Please or to access all these features

Behaviour/development

Talk to others about child development and behaviour stages here. You can find more information on our development calendar.

How can I help my dd get over a car crash?

4 replies

MissisBoot · 24/09/2008 10:43

I had an accident last week and dd was involved. She is 3 and is finding it hard to get over teh accident. Thankfully no one was hurt although her shoulder was sore where the seatbelt worked.

Last night she said that she thinks about the accident all the time and wants to speak about it a lot. I've tried explaining that it was only an accident and that lots of people have different accidents and giving her examples, but how do I help her deal with it so it doesn't play on her mind for too long? The car is still outside and is quite visibly damaged, but I'm hoping to get rid of it this week and am hoping that it will stop triggering her memories of it.

We had the accident whilst I was taking her to nursery so consequently she has been a bit quiet and tearful there. I feel like I've really let her down when I should have been protecting her

OP posts:
WowOoo · 24/09/2008 10:48

Aw, the poor thing. Would let her talk about it and try not to belittle her fears (if you see what I mean - 'it was only an accident')
I can still remember an accident from when i was 2. We learn fear and she's still learning.

Please don't feel too bad though. I know how you feel, I had a really close call on motorway and could only stop and hug dc. They had no idea a lorry almost ploughed into us and I was so shaken up. Once the car's gone you can look ahead more...
Glad your both OK.

PoorOldEnid · 24/09/2008 10:49

we had similar when dd1 was 3

I drew some (admittedly very crap ) pictures and we went through it together. Turned out that the thing that really freaked her out was when i opened her passenger door and her toy rabbit fell out!

she kept the pics and little story for a while then forgot all about it

MissisBoot · 24/09/2008 10:59

Its so difficult isn't it.

Enid - I like your idea about going through it in pictures - Its about finding out how she saw it through her eyes rather than my perception of it.

OP posts:
Acinonyx · 24/09/2008 11:40

Dd still talks about the 'bump' we had coming home from nursery months ago (she's 3). Definitely let her talk it through as often as she wants to. I was in a big accident myself a few years ago and really needed to go over and over it before I could get past it.

We have even done role-playing games that cover not just 'the bump' but alsorts of road related stuff like asking the way to places etc.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page