How little food can a 4 year old survive on?

[lavenderbongo]

My dd1 is driving me round the bend. She is refusing to eat her lunch and dinner. I am not sure what she is surviving on at the moment.

This is what she has eaten today.

Breakfast.

Few tablespoons of crunchy mueslie cereal with milk.
Half a slice of toast and marmite.

Mid Morning - soup at school - not sure how much she ate.

Lunch

Two slices of cucumber.
(refused to eat tuna sandwhiches)

Mid Afternoon - small cup of chopped fresh fruit.

Dinner

Nothing - refused to even try pasta.

Can she survive on this? I am really worried and trying not to make a big deal of it as I think she knows that this is a good way to get attention. I am reluctant to make her stay at the table until she has eaten but I am reaching the end of my tether.
At the moment we just dont allow her anything else unless she has eaten her "main course". So no cakes biscuits etc...Surprisingly she eats these no problem.

Anybody have any advice?

the equivilant of a boiled egg.

Will post more later once have got ds in bed (sorry wanted it to show up on threads im on)

am in the same position here.

dd1 has just turned into food refuser (has always eaton lots of everyhting)

have to go to cook tea now (ha! like it'll get eaten!) but can come back and share what her behaviour consultant said later (she is ASD, that's why the consultant)

Sorry no advice but wanted to show support. Our DS eats less than a bird - he's 2 and 1/2 but apparently he eats fine at nursery?!

He's never had a massive appetite [always choosing drink over food] but he used to eat at least something. He picks a lot and we always joke that he's too busy to eat. He might eat a decent amount once every few days other than that it might be a mouthful of something or an apple or a yoghurt. I do worry about it tho but he's very active and seems healthy enough

Give nutritious biscuits and cakes - the latest advice for feeding problems in children is to get them to eat something and not to distinguish between good/bad foods. Also give them what they will eat with a new food. Is there anything she really likes - my DD lived off pasta and pesto for a few weeks and no serious harm its better than going to bed with no dinner.

My DD has been a food refuser since I weaned her so I've had a bit of experience now.

How long has your dd been eating like this?

You have my sympathy. Ds has been a terrible eater since he was 18 months old (he changed literally overnight). He's now 4.8 and has got better over the last 5-6 months (and more noticeably since he started full-time at Reception last month)

Although he still has days where he's eaten half a piece of toast, a bit of carrot and that's all

what does she weigh. The docs only got fretty when dd (4) weight dropped to 20 pounds (bout 10kg)

Thanks for all your advice - good to know I am not the only one in this position.

Mercy - She has been eating on and off like this for about the last year and a half. She can eat fine for several weeks and then she starts this again.

needmorecoffee - She has been weighed and measured at school and they said she is fine and a healthy weight but I am not sure how she has managed this.

my number 2 ate like a sparrow and he's now a 6 foot teenager with muscles. No idea how he did it either!
Number 4 eats very little. 2 teaspoons porridge for breakfast. Half a banana. 3 teaspoons soup for lunch, maybe a few teaspoons squash and butter for tea. Half a cup of formula milk.
She's getting a feeding tube cos of it.

My DS is 10 and still eats like a bird. Had mentioned it to HV who's advice was just to keep feeding him breakfast/lunch/dinner (no specially prepared meals) with no sweets unless he finished.

"He will not let himself starve and his height and weight are in proportion so nothing to worry about - he is just being picky and will grow out of it" - her words not mine.

My 4yo DS2 is very picky - he virtually lives on peanut butter sandwiches and fruit. (Plus chocolate when I let him). He looks ok though, & has loads of energy. They ain't gonna starve [is what I tell myself]

Generally people overestimate how much small children need to eat - also remember it's what they eat over a week, not a day that is important.

Make sure she's not filling up on squash or milk (both are filling) and just offer food when you can; some children prefer to graze or eat 5 small meals a day rather than 3. Don't worry about letting her have pudding first, some children prefer to eat their yoghurt or fruit before their main. (My 2 year old likes to dip her veg into her yoghurt!)

And oddly enough my dd (aged 7) eats constantly and is super skinny.

It's really, really hard to find skirts and trousers that fit her as she is very slight but with longish legs (just like her mum actually!)

I have the same problem with ds who is 3. We have lots of days where he will hardly touch a thing. I ensure I always have a cereal bar in my bag and healthy snacks available for as and when he feels the need to eat.

I've never pressured him about food. I have found latley that if he helps me make the evening meal then he is more prepared to try his dinner.

It does drain the life out of me when I prepare meals that he refuses point blank. He is in the pattern where he won't eat well for 2-3 weeks and then have a hungry spell and eat, eat, eat for a couple of days! I'm hoping it will improve over time.

my son goes for days virtually eating nothing espec when he has a cold. Today he ate a pancake for breakfast and a slice of toast for supper...he's five

Just wanted to add that my DS is exactly the same. He is 2.4 and tends to exist on fresh air most of the time - but he is a solid little man with far too much plenty of energy so I am trying not to get worried.

He goes to nursery 4 days a week and I have never asked how much he eats - but they have never said they are concerned so I kid myself that for 4 days a week, he is eating!

It seems it is quite common

Thanks everyone for your input - it really helps put things in perspective when you see other people facing similar problems.

MisterMaker - if feel just like you when i have spent hours making a home cooked healthy meal ans she refuses to even try it. And what she likes chages from day to day - AHHHH

anyway - i shall remain calm and keep plodding on with the no treats till shes eaten.