Playing up while walking

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Any ideas please. Ds will walk fine off the bus to nursery but from the minute I pick him up at night he'll run out into the road (only the quiet ones thank goodness and he does look to see if any cars are coming first), climb on every fence and gate going, tonight he started running into people's gardens and when I try to get him to hold my hand and walk properly his legs buckle under him. I've tried dragging him (literally), I've tried threatening him with getting the buggy out again saying only naughty boys and babies go in buggies and I've tried reasoning with him. He's 3.3 and I can feel my blood pressure rising. I've tried not shouting at him and asking him quietly and firmly but nothing seems to work. Trouble with getting the buggy out is that he can wriggle out of the straps and then he climbs out anyway. I thought we had finely cracked it this time as he's been good for weeks now but its just that journey home. He's been doing it for a week now and its driving me mad. I told dp that we'll have to leave him in nursery for an extra hour because I just can't face picking him up. I try not to drink in the week but its driving me to get the wine out to calm myself. He's fine as soon as he gets home.

Megg, have you actually put him in the buggy when he does this? I know you said you've threatened him, but if you actually do it, it will probably have a much stronger impact. Also what about reins..? Even if you just use them initially until you get the desired effect. My ds (2 1/2) tends to run off in shopping centres sometimes, so I either pick him up and carry him (which he doesn't like) or tell him I will put him in a shopping trolley if he doesn't stay with me. A couple of times when he has been particularly bad, I've taken him straight home and put him in his room for a time-out, until he gets the idea to listen to me. I have noticed an improvement over the last month or so, so I think it's working.

Seems we're all drinking a bit more these days! It's not just you. Best of luck..

If you want to carry out the buggy threat, and you've got reins you might be able to clip the harness for the reins directly onto the buggy harness system, which would make it harder for him to wriggle out.

My ultimate threat is to carry him home in a fireman's lift. I have only had to do this once, as he is so embarrassed that he promises to be good within a few seconds. Who needs to join a gym, when there is all this child-related weight lifting?!

Without wanting to sound too psycho-analytical, I think it sounds like there's something else going on with your DS. Could be that he is really pleased to see you but doesn't know how to show it or that he needs to let off some pent up frustration from the day or that he just needs the physical exercise?

As I say, it could be any one of a number of things but if he is generally well behaved it might be worth trying to figure it out rather than strapping him into his buggy. Although I would strap him in before leaving the nursery. I felt a bit anxious about the thought of him running into the road however quiet (my DS is not walking yet so I have those wobbly feelings about other people's children )

Above, sounds rather touchy-feely I know, but 3 year olds have lots of weird things going on that even the most vocal amongst them can't explain.

If you son a good communicator, as my DS used to run about, but he (also 3) has a good idea of what you are telling him. My sister dd is also 3 and her dd is not a good talker/communicator and I think she doesn't understand why she shouldn't do that yet. She will not understand that climbing on a fence may break it, while my DS will.

Definately do the pushchair/harness thing though.

Thanks everyone. Well I've found out that his keyworker at nursery is leaving next week and a new girl has started. I've explained to him that Claire has to move away and he seems fine with it and he says he likes Jo the new girl. All the same after the problems we had last year at his old nursery we're going in to discuss the situation with the nursery owner who is very hands-on. Tried the buggy thing but its a bit difficult as he can get out of it even when strapped in, he's a bit of a Houdini. It was fine as a novelty for him but then he wanted to be out exploring again. Last night I chickened out and got a taxi home. He's absolutely fine until he finds out there's no car waiting for us at the gate and its then that he plays up. I've gone with the he's tired thing as it seems quite plausible and he says he's tired. I've tried to explain to him that he could break people's fences or they don't want him in their gardens but when he's tired like that and being a brat its difficult to get him to listen. I'll keep working on it next week and see what happens then. Trouble is its a bit difficult carrying a kid who weighs over 3 stone and four bags, I certainly don't need to go to the gym to do weights with that lot.