feel liek i am a bad mother, but she is happy, just untidy and unruly.

DesperateHousewifeToo · 17/11/2008 18:55

wrt bird's nest hair.

Since I started putting loads of conditioner on dd's hair when washed and using a de-tangling spray, brushing is much easier (and less painful for her!).

Brushing everyday rather than the once a week I used to do does too

Re: threats for good behaviour. We have ''x will go in the cupboard''. 'X' could be anything from her scooter to toys that she will not tidy away (preferrably favourite ones). They stay in there for 24hours. No cbeebies the next day has also worked.

Dd also threatens her older db that she will put his toys in 'the cupboard' if he does not do as I ask

chipmunkswhereareyou · 17/11/2008 22:25

Star charts....definitely helps with my ds's behaviour - not saying he's strop free but I'm sure less than he otherwise would be.

MrsFreedy · 18/11/2008 13:15

Anyone elses DD copies what they say? I find it really infuriating especially when I am trying to deal with DS.

Supernanny does not work in our house either!!

I have to admit that If all else fails when dealing with DD I just ignore her. I say to her that if she is going to behave like that I will not speak to her and walk away - she soon comes around.

lizandlulu · 18/11/2008 21:03

my dd doesnt copy what i say but will repeat herself
what winds me up most is her clingyness and her tone of voice when she is beoing clingy. she can be sat on my knee which my arms wrapped around her and her head on my chest and she will whine 'mummy come here' im like 'how much closer do you want me to be?'

Anifrangapani · 18/11/2008 21:07

Ds has been to walk to playgroup in bare feet.

When it all gets too much.... gin has great medicinal uses.

pluckyducky · 18/11/2008 21:13

How lovely to read these posts and realise that my ds is completely normal! He turns 3 in a couple of weeks and is currently driving me insane with constant whinges. He wants to do EVERYTHING. So I get the butter out of the fridge to put on the toast in the morning. Cue ds throwing himself on the floor in a strop whinging "I wanted to get the butter mummy", so I put it back and ask him to get it for me...sometimes that works, sometimes he stays on the floor screaming "I wanted to get it before!!". And so the day goes on like that.

I've also got a 3 month old dd and I just don't have the time, the patience or the inclination to pander to these whims and often find myself shouting more often that I ought to. I feel guilty immediately and we have a cuddle and I always apologise for shouting and try to explain why I was shouting.

By jove, they're exhausting aren't they?!

DonutMum · 19/11/2008 05:54

Hi All,came on to start a post about pain the arse 3.8 year old that I'm at the end of tether with. He wanted his sleeves rolled up on his pyjameas this morning. They were too tight, so he had a tantrum. I took his pyjama top off, he had a worse tantrum. I shouted. Loud. And demanded DH come and deal with him , storming off. This is after last night's performance where he kicked me, slapped me in the face and spat at me (intersting as I can count the number of times I have smacked him on one hand although I would like it to be zero). All because he went into time out for having a tantrum about the television. He's now at kindergarten where the teacher will undoubtedly have a hard day and I'll have to go see her tomorrow for his bad behaviour (already arranged as this has been going on for weeks). I actually think he's a bit demented sometimes. Will have to resort to hard drugs (for me, that is)

shoptilidrop · 19/11/2008 08:30

wow, i could have written this yesterday.
My DD is 3 in jan - and yesterday her behaviour was totally appalling. i have NEVER seen her behave so badly. DH was a star and took over when he came home from work and i was so worked up i couldnt be in the same room as her. Nothing i did seemed to make any difference - pasta jar - naughtly step- up in her room - me shouting. She tantrumed and screamed for about 4 hours, everthing was wrong, from the cushions in the lounge, to what we had for tea. ANd we had children round to play in the afternoon and she BIT them- she has never done this before, i thought she was past all that.
Its reassuring to know that most 3 year olds are horrible sometimes. Today is a new day - we have a new strategy and a bit of hope it might work.

WowOoo · 19/11/2008 08:38

Spent a weekend with my son 2.7 and friend's 3.4 yr old. (she and dh away) The pair of them were conspiring to wind me up as much as poss, I'm sure.

I know it's just what they do. All I could do was think of the time when they would be in bed and I could SCREAM. Not both mine though so I really do sympathise.

chipmunkswhereareyou · 19/11/2008 10:58

Did I really say that on Monday - so recently!? Ds was definitely not motivated to behave well by that star chart yesterday or this morning....argh!!!

One thing he's doing that's really annoying is saying he's hungry ALL the time, even five mins after eating and sometimes even though he must be full. And then sometimes he doesn't eat all his food and then five mins later after leaving the table says he's hungry.

Honestly I want to ban the phrase 'I'm hungry' (and I'm thirsty too as he's doing the same with that). It's so stupid! I wouldn't mind if he really was hungry but he just can't be.

Any ideas? I presume it's some sort of attention seeking, wind mummy up game. Oh joy!

milkysallgone · 19/11/2008 11:25

This is such a great thread. I think 3 yr olds are designed to make you dislike them so that letting our 'babies' go off into the big bad world (school etc) is so much easier . Same goes for teenagers re: leaving home.

dairymilkdunker · 19/11/2008 13:08

Arrgghh. I know the feeling all too well. My DD has just turned three and just seems to go on and on and on. And on some more.
She currently appears to be practising the concept of opposites. Yes. No. Yes. No. No. Yes. Yes. No. Its like a new hobby. And best of all - joy of joys - her 2yo brother is her training buddy, so whilst i try not to indulge the situation, she has a more than willing accomplice in DS. They can spend all day bickering and it drives me insane.

Oh i've tried all sorts with varying degrees of success (or not). Unfortunately the one thing which always works is the chocolate funny that. Today will be a challenge - our bribe stores are completely empty so might have to get creative if we're all going to survive the day in one piece

She's at this moment sat on the floor proclaiming "But I'm soooo upset!" For no reason, good or otherwise.

She's also a nightmare when it comes to hairbrushing and as a result resembles a scarecrow most days. Seriously considering having it all lopped off because its just not worth the tears and aggrivation. Loads of conditioner and de-tangling spray does help and we got one of thise TangleTeezer brushes, which again does help. But she still gets hysterical about all things hair related. I think its almost become a habit for her. It doesnt help that she wont let me put it up for her or clip it back so it ends up full of food and other assorted gunk so the cycle continues.

And i cant even begin to talk about toe-nail cutting sigh

Its all sooo much fun

Original poster

Belgianchox · 23/11/2008 22:44

I'm glad I'm not the only one that resorts to bribery! But it's so wearing, wouldn't it be nice if they just did as they were asked, some of the time, i'm not looking for miracles..... Although today we had another threenager round, and I actually thought mine was quite nice in comparison, sometimes it helps to get some perspective
A note on hairbrushing - mine has taken to doing it herself now........ it's quieter, but not necessarily neater!

OP posts:

queenrollo · 24/11/2008 08:39

i didn't see this thread yesterday when i posted about my '3 year old teenager'......ds was just a horror yesterday.

bribery sometimes works, sometimes not. he is big for his age and physically quite strong so for example getting him upstairs at bedtime if he doesn't want to go is very challenging indeed.....

Flip

1 2